Michigan State Rep Wants To Make Gay Marriage Illegal Again, Still Very Bad At Rapping
As if there were a question!
Last week, Michigan state Rep. Josh Schriver announced that he was taking a break from all of his devices (some of which we can assume were of the “Medieval torture” variety) in order to “pray, read, write and spend quality time with family for Thanksgiving.”
Clearly he had some kind of revelation, for upon coming back, the first words out of his mouth (at least on Xitter), were “Make gay marriage illegal again. This is not remotely controversial, nor extreme.”
Now, given that the vast majority of people in the United States now support same sex marriage, it’s fair to say that it is, perhaps, a bit controversial and extreme. Just a little! But this has become a common tactic of extremists — who have more or less figured out that the most effective way to get people to go along with their very controversial and extreme beliefs is by repeatedly saying that they are not extreme or controversial, or claiming they are based in “natural law” or other nonsense like that.
Now, because the vast majority of sane people have expatriated from Twitter to Bluesky, the responses were a mix of a few normal folks pointing out that this is very controversial and extreme, along with some gay Republicans who were somehow unaware that they had voted for the Leopards Eating People’s Faces Party and were shocked and dismayed to discover that any of their compatriots still felt this way.
“Bro I voted for you,” said one soon to be faceless supporter. “Get rid of income taxes and we can talk otherwise this is unfair to consenting adults. Why is the government involved in marriage at all is the real question we should be asking.”
Of course, there were also a whole bunch of Republicans who were thrilled to pieces by the idea, because marriage was invented by their God for the purposes of procreation and nothing else.
“Gay marriage should be illegal again because the Bible clearly opposes it,” wrote one person who was definitely very excited for the United States to become a theocracy. “Leviticus calls same-sex acts an abomination, Romans describes them as unnatural, and 1 Corinthians lists homosexuality among sins that bar entry into God's kingdom. Marriage in scripture is always between a man and a woman, as seen in Genesis and Ephesians. Legalizing it goes against these teachings.” To be fair, sometimes marriage was between a man and 500 women. But other than that!
Then there were those who might have been better off sitting this one out.
“How does the fact that my spouse is a female instead of a male affect you or anyone in the world at all? Please be specific!” said noted transphobe Martina Navratilova, who clearly failed to consider that she is in no way affected by trans people simply existing, either.
As an aside, I have actually been far more personally affected by Martina Navratilova’s specific marriage — having sat through her wife’s butchering of La Traviata on the last season of “Real Housewives of Miami” — than Martina Navratilova has ever been affected by a trans woman peeing in the bathroom stall next to her. Just saying!
There were also a lot of Republicans who seemed to be under the impression that their party was now accepting of same-sex marriage, and who will probably be fairly surprised when the Trump appointees on the Supreme Court overturn both Obergefell v. Hodges and Lawrence v. Texas (the one that got rid of sodomy laws), as Clarence Thomas has clearly stated he hopes to do in the near future.
As repellent as Schriver is, he is correct when it comes to his own party’s endgame, because this will be one of the consequences of voting Republican whether people think that’s what they’re voting for or not.
This is not the first time we have heard from Josh Schriver. He actually caught our attention earlier this year when he lost his staff and all of his committee assignments in the Michigan state House for saying a bunch of Nazi shit — specifically for sharing a Jack Posobiec meme about the white supremacist conspiracy theory “the Great Replacement.”
Unsurprisingly, he uses the same rhetorical devices to push white supremacist grievances as he does to push his anti-gay nonsense, as you can see from our article about him from this past February:
“White erasure is wrong. This isn’t controversial.” (It’s also not a thing!)
“There is an anti-White agenda. No one is ‘racist’ for talking about it.” (No there isn’t and yes, you are!)
“I’m a Christian…not a racist.” (These things are not incompatible!)
“‘White men can’t jump’ This seems a bit exaggerated. Thoughts?” (Yeah, that’s the title of a 1992 movie starring Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes — not to mention a delightful Rosie Perez — not a cherished and popular idiom, and in the movie Woody Harrelson is in fact very good at jumping!)
“Do the Democrats know that Joe Biden is ... White?” (Yes, they do. Which would throw something of a wrench into this theory of white oppression he’s grasping onto so tightly.)
“I’m a White rapper and most conservative voting Representative in Michigan. I guess it was only a matter of time before I was falsely labeled a ‘raaacist!’” (“Raaacist,” notably, is a thing exclusively said/typed by people who are extremely racist.)
What a doll!
But what was that? He’s a “white rapper”? Well, I guess we should take a listen then, no?
Eminem, he’s not.
The fact is, Josh Schriver may actually be one of the few people who is actually aware of what his party stands for and what the consequences of voting for Republicans like him actually are. Remember, we are talking about people who lost their everloving minds over some rainbow shit in Target and who spent the better part of the last few years trying to make it illegal to mention that gay people even exist in schools and calling those who thought this was appalling “groomers.” As soon as they can make anti-gay hate the mobilizing force it once was, the more they will all sound exactly like Josh Schriver. Just watch.
PREVIOUSLY ON WONKETTE!
He looks like the emoji version of “Why do these gay guys keep sucking my dick”
I am not of the gay, nor do I play one on the teevees, and I am not in possession of the homodar, or whatever you call it. But this guy can suck my dick, if you know what I mean.