Meet The Blockheaded Degenerate Trump Just Picked To Replace Tulsi Gabbard As DNI
Time to get to know Bill Pulte a whole lot better.
In this time of idiocracy, Donald Trump has replaced Tulsi Gabbard, the clownfuckingly incompetent former director of national intelligence with a soft spot for dictators, with Bill Pulte, the blockheaded golden boy construction heir who runs the Federal Housing Finance Agency and chairs Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. He will reportedly continue to serve in those roles as he oversees, in an acting capacity, the intelligence apparatus of what until recently was the greatest superpower in world history. He, of course, has no intelligence experience.
Haha, nothing matters anymore.
Bill Pulte is a stupid man’s idea of a stupid man. This is the mouthbreathing dipshit who’s been pulling things out of the dump section of his underpants and telling Trump officials they’re evidence of “mortgage fraud” committed by whichever Democrat Donald Trump is mad at that day. Careful readers will note that nobody has actually been successfully prosecuted for “mortgage fraud.” (Also might remember that the thing he said those people did with their mortgages, his own father and stepmother also did with their mortgage. Again, fucking dipshit.)
This is a man whose absolute incompetence has frustrated even now-acting Attorney General Todd Blanche. Back in the fall, it was reported that Blanche wanted former moron “weaponization” czar Ed Martin and Pulte investigated for misconduct in their investigations into Trump’s political enemies, how they had completely fumblefucked the politically motivated mortgage fraud probes into, among others, Federal Reserve Governor Lisa Cook, Fulton County DA Fani Willis, New York state Attorney General Letitia James and Senator Adam Schiff.
And Todd Blanche is a pretty incompetent Trump butt-sniffer himself! So if Todd Blanche thinks you are a complete buffoon, what does that say about you?
To Donald Trump, it says you should be the nation’s next DNI!
Prefer a non-Substack subscription? The button below will take any amount of your choosing at Paypal — let me know if you want the newsletter subscription too! they’re separate! — or we have a Patreon too.
Articles abound about what a dangerous and stupid choice Pulte is (it’s a good third of tomorrow’s Tabs!), and many of them note that lots of Republicans think this is a deranged pick. Thom Tillis, the retiring Republican senator from North Carolina, said on CNBC that Pulte is a mere “incendiary attack dog,” and that “I don’t think he has a prayer” of actually being confirmed by the Senate for the permanent role.
“Whoever told the president to go ahead and commit to this publicly before vetting it should lose their jobs, because they should know that the math just works against Pulte being confirmed,” said Tillis. “I’m tired of amateur hour,” also said Tillis.
And more:
“I don’t believe he’s ever had a security clearance. He clearly has no experience in intelligence, he has no geopolitical experience, no international connections — the sorts of things you would look for” in a DNI, Tillis said.
Bill Cassidy said he doesn’t think Pulte is “competent” for the role. “The Senate doesn’t have any role to play in terms of confirming acting officials, but I see no evidence of any qualifications for that job,” says John Cornyn.
But it’s not just Republican senators with a foot out the door who are speaking up against Pulte. Lisa Murkowski said, “I’m not familiar that there is anything in his background that would qualify [him] as one who would be the head of our national intelligence. I know what he has been doing in the housing sector. I’m not so familiar with why the president would have selected him.” Susan Collins is concerned … about whether he even has a security clearance.
Senate Majority Leader John Thune told reporters Tuesday, “We don’t need a weaponized DNI, we need professionals there.” Bad news about the entire Trump regime, John.
(Cowardly milquetoast men like Tom Cotton were, of course, afraid to speak up against Pulte.)
It’s not like everybody in the regime even likes the dude. This is, after all, the guy Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent famously threatened at the opening of the Executive Branch club in Georgetown to “punch you in your fucking face,” and offered to take it outside so he could “fucking beat your ass.” (Many House Republicans were reportedly very much on Bessent’s side in that squabble. As we said, Pulte is not well-liked.)
But apparently Pulte is close with Commerce Secretary Howard Nutlick, which would put him squarely on the Epstein-protecting side of the administration, so that’s gotta be a plus.
And Pulte is a committed bootlicker, as most MAGA men with heads shaped like that are, and Trump thinks he’s a pit bull, and Trump gets tingles in his scaly inner thighs for men he thinks are pit bulls. And he’s just full of stupid ideas he thinks are big, good ideas, just like his boss. For example:
Most embarrassingly, he reportedly sold Trump on 50-year mortgages at the president’s golf club via a posterboard that was shockingly devoid of any information. The backlash from congressional Republicans (and anyone with any knowledge of housing policy) was swift, leading Trump to back down from the idea.
Also, who showed Trump that Doctor Jesus meme that got Trump in so much trouble when he posted it? This fucking degen.
Semafor reports that this was a Roger Stone special, that Pulte is actually close with Gabbard, and that all the mouthbreathers and wingnuts are cumming themselves in anticipation that Pulte is going to go to ODNI, overseeing all the nation’s 18 intelligence agencies, and start declassifying ALL THE SEEKRITS. As Democratic Senator Mark Warner, vice chair of the Senate Intelligence Committee, remarked:
“If he’s been able to manipulate and weaponize mortgage information, think about if you got the keys to all of the intelligence agencies,” Sen. Mark Warner, D-Va., the vice chair of the Senate Intelligence Committee, said. “I’m worried about his willingness to take a fabricated piece of intelligence, or a raw piece of intelligence that has not been verified, and use it as an excuse to interfere in the elections.”
The kinds about all the Republicans in the Epstein files who have raped little children? Haha no! The Trump regime protects those!
We of course speak of the secrets these inbreds believe exist about the rigging of the 2020 election and the Russia hoax, things like that. Which means he’s poised to pick up where Inspector Gabbard left off, in her trenchcoat outside the ballot-storing facility in Atlanta.
Which of course would mean he’s excited to get to work helping Trump steal the midterms and probably somehow the 2028 election. Every one of these try-hards is a worthless fascist at his blockheaded core.
So yes, it turns out Pulte is exactly whom we should’ve expected Trump would pick as his next director of national intelligence. The only way it doesn’t make sense is if you’re still laboring under the pathetic delusion that any of these people take their oaths seriously, or that they’re in their positions to try to do their actual jobs well. Trump put this oaf and his square dumbass MAGA head in charge to continue his campaign of retribution, because Donald Trump is too much of a thin-skinned pussy baby to just rise to the occasion and be president.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
However, speaking of Warner, Thune, and the Senate, this promises to be even more of a headache for Thune than it might appear at first glance, even if Trump doesn’t nominate Pulte for the permanent position, as this scoop from Jake Sherman explains:
Oops. Can’t imagine how a meathead like Bill Pulte might abuse something like FISA. Wait yes we can.
So will behind-the-scenes congressional activity make Bill Pulte’s selection go the way of Trump’s slush fund for traitors and child rapists?
Can Trump fail that much this week? Time will tell!
But we’ve learned not to bet against Trump finding a way to be the biggest fucking loser on the planet each and every day of his skidmarked life.
OPEN THREAD.
[CNBC]
Want to read more Evan than just what’s at Wonkette? Visit The Moral High Ground and subscribe to it!
Follow me on Instagram!
And on BlueSky!
And on Facebook!
Fuck you AI moderator!
AI tries to steal my art and now it wants to take away the joy I get from smashing trolls?
Fuck no!
My reaction (via Harry's face) to the auto moderator that Substack turned on automatically: It would have been nice if we had been given the option of turning it on, not required to opt out of a thing we didn’t know was being foisted upon us.
Original Substack notice: on.substack.com/p/intro…
You can just turn it off.
“How to set up Reply rules
Reply rules can be set directly on your publication or on the Substack app. On web, follow these steps:
Go to your publication's Settings page.
Scroll to the Community section. Click the toggle next to "Enable automatic moderation". “
https://substack.com/@ziggywiggy/note/c-270092118?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2knfuc