Sweet Leilani! Wonkette One-A-Day for 5/21/26!
Wonkette afternoon post roundup!
Good afternoon, fellow kids! Did I forget to One-A-Day at you yesterday and the day before, my first two days back at work since my magnificent Hawaiian Family Booze And Fun?
Well, of course I did. First of all, the first day back at work was on the plane (the second plane), and nobody should ever try to work on the plane. And the second day back at work was yesterday and I had to get off at 3 to go fix Shy’s Birthday Coq Au Vin (it was amazing, no of course I did not make the croutons, that’s just showing off).
So what did we have for you today but not yesterday or the day before, you will just have to go to the website for those and look for yourself? Well, first, there were tabs and they were magnificent.
OH SO NOW IT’S ILLEGAL FOR ME TO TAKE MY FAMILY TO HAWAII? No, but Secretary Road Rules is a real little bitch.
There was more First Amendment Find Out that came out today, you will have to read tomorrow’s tabs to learn about it, because it happened after!
Also this other little bitch.
Please note addition to Official Wonkette Style Guide: slush fund is now Crime-Droog Slush Fund, thank you for your attention to this matter.
And for your feelgood story of the day, we leave you with LOLLLLL Zohran Bezos cagefight heart emoji heart emoji heart emoji :D
We shall see you bright and early for tabs!
“nobody should ever try to work on the plane”
Truer words never spoken.
For some reason I always try to work on the plane, but then I end up just having a glass of wine or three and watching some in-flight entertainment. “Ooh, I can watch Hairspray and then a nature show about capybaras or something, that’ll fill out the duration of the flight.”
WTF! The usual embedded commercials are bad enough, but when I click on Chris Isaak I get Victoria's Secret Jesus and a voiceover telling me what God wants, and that is just too much.