Wonkette's today in news! Let it snow let it snow let it snow!

I got mad in tabs!

Tight Budget? Walmart Has A ... Wait Just A Fucking Minute, Upworthy. Tabs, Fri., Jan. 12, 2024

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Evan decided to write it up even though fuck that guy.

Trump Didn’t Improvise Manhattan Courtroom Bitch Tantrum. That Was REHEARSED.

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BE MAD ANYWAY.

Let Us All Congratulate Ohio On Not Throwing A Woman In Prison For Miscarrying

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Second in a SERies.

Colorado GOP Rep. Doug Lamborn Quitting Congress To Spend More Time Hunting Big Bird

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Oh DOK.

Dickish Florida School Dicks Interdict Dictionaries For Being Too Dang Sexy

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Is Sara AMUSING TO YOU? (Yes.)

Aussie Julia Stiles Now Queen Of The Danes!

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Nice … Time?

Massachusetts Will Now Wait Until Legal Drinking Age To Sentence People To Life In Prison

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I was at the doctor and haven’t read this one, it seems bad?

Texas And Border Patrol Now In Armed Standoff With Each Other, Jefferson Davis Unavailable For Comment Because He's Dead

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Sure, why not.

New Hampshire Republicans Hope To Ban Abortion Before Conception

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Seriously, fuck!

Jesus Christ, Just Leave Trans People Alone!

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Well I think she should stop!

I'm A Lawyer Who Is Timid IRL!

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This one’s crazy. Let’s have a drink.

Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Spaghett!

We’ll see you this weekend if you still have power, but we won’t see you Monday, we’re taking Martin Luther King Day off!