HOT PRESIDENTING TIP: When Mounting Coups, Make Sure To Do It VERY OFFICIALLY

And if you don’t, it doesn’t even matter because no one can question your motives anyway!

Photo by Stephen Radford on Unsplash

Here it is, y’all, TRUMP IMMUNITY. And it is BONKERS. We were expecting bonkers, but holy shit. This is Daenerys Targaryen. This is time to speed-read a copy of What to Expect When You’re Expecting Fascism, because this country’s water has broken and it’s like eight centimeters dilated.

The question was, "Whether and if so to what extent does a former President enjoy presidential immunity from criminal prosecution for conduct alleged to involve official acts during his tenure in office."

And the 6-3 decision (guess which six!) was PRETTY MUCH ALL OF IT, ALL OF THE TIME.

The Supreme Court decided presidents DO have immunity for official acts. And what’s an official act? Well, they’re not going to decide that right now! They’re going to send it back to Judge Tanya Chutkan to figure out exactly what they meant. Except that they’ve gutted almost all ability for her to figure out anything. They already tossed out that “obstruction of an official proceeding” charge last Friday. And now somehow she is supposed to do this with no evidence from the President, or his advisers, and no discussion of his motives.

Wrote Chief Justice John Roberts, “Trump is absolutely immune from prosecution for the alleged conduct involving his discussions with Justice Department officials.”

Holy shit: "Testimony or private records of the President or his advisers probing such conduct may not be admitted as evidence at trial."

And WTF: “In dividing official from unofficial conduct, courts may not inquire into the President’s motives.”

The Government cannot use evidence of a president's official conduct during a jury trial “to help secure his conviction, even on charges that purport to be based only on his unofficial conduct.” They say that "the 'intended effect' of immunity would be defeated."

Uhh, what? Isn’t motive the heart of the entire “proving criminal conduct” thing?

So she can’t consider testimony from Mark Meadows, or Cassidy Hutchinson, Bill Barr, anybody he did official conduct with. As long as the President is giving official orders to people they have official authority over, then it’s cool.

Does this mean Biden can send Seal Team 6 to assassinate Trump, or could Trump do similarly if he claws his way back into office?

Literally yes. No exaggerations here for effect! Justice Sonia Sotomayor’s dissent puts it right out there: 

"Looking beyond the fate of this particular prosecution, the long-term consequences of today’s decision are stark. The Court effectively creates a law-free zone around the President, upsetting the status quo that has existed since the Founding. This new official-acts immunity now “lies about like a loaded weapon” for any President that wishes to place his own interests, his own political survival, or his own financial gain, above the interests of the Nation. 

The President of the United States is the most powerful person in the country, and possibly the world. When he uses his official powers in any way, under the majority’s reasoning, he now will be insulated from criminal prosecution. Orders the Navy’s Seal Team 6 to assassinate a political rival? Immune. Organizes a military coup to hold onto power? Immune. Takes a bribe in exchange for a pardon? Immune. Immune, immune, immune."

So when doing coups, MAKE SURE to only do them with your official constitutional authority friends!

Would President Biden send Seal Team 6 to assassinate Trump? No, because Democrats are the party of sanity. Would Trump do this the absolute second he gets into office? Haha, who knows! He “retruthed” a post last night that said, “Elizabeth Lynne Cheney is guilty of treason. Retruth if you want televised military tribunals.”

This is bad, y’all. BAD BAD BAD.

BAD?

REALLY FUCKING BAD.

[ruling]