Pretending Not To Be Off-Putting Sicko Was JD Vance’s Very Clever Debate Strategy!
That'll shock everybody!
Earlier this week, JD Vance participated in the vice presidential debate, and with some success, he tried to come off as a normal decent person who doesn’t even go door-to-door asking to install Ring doorbell cams in women’s uteri. Like, he’s the kind of guy who asks a couch nicely before he fucks it.
We say with some success, because he was still a creepy democracy-killing fascist who lied through his teeth about his support for a national abortion ban.
It’s hard to keep the mask from slipping off for 90 full minutes, obviously.
EARLIER THIS WEEK, YOU REMEMBER!
But reporting from Axios confirms what we all suspected, namely, that pretending to be a decent, non-disgusting, non-fascist creep was strategy and something JD practiced.
Axios says it was Vance’s “plan to surprise Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz by being shockingly ... super-duper nice.” And Axios says it worked! Axios says the debate was “refreshingly substantive, even cheery.” Axios says it was “a preview of what's possible if the nation's current rage subsides.” (Axios is easily led and extremely impressionable.)
But all the same, Axios adds that it was a “premeditated political maneuver to rattle Walz.”
Says a lot about a person when “act like a human” is your big gotcha. Never saw that comin’!
"We figured it would throw him off," a close Vance adviser told us. "Democrats and much of the media bought their own false caricature of JD that he was just some heartless fire-breather."
And so we FAKED like that FALSE CARICATURE wasn’t COMPLETELY ACCURATE.
"JD's focus on bipartisanship was intentional, because we knew it was a side of JD that the media has largely ignored," the Vance adviser told us.
"The goal was to disarm the 'he's an extremist' B.S. by positioning him in the populist center. Democrats may have mindf---ed themselves into believing the caricature they invented."
The caricature they invented, which the Vance camp had to come up with a strategy to counter, by having JD act like Not Himself.
Got it.
Wonder what they did to prepare him. Have him watch videos of abusive husbands in couples therapy trying to convince everybody they’ve really changed?
Anyway, a Walz adviser quoted by Axios said it was indeed surprising. Ya burnt, Tim Walz! For his next trick, JD has memorized one (1) common donut order!
If you watch the clips in this thread from JD’s rally the day after the debate, you can see he was right back to being nasty and smug and off-putting and misogynistic and gross. For instance, he made fun of Walz’s gaffe that he was “friends with school shooters,” by saying it was “probably only the third or fourth dumbest comment Tim Walz made that night."
We’re sure he’ll be back to blood libeling people with dark skin before he knows it, if he hasn’t already.
[Axios]
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Vance's Human Butthair Golem Simulator is still in beta, it seems.
This was a triumph
I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS! Almost.