Teamsters Guy Not Sure Whether Markwayne Mullin Wants To Date Him, Fight Him, Bite Him, Or Shoot Him
Meeee-ow. (But s it a SEXY meow? Or a MAD meow? Or a BOTH meow? Or a MURDER meow?)
Ever since Oklahoma Senator Markwayne Mullin, a Republican obviously, threatened to start a fight during a Senate hearing, he’s been prissing and prancing around the media telling errbody how he was going to break that guy’s face, and how he likes to bite during fights, and how Oklahoma Values voters would be upset with him if he didn’t have bizarrely aggressive pants-pissingly inconsolable cry-stravaganzas every time somebody made fun of him on Twitter. (And posted pictures of him standing on his steppy-stool behind the podium so he can see over the top.)
The fact that he thinks he’s coming out of this looking like a strong dudebro human man suggests a lot about how deficient he is in pretty much all departments.
But what’s been missing is the voice of Sean O’Brien, the Teamsters union leader whom Markwayne Mullin wanted to walk up to and do fighty cartoon dust clouds to. Like so:
Well YAY, because O’Brien did an interview ON FOX NEWS with Neil Cavuto, and boy did he say some funny words about the senator from the state of ‘Roid Rage.
Watch and enjoy:
O’BRIEN: It was the most bizarre thing I’ve ever seen, because first he says we’re “consenting adults,” which was bizarre because it sounded like he wanted to date me.
It do kind of sound like that.
YOU WANNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE? FOR A LONG WALK ON THE BEACH?
AT SUNSET?
O’BRIEN: Then he asked to fight me, and I’m hearin’ now that he wanted to bite me. And then the last post he made was in front of a cachet of automatic weapons where he says “anytime, any place.” So make up your mind: Do you wanna date me, fight me, bite me or shoot me?
Markwayne ain’t gonna like this lippy backtalk from Sean O’Brien, we reckon. He might try to bite Sean O’Brien. Probably on the ankles. Like so:
So much fun. Another datin’ fightin’ bitin’ shootin’ clip after the jump!
So would O’Brien be willing to sit down with Mullin over a cup of coffee for a peaceful grownup conversation? (NOT A DATE THING, MARKWAYNE.)
Sure, he says! On one condition:
CAVUTO: I’m just wondering whether there’s any chance the two of you can bury this hatchet.
O’BRIEN: I have no problem sitting down with anybody, I would have no problem sitting down with Senator Mullin.
I will wear my football equipment because I don’t want to get bit, shot, or caned for that matter. So I will have to protect myself.
Markwayne has been bragging that he saw “fear in [O’Brien’s] eyes” when he got up to go fight him, and he says O’Brien was “very thankful” that Bernie Sanders stepped in. Bless his heart. No rational person believes Little Milktoast for a second.
But he’s probably telling himself this is O’Brien admitting that he’s scared of him.
It’s OK, all normal people understand O’Brien was just making another joke at Markwayne’s expense, because it’s easy and fun.
Neil Cavuto laughed.
Seethe, Oklahoma boy.
[videos via Acyn]
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So what I'm hearing loud and clear from Marky Markwayne is that he's a master biter.
What? It was RIGHT THERE.
I feel it’s my duty to remind you all that the official Wonkette Style Manual requires that Markwayne be spelled, pronounced, and henceforth, should the opportunity present itself, addressed as “MarQuane”
~ Yours in service.