Sean Hannity Learns All About The Epstein Files!
With the help of liberal radio superhero Stephanie Miller.
It’s generally accepted that, as a rule, people of integrity and decency and intelligence should not go on Fox News. It’s generally a bullshit proposition, if you’re there you’re meant to be a punching bag, the token liberal for them to scream at and punch in the face for the delight of their cousin-humping viewers. Sometimes they invite you on because you’ve done something they want to make fun of, maybe they’ve been siccing their syphilitic mad cow viewers on you and they want to give you a chance to “defend” yourself. (LOL.)
Yes, usually, if you get the call to go on Fox, your answer should be to tell them to fuck off with prejudice.
There are exceptions, of course. Pete Buttigieg is allowed to go on Fox News, and it is a good idea when he does. He freaks them out so much, it’s hilarious.
Texas whippersnapper and Democratic US Senate candidate James Talarico is allowed to go on Fox News and gently make their white conservative viewers quietly question their eternal salvation while turning their preening boy hosts into babbling dipshits.
And it turns out Stephanie Miller — longtime progressive radio host, she’s hilarious, you know her, you love her — is also allowed, and encouraged, though we imagine after last night on Hannity they won’t be asking her again.
Her invitation was the second kind we mentioned above, the “we want to make fun of you for something you did” kind, which is supposed to entertain the human armpit farts who fall asleep in their bedpans while watching Fox at night, instead of getting good-night phone calls from their adult children.
The MAGA mouthbreather media is shit-cumming itself over a video of Miller kissing Texas Rep. Jasmine Crockett’s feet. It was silliness, obviously, but that’s the exact kind of bait the right-wing noise machine loves to take, because they’re not normal people who experience healthy human joy, and they’re not capable of laughing if the joke doesn’t make them feel superior in some way.
Anyway, if you don’t mainline that right-wing media shit like meth from between the cushions of JD Vance’s West Virginia childhood couch — allegedly! — you have no idea MAGA has been rubbing itself raw over this non-story, but we guarantee your racist pigfuck uncle does. The Daily Mail has it, the New York Post has it, and last night, in typical Murdochian fashion — that thing where they amplify a story fully incestuously, by responding to “controversies” they themselves created — Sean Hannity had Miller on for a friendly conversation about it.
Miller did not give Hannity the interview he was hoping for.
Just watch these videos, we’re not going to spoil them. Acyn’s previews are enough.
“You know the funniest thing about this story — is Trump’s all over the Epstein files and I wonder if they’re going to release that after the big bombshell! I didn’t see anything about that on Fox News today,” said Miller.
When did she notice Joe Biden’s mental decline?
“Well, I think it was through all of the times that Donald Trump has fallen asleep in public and talked about magnets getting wet …”
Yep, that’s how you do that.
It’s hilarious that Sean Hannity — always a good time to remind readers what Rupert Murdoch really thinks of Hannity — really thought it would work, that it would be a clever gotcha! to ask Stephanie Miller about Joe Biden’s cognitive decline. You know, especially when the other main story in the news right now about Donald Trump, besides the files related to his best friend — the dead childfucker, the one with whom he shared what he clearly believed was a deliciously dirty secret — is his rapidly onsetting and painfully obvious dementia.
Sean Hannity really thought that’d get her. (Maybe Hannity needs to sit with a doctor and try to pick out which one is “camel.”)
Instead, Miller said, “My mom had dementia, so I recognize it.”
And it’s true, people who have had loved ones with dementia, they can recognize it, in the way Trump repeats the same confused information over and over again verbatim, in the way he stares off into the distance totally empty-headed while men are collapsing next to him, in the way they’re putting up signs in the White House to tell him where he is.
You can watch another clip of the interview here.
We get it. Hannity really needed to take the bait, to distract his dumbass viewers with stories like this last night. ZOMG! Stephanie Miller kissed Jasmine Crockett’s feet! Literally anything to distract from the Epstein Files revelations about President Bad Touch who Jeffrey Epstein said in an email was grosser than he was.
Hey, pop quiz! When a world-famous child rapist says his best friend is grosser than he is, what does that suggest about his best friend? RIGHT ANSWERS ONLY!
What else were they going to talk about? Trump’s godawful interview with Laura Ingraham where he said we need 600,000 students from China and H-1B visas because America’s workers don’t have the “talent,” and that people really need to shut the fuck up about so-called “affordability”? Last night, Ingraham showed more of that interview, the part in the Oval Office where Trump started babbling about painting the Eisenhower Executive Office Building tacky-ass McMansion white, while Ingraham tried to pretend she wasn’t throwing up in her mouth. This after she asked him out loud in a clip aired the night before if the ugly gold diarrhea all over the Oval Office is from Home Depot. (Yes, sure looks that way.)
Yeah, we understand why Hannity needed to distract his viewers from literally everything last night with WOKE WHITE LADY KISSED THE BLACK LADY WHO SCARES US RIGHT ON THE FEET!
Unfortunately, what she gave him in return was Trump being all over the child rapist files, and fucking magnets, the president literally does not know how they work.
And that is why Stephanie Miller is allowed to go on Fox News but unfortunately will not ever be asked again.
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Epstein didn't say "grosser". He said "groceries". It's an old word. He just started using it.
Fuck Ted Cruz.
I'm fucking tired of all the MAGA lies, the sheer depravity, the open corruption, the bold shamelessness, the cruelty, the hypocrisy, and their "fuck you we do what we want!" mentality.
May Trump and his klan of stupid assholes, grifters and bigots crash and burn in hell for eternity.