Uh Oh, Dear Leader Posted 160 Times In Five Hours
Time to get grandpa a Jitterbug!
In the days after Donald John Trump was elected again, a decision was made at the words factory not to cover every little dumb and crazy thing that comes out of Donald Trump’s bologna lips. Because that would be all we did all day, and who would even want to hear it? But on Monday the 79-year-old posted 160 times in five hours, crescendoing at one point to posting more than once a minute.
Later in the evening the posts became him re-posting, we mean re-TRUTHING, the exact same thing he’d just posted a second before, sometimes with an added comment on the re-repost, sometimes not. It’s getting kind of hard to ignore that his brain is ... not what it once was. And by the person-woman-man-camera-TV standards of his first term, that is saying something.
REMEMBER WHEN?
Trump kicked off his epic evening at 7:09 p.m., with a ramble about how Barack Obama’s attorney general Eric Holder wants to pack the Supreme Court, then he careened into the filibuster.
Why is Eric Holder’s opinion of the Supreme Court relevant? We are going to guess it is because he is Black, handsome, and FAST AND FURIOUS is a hobbyhorse Republicans have been dry-humping since 2011. What crimes did Eric Holder allegedly commit during that operation? Only ask Trump that question if you want to be called stupid and ugly!
As for the other 159 posts that followed, holy sheesh. Much was the usual. He attacked Mark Kelly some more for being a TRAITOR, and Gavin Newsom, Tim Walz, etc. He posted a clip of himself with Macaulay Culkin in 1992’s Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. He ranted about Democratic candidate Aftyn Behn hating Christianity and country music again, and rhapsodized about his beautiful ballroom some more, as is now his daily habit.
But like his beautiful ballroom, the president’s brain is a tangle of staircases to nowhere, and nobody knows how low or high it’s going to go.
This low: Alex Jones said that Patrick Byrne said that Michelle Obama MAY have used Biden’s autopen for pardons!
Ah yes, the Overstock dot com Stop The Steal weirdo who had an affair with that Russian spy, we remember him! Hey, did Trump hand-sign all 1,570 pardons for his cherished January 6 tourists with his own Sharpie? Inquiring minds want to know!
And how they hate Michelle Obama so, with burning and enduring passion! What an affront to Trump’s masculinity, that lawyer woman whose muscular arms are so strong she could surely sign her own name two thousand times a day.
Trump accused Honduras of election fraud.
Looks like Honduras is trying to change the results of their Presidential Election. If they do, there will be hell to pay! The people of Honduras voted in overwhelming numbers on November 30th. The National Electoral Commission, the official body charged with counting the Votes, abruptly stopped counting at midnight on November 30th. Their count showed a close race between Tito Asfura and Salvador Nasralla with Asfura holding a narrow lead of 500 votes. Their tally was stopped when only 47 percent of the Vote was counted. It is imperative that the Commission finish counting the Votes. Hundreds of thousands of Hondurans must have their Votes counted. Democracy must prevail!
Guess he is working on some kind of Art of The Deal with Honduras, following pardoning their drug-running former president. And speaking of drugs, looks like El Chapo’s son Joaquín Guzmán López just pleaded guilty. Remember when Trump gave his mother and 16 other members of the family golden visas to stay in the US as part of some kind a deal with his brother back in May? Seems rather under-reported. Then there’s Trump’s deals with El Salvador’s Nayib Bukele and those MS-13 gang members. Add pardoning Ross Ulbricht, and you’ve got a lot of drug dealer deals!
REMEMBER?
WE DIGRESS.
After that, Trump’s feed skidded off the rails. He re-shared a re-Truth of AI slop of a head in a Guy Fawkes mask, robotically intoning the 20-years-in-prison penalty for refusing an order.
He re-Troofed the BOMBSHELL that he is going to RICO George Soros and Reid Hoffman for radicalizing America’s youth, and then he started re-Truthing the re-Truths he just Truthed. Site glitchy? Free Tina Peters! Free Tina Peters! Deport Ilhan Omar! Deport Ilhan Omar! Tom Homan! Tom Homan! Travel ban for everybody! No asylum! Arghablarghagarble! And he re-Truthed that Nancy Pelosi spent two years planning January 6.
The line between mental illness and MAGA conspiracy theories gets mighty hazy sometimes.
Meanwhile, the White House said that MRI Trump got, of his brain or his ass, he wasn’t sure, was actually of his abdomen and cardiovascular system, and was “preventative,” and “perfect” and “excellent.” Or as excellent as anyone’s with chronic venous insufficiency can be, we assume. Also we’re no geriatric brain doctors or anything, but a preventative MRI does not appear to be a thing. The guy sure takes a lot of cognitive tests! We can only assume Trump’s doctors are seeing what the rest of us see: the district possibility that the elevators aren’t going all the way up to the penthouse any more.
So, who is actually in charge over there? Trump’s been hollering, AI slopping and TREASONING that members of the military can’t refuse any order, but then when it came to the commander-in-chief and those drug boat survivors being blown up in the Caribbean, he said he didn’t want a second strike. How could a command Trump didn’t even know about count as his? Hope some congressional hearings about all that mass murder going on will help clarify!
But don’t worry, his undergrunts have it all covered, boss! Kristi Noem and her handler Corey Lewandowski and Pam Bondi are defending the homefront; Russ Vought is gutting the government; Stephen Miller is providing spiritual guidance; den mother Susie Wiles is keeping Scott Bessent from taking swings at everybody; and Steve Witkoff and Jared Kushner will handle the rest of the world! With cameos from JD Vance, who has not been seen since November 26, bitching to the 101st Airborne Division that nobody likes turkey. Is he involved with any day-to-day these days? On his ninth vacation (at least) of the year? On a retreat to save his marriage since Charlie Kirk’s widow ran her fingers through his hair and his wife Usha took off her wedding ring? Who knows!
Whatever the arrangements, they clearly give Poppy plenty of executive time, where he’s free to slip a Diet Coke, flip on the Fox News or scroll through whatever AI slop Stephen Miller’s Nazi elves have made for him, and cuddle up with Margo Martin, Laura Loomer or whoever’s slim fingers are tapping the posts, until it is time for another show at the Oval Office, or trip to the golf course.
Nice work if you can get it! And when you’re Trump, you can get it even if you’re fried.
[Daily Beast archive link / Trump Truth Social, but probably you don’t want to click on that.]
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Okay. I think we are now truly lost
Just a few minutes ago at another Trump blow job round table
“Kristi Noem: "Sir, you made it through hurricane season without a hurricane. You kept the hurricanes away. We appreciate that."
I just can’t with these people.
Gavin Newsom released a summary of the results from his recent medical exam.
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