Did Rudy Giuliani Just Pay The F*ck Up?
Will keep his houses in exchange for yet another promise to shut the hell up, AGAIN.
Welp, so ends one story line of Rudy Giuliani, the Scotch-soaked sleep paralysis demon, AKA COVID-farting pervert, AKA Trump’s co-conspirator number one; he’s now settled his lawsuit against the two women whose lives he ruined with his racist lies, thus ending all current litigation between them. Only just a week after he was found in contempt by judges Lewis Liman and Beryl Howell, with Howell even floating the prospect of jail, too!
Trump’s Temu Roy Cohn Tweet-bragged that he got to keep his Florida condo, and his New York apartment, and his collection of World Series rings.
I have reached a resolution of the litigation with the Plaintiffs that will result in a satisfaction of the Plaintiffs’ judgment. This resolution does not involve an admission of liability or wrongdoing by any of the Parties. I am satisfied with and have no grievances relating to the result we have reached. I have been able to retain my New York coop [sic] and Florida Condominium and all of my personal belongings. No one deserves to be subjected to threats, harassment, or intimidation. This litigation has taken its toll on all parties. This whole episode was unfortunate. I and the Plaintiffs have agreed not to ever talk about each other in any defamatory manner, and I urge others to do the same.
He also Tweeted out a picture of a panting Pomeranian in a tie to a soundtrack of “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.” Because of course he has a lap dog that he dresses in a tie.
“Vinny loves hanging out at Mar-a-Lago, but he's ready to spend a lot more time in Washington, D.C. over the course of the next four years in support of his favorite President—Donald J. Trump! 🇺🇸”
Anyway, what gives? Did some oligarch Abel Magwitch swoop in to pay some part of the $145,969,000 plus post-judgment interest at the rate of 5.01 percent per annum plus costs and attorneys’ fees that he owes to Ruby Freeman and Shaye Moss? Speculation is swirling that Elon or some techbros took up a collection, though it seems unlikely, given how Trump’s orbit is full of self-dealing barrel-crabs who wouldn’t spit on each other if they were on fire. But who knows, maybe they rallied to bail him out as a special inaugural favor.
Did Rudy’s Staten Island divorce lawyer threaten everybody by leaving old pairs of his horse dentures in their beds? Did Freeman and Moss simply reach peak exhaustion having to go to court every month and look at his sneering, weaselly little face, plus no doubt new rounds of threats from kooks every time their names appeared in the news? We will never know, as details of the settlement are sealed, but sounds like the last one was a big part of it. Freeman and Moss said in a statement:
The past four years have been a living nightmare. We have fought to clear our names, restore our reputations, and prove that we did nothing wrong. Today is a major milestone in our journey. We have reached an agreement and can now move forward with our lives. We have agreed to allow Mr. Giuliani to retain his property in exchange for compensation and his promise not to ever defame us.
Thus ends the financial-liability side of his defamation case, somehow, though he could still wind up in DC jail if he still will not shut the fuck up with his lies about those election workers and they decide to take him back to Judge Beryl Howell’s no-nonsense court yet again. Is he crazy enough to keep blabbing? Maybe! Like a codger showing you scraps of paper from his wallet on the bus, the guy only has about two stories he repeats over and over. Maybe he will rotate in more racist fantasies about Haitians and Palestinians now.
(By the way, our Liz noticed that Judge Lewis Liman just got liberated from Rudy on his docket, only to get saddled with the case of Blake Lively vs. Wayfarer Studios and Justin “Manbun” Baldoni et al. That poor guy can’t catch a break!)
But disbarred pants-dropper Rudy also isn’t escaping courtrooms any time soon; he still has other cases pending.
He and Fox News are being sued by Smartmatic for election-fraud lies, and Smartmatic has accused him of making up excuses to get out of his discovery obligations. “‘The dog ate my homework.’ ‘I have to wash my hair.’ ‘I can’t go out, I’m sick.’ Since the dawn of time, people have made up excuses to avoid doing things they do not want to do.” Yep, that’s our Rudy!
He’s also being sued in Colorado by Eric Coomer, former Director of Product Security and Strategy at Dominion Voting Systems, for false, fantastical ramblings such as:
“[B]y the way, the Coomer character, who is close to Antifa, took off all of his social media. Ah, ah, but we kept it, we’ve got it. The man is a vicious, vicious man [...] and he specifically says that they’re going to fix this election. This is real. It is not made up. [T]here’s nobody here that engages in fantasies. I’ve tried a hundred cases. I’ve prosecuted some of the most dangerous criminals in the world. I know crimes. I can smell them. You don’t have to smell this one. I can prove it to you eighteen different ways.”
And he’s being sued by his former assistant, Noelle Dunphy, who’s seeking at least $10 million for 22 counts of sexual abuse and unpaid wages. He was in court for that in October, ranting, raving and screaming so much that New York Supreme Court Justice Nicholas Moyne muted his microphone “to protect you from yourself at this time.”
The details in Dunphy’s lawsuit have everything: a sexualized Margaret Thatcher, American-flag hotpants, Viagra-fueled Bill Clinton fantasies, speculation on Jewish men’s dongers, and Trump selling pardons out of the back of a pickup truck for $2 million. Just go read it yourself, if you want to crap a book on how to retch.
And Rudy’s been indicted in the Arizona fake electors scheme, where Trump is his unindicted co-conspirator number one. And in Georgia, though that case has been kicked out to an ice floe for reassignment to another prosecutor on the fortyeth of never.
So now Rudy may attend all of the inaugural events, only to discover that he and Vinny are seated in the alley sharing a plate of spaghetti while whatever Trump billionaire best friend has written the biggest check gets to sit next to him. At least maybe he and his chram will be out of our nightmares for a little while, until his next court date, anyway!
Until then!
[New York Times archive link/ Daily Beast archive link/ New York Magazine archive link (Dunphy hearing)]
OT: Tramp is afraid of the cold.
PatriotTakes 🇺🇸 @patriottakes.bsky.social
Trump messed with Jimmy Carter’s flag and now he has to hold his inauguration inside.
what's the over/under on him defaming them again?