White House Dementia Care Unit Helpfully Labels Oval Office With Giant, Comforting Gold Letters
We've reached the Post-Its phase.
Yesterday, some very “IYKYK” pictures started appearing on the internet, see if you are one of the ones who knows immediately what they likely signify. The first was shared by CNN’s Kaitlan Collins. “Looks like there is a new sign outside the Oval Office,” she tweeted.
The sign was spotted yesterday morning while Trump had company over for breakfast, some Republican senators who had come to discuss all their current failings, we guess.
Well, speaking of “failing.”
We’ve been discussing Donald Trump’s mystery MRIs and his new round of bragging about the “aptitude” tests he thinks he’s acing, which are actually dementia tests.
Something is happening with his brain. We all know it. The people around him likely know it. He may be the only one who doesn’t understand it.
But now they’ve put up paper signs to label “The Oval Office,” made to look from a distance like they’re just as cheap as the shitty Home Depot gold gilding the patient has been putting all over the walls during craft time every day.
If you know, then you know.
The sign for the Oval is, again, in the same ugly style as Grandpa’s “interior design,” which suggests to us that, much like paving the Rose Garden to make it look like the outdoor dining area of a tacky chain restaurant and/or Mar-a-Lago, they’re trying to make the place as comfortable and familiar as possible for him.
So that he may hospice in place while Undead Satan and the Couchfucker run the country? Sure seems like it.
Is the Oval Office hard to pick out? Is there something about it that might tip a casual visitor or the currently serving president off to which one it is? Perhaps something in the shape of the walls? Anything?
Do we think the Republican senators or whichever tech oligarch has stopped by to slurp cock needs help identifying which one is “oval”?
Or do we think somebody else needs that?
Anybody who has ever cared for a loved one with dementia knows about Post-Its and labels. Notes to remind them which is the bathroom, which is the kitchen, notes to remind them why they are where they are, where familiar people are. It’s often the questions they’re asking over and over again, the questions their loved ones are happy to answer, but might go a little bit apeshit if they have to answer them 140 times per day.
It’s literally on the Post-Its website, how they can be helpful to people with Alzheimer’s and their caregivers.
We are left to wonder if there is a Post-It on Donald’s golden toilet to remind him where the cacophonous grunts are supposed to happen, and another on the Constitution, to remind him what to wipe his shameful hole with.
Who knows. What we see for sure is this golden “OVAL OFFICE” sign, on cheap printed out paper, for the world’s cheapest man. Comedian Akilah Hughes suggested maybe it’s helpful in keeping him from accidentally ending up on the roof again.
One of the Sunday school dropouts who does comms for Stupid Hitler’s regime pissily told the Daily Beast that “President Trump is making the White House beautiful and giving it the glory it deserves. Only the Daily Beast and people with a severe case of Trump Derangement Syndrome would find a problem with that.”
Which quite frankly makes more sense if you imagine that he has to say that to keep the patient from having a tantrum, if you imagine him saying it directly to Trump.
“Yes, Mister President! We’re making the White House beautiful and giving it the glory it deserves! Only the Daily Beast and people with a severe case of Trump Derangement Syndrome would find a problem with that!”
They can talk about Joe Biden’s autopen all they want, but nobody ever labeled rooms in GREAT BIG LETTERS for Joe Biden, and you can bet Jake Tapper would have left a snail trail leading from the Oval to the nearest TV camera if they had.
It’s been unclear exactly when Trump (allegedly) aced his latest dementia test. Is he bragging about something that just happened, or is it something that feels like it just happened, perhaps because it was such a successful day, something his brain clings to just like it clings to his fabricated memories of ending eight wars? (Invert his statements about ending those “wars” like it’s a group of staffers taking him by the hand and gently trying to guide him to the bathroom after an accident, as he begs them to tell him about ending the eight wars again. A lot of his statements work a hell of a lot better when you imagine them like that.)
Is he talking about the dementia test he took in 2018, where he stood in front of the world and proudly identified which one was “camel”?
We just don’t know.
We do know that, on top of the rest of the trashy destruction being visited upon the White House under King Dipshit’s reign, Rep. Malcolm Kenyatta is correct that it looks like shit.
Senator Lisa Blunt Rochester noted similarly that “this is not a good sign.” (Two meanings there!)
Rep. Jared Moskowitz saw the bright side, suggesting that “new signage means he won’t knock it down.”
And of course Gavin Newsom is just fucking with him:
One thing’s for sure, and it’s that if we’ve reached the “needs signs to remind him where he is” stage of Emperor Dementia’s final term in office, shit is gonna get WEIRD, and we’re going to see muuuuuuch more evidence of it.
Caligula may not have actually made his horse a senator, but he wanted to. Will Trump start playing dress-up with his Cabinet members and giving them new “jobs”? What wonderful costumes will Marco Rubio and Pam Bondi be required to wear to amuse him?
This is going to be hilarious, we mean terrifying!
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I liked the Menswear Guy's take, too: "this looks like a trick daffy duck would put up to get bugs bunny into 'the oval office'"
https://bsky.app/profile/dieworkwear.bsky.social/post/3m4w5x2e7rc2x
My father had dementia for 12 years. When I couldn't take care of him at home anymore he had to go into a nursing home, but it soon developed that when he was walking back from the dining room to his bedroom, he would get confused and go into someone else's bedroom and actually get into the bed.
Well he was a violin maker and fiddle player for most of his adult life, so I found a large poster with a close-up HD photo of a violin on it, framed it, hung it on the outside of his bedroom door, and told him to "Look for the fiddle." This worked perfectly. He never got lost again.
So yeah, this sign outside the Oval Office is highly suspicious.