Kristi Noem Can't Be On Your Show Today, Stuck In Terrible Blizzard With Kim Jong-Un!

Brrrrrrr!

Your daily Kristi Noem humiliation today is a really good one, and we hope it isn’t the last one.

If you haven’t seen our piece from yesterday about how even such hallowed journalistic institutions as Newsmax and Fox Business are taking Noem to the gravel pit — over her ridiculous lies about meeting Kim Jong-Un, and also for her grotesque truths about killing God’s furry friends — you need to read that one for context.

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Kristi Noem Taken To Gravel Pit By … [CHECKS NOTES] … Newsmax And Fox Business?

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Then you can catch up on how Fox News’s Greg Gutfeld — another hard-hitter journalism man! — wanted Noem to come on the other night, and she declined because “snowstorm.” Yes, in May.

She could have said the dog ate her homework, we guess, but uh-oh, what dog?

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Justin Baragona at the Daily Beast reports that Noem canceled a planned appearance on “Gutfeld!” on Tuesday night, due to the snow. Yes. There was a snowstorm in South Dakota, therefore alas, could she get a rain check?

Of course, Kristi Noem’s human body was in New York at the time. That’s where she had just finished her comically awful Newsmax and Fox Business interviews. (We were also in New York on Tuesday, and we can confirm that it was a gorgeous day.)

Also, as Baragona explains, there was a winter weather advisory Tuesday in the Black Hills of South Dakota — the far west of the state — but weather in the capital city of Pierre was in the balmy 50s on both Tuesday and Wednesday. (Governors live in the capital city.)

But, you know, “snow.” Just fuckin’ covered in it! Can’t possibly make your thingie, Greg Gutfeld. Kim Jong-Un was there too! Or maybe that was just some other Asian man who passed her in the hallway, it was hard to see due to the blizzard.

Gutfeld made fun of Noem throughout the show that night:

At the top of his show, Gutfeld snarked that Noem’s staff “blamed bad weather” for her bailing, turning to “locals for reaction,” which was a video of dogs barking and swimming in a pool.

“Who knows why she canceled? When we asked how her week was going, she replied ‘ruff.’ Maybe it wasn't bad weather, I heard it was raining cats and dogs,” Gutfeld quipped. “I tried to convince Noem to stay and do our show. I even told her my dog Gus had all his shots. She said not yet he hasn’t.”

Here is Gutfeld clowning on Noem — or whatever counts as clowning in his world — with Dana Perino playing the part of the absent Noem, announcing she had killed yet another dog, named “Ghostwriter.” It wasn’t that funny, because it’s Fox News and these aren’t talented people, but the fact that Noem is a walking “Kick Me” sign right now even for Fox is hilarious.

The Daily Beast notes that CNN’s Dana Bash said yesterday that Noem was supposed to come on that day, but she suddenly canceled that one too.

We hope this doesn’t mean Noem is finished humilating herself every day on TV. Don’t put your media tour out of its misery, Kristi Noem! Come baaaaaaaaaack.

We promise we’ll all be nice, ha ha, just kidding.

[The Daily Beast / video via Zachary Leeman]

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Evan Hurst on Twitter right here. 

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