12 Wonkette Stories THEY Don't Want You To Read!

Who is this they anyway?

Hello evening Wonkette friends! I am dicking around with trying new ways to get you to click more things. Tonight let’s leave our fancy little embeds and just do this, which is somehow MORE work!

Things to read and news and nonsense and whatnot, it’s your morning tabs!

Tim Scott seems to think workers do not “work.” Tim Scott's Had It With Lazy Bums Who Build Our Cars, Keep Planes From Crashing

This lady dumb. Judge Boxwine Knows What Causes MURDERRRRRR, It Is Participation Trophies

Did you watch? Was it good? Both its? LIVE: Choose Your Own Adventure! Merrick Garland Or IRONMAN Secretary Mayor Pete?

Sure sure, why not. Guess Ron DeSantis Running For President Against Nancy Pelosi We Mean Kevin McCarthy Now

Yay! WaPo SHOCKER: Clean Energy Is Clean, Actually! (Yes, Including EVs)

This one was a real stumper, and I don’t mean Trump’s dick :( Was Trump Telling Aide To Lie When He Told Her To Lie? New York Times Helps ABC With The Hard Questions

Somebody put that poor old horse out to pasture. A Metaphor That Applies To Joe Klein's Latest Newsletter: F*ck Off

WHIPLASH. Pennsylvania Dems Re-Retake State House In Third Special Election This Year

Oh no what will become of the republic. Most Important Issue Facing Congress: Stopping John Fetterman's Body Double From Wearing Shorts At Senate

NOPE. Cassidy Hutchinson Says Rudy Celebrated Jan. 6 By Groping Her. Sounds About Right.

YES. Trump Wetting His Britches Over Going To Prison, Wearing Jumpsuit, Being Utterly Alone Forever

Well okay, if Shy was still doing these newsletters, this would have a theme and some jokes and whatnot, what ever happened to that guy? SHYYYYYYY.

Okay bye.