Trump Wanders Around Japan, Tells ‘Em About Wet Magnets
Not gonna stop asking questions about his dementia anytime soon.
We think it’s becoming clear, especially with events of late, that all of Donald Trump’s blather about Joe Biden’s autopen is, as usual, projection. (Related: James “Pigfuck McGee” Comer at the House Oversight Committee is now asking the Department of Justice to investigate every single action Joe Biden ever took with the autopen, as if all presidents don’t use those all day every day.)
This week has been full of tells, for instance Grandpa Sundown on Air Force One bragging about the results of his dementia test, the one where he (allegedly) picked out which one was “giraffe” on the first try, and then tagged AOC and Jasmine Crockett and dared them to take the “Are You Smarter Than Somebody With Late Stage Alzheimer’s?” challenge.
He just casually mentioned there, too, that he had an MRI, which he (allegedly) also got a perfect score on, the highest score in the history of MRIs, nobody has ever seen anything like it.
One of the most glaring moments on Trump’s Asia trip was when he was talking to a group of captive troops and his brain got lost babbling about magnets:
“You know, the new thing is magnets. So instead of using hydraulic that can be hit by lightning and it’s fine. You take a little glass of water, you drop it on magnets, I don’t know what’s going to happen. So, you know, the elevators come up in the new carriers — I think I’m going to change it, by the way — they have magnets. Every tractor has hydraulic, every excavator, every excavating machine of any kind has hydraulic. But somebody decided to use magnets. I’m going to sign an executive order. When we build aircraft carriers, it’s steam for the catapults and it’s hydraulic for the elevators. We’ll never have a problem. Everybody agrees. But, ahh, these people in Washington.”
He was trying to talk about the systems on aircraft carriers for launching aircraft. Like most subjects, it’s pretty clear Trump has no idea what he’s talking about.
There were probably guys at that naval base, in that audience, who know all about aircraft carriers and launching aircraft. That’s gotta be weird for them, listening to shit like this.
You take a little glass of water, you drop it on magnets, I don’t know what’s going to happen.
Fucking magnets, how do they work? (Well, not like that.)
A lot of the headlines that came out of that address to the troops were about Stupid Hitler announcing his intentions for his police state, telling them he was going to use the military to attack American cities no matter whether people like it or not. He bragged about his Caribbean boat murders, part of the Latin America mission that his shitfaced Defense secretary is now forcing military members to sign NDAs about. That’s weird, because military officials are already constrained in what sort of information they’re allowed to share about ongoing operations, and NDAs are more the kind of thing MAGA types pressure women accusing them of rape into signing. Trump, reality TV star who grabs them by the pussy, has, of course, always been big on NDAs.
All of that is alarming, and should obviously be taken seriously. The president is an unhinged madman, a dictator with a mini-boner and a black heart full of vengeful hatred for everyone he thinks has ever wronged him.
But, importantly, emphasis on the unhinged here.
Here is Trump yapping anew that he ended eight wars, with the added flourish this time that “no president that we know has ever ended any war.”
No president has ended any war? Reckon that’d be news to Andrew Johnson and Teddy Roosevelt and Woodrow Wilson and Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter and Harry S. Truman and … Joe Biden. Fuck it, we’ll add George Washington in there too. This is reaching beyond ludicrous now.
Donald Trump is a pathological liar, but one gets the sense here that the words coming out of his mouth lately are more than that now, they’re taking on a life of their own, and one imagines he says some of the things he says because he wants to know what cool things the president did that day, and this is what people around him are telling him.
For the record, needless to say, Donald Trump has ended zero wars. He had ended zero wars before whatever clownshow photo-op they orchestrated in Israel and Gaza to try to con the Nobel committee, and it’s becoming abundantly clear he didn’t end that war either.
He also claimed during that speech, as he has before, that Joe Biden says he used to be a pilot. Joe Biden has never said he used to be a pilot.
And so forth. In many ways, a totally normal Trump speech. His condition has been progressing like this for a while.
And then there is all the footage coming out of this trip of Trump wandering around in Tokyo, confused, lost and saluting the Japanese flag. This first one has musical accompaniment added to it:
This is the dictator ruling America with his little bitty bruised iron paws right now.
When Trump was bragging about (allegedly) acing the dementia test he took, he claimed, as he always does, that the questions toward the end get really hard, that nobody can answer them, but he can. “Those are very hard — they’re really aptitude tests, I guess, in a certain way.” No, they are not. They are intended to be very easy for anyone whose brain is not currently broken and/or infected with late-stage syphilis.
And no, people do not have regular MRIs. Not even presidents. People who have had strokes recently have MRIs. (Reference recent pictures of one side of Trump’s face drooping.) Dementia and Alzheimer’s patients have MRIs.
All of this as people around Trump are really trying to egg on the idea that he’s going to seize an unconstitutional third term in 2028, even as he himself tries to pretend he understands he can’t do that. Certain people, like Steve Bannon, are snapping like vicious little bitches when other people, like Mike Johnson, suggest Trump cannot run for a third term.
“Polly Pockets, you’ve got no say so in this, OK? Just shut up and sit off in the corner. You’re running the Duma right now. Just go over and run the Duma. We don’t — not interested in what you have to say on any topic, much less this topic, OK.”
Said Bannon in Johnson’s general direction, as if to say if Johnson gets out of line again, he’s going to dissolve him in a bathtub, not that Steve Bannon would know anything about anything like that.
Here’s a guess as to what’s going on here: Trump has severe and rapidly progressing dementia and/or Alzheimer’s, everybody around him knows it, it’s reaching the point where they can’t easily hide it anymore, and many people in his circle are taking advantage of that. They’re happy for him to tear down the White House — it’s his “main priority” right now, said White House Nazi Barbie Karoline Leavitt — because it makes him feel safe. They’re allowing him to turn the White House into a cheap approximation of his already miserably cheap-looking Mar-a-Lago, so that he can hospice in place when the time comes, and when he asks if he’s in Palm Beach, they’ll say “Yes, sir, you’re in Palm Beach,” and they’ll be big strong men with tears in their eyes.
Meanwhile, Stephen Miller is the real president, just like Stephen Miller is also the real attorney general and Corey Lewandowski is the real DHS Nazi Barbie.
Why would they stage an elaborate Weekend at Bernie’s act? Well, quite simply, because there’s nobody else in their movement who can step into the shoes of MAGA cult leader. JD Vance repels all normal people, who instinctively reach for the phone to call the cops and/or throw drapes over their couches when they see him coming. Stephen Miller is literally undead, and people treat him as such.
Uday and Qusay? How far down this list are we going to keep going while we say “no”?
But for whatever reason, MAGA loves this conman who still has actually never commanded a majority vote of the American people, who does weird dick-jerking dances at people.
They just have to keep Trump wandering the halls of the White House and rubbing his minidick against the gold parts, and they have to keep the Epstein Files from ever seeing the light of day, perhaps underneath what used to be the East Wing, because what is in there is so vile and disgusting it will take down the president and his entire movement.
And they have to let him come out and do speeches for the troops, for the MAGA pigs out in the hinterlands, let him jerk two dicks at once while “YMCA” plays. Maybe once in a while let him sundown for 30 to 45 minutes while all his favorite Andrew Lloyd Webber hits from the 1980s play. (Dementia patients respond well to the music of their younger years.)
Will anybody notice how far he’s deteriorating, how fast he is aging, how fragile he looks? Or is everybody so used to seeing him babble about windmills and raking the forest and how he turned on a GREAT BIG GIGANTIC FAUCET in Northern California and Los Angeles was saved, that they’re gambling people won’t really pick up on it?
If we have it wrong, surely the White House can release the information to prove it, just like if Michael Wolff is wrong about Trump and Jeffrey Epstein working as the “pussy committee” to get young girls for Prince Andrew — wouldn’t that be child sex trafficking if they were underage? — a foolproof way to prove it would be to release the full Epstein Files. (Mike Johnson should bring the House back in session so they can vote to release them and thereby restore Donald Trump’s good name!)
They don’t seem to want to do either of those things. Weird.
Maybe Jake Tapper can look into it sometime.
Want to read more Evan than just what’s at Wonkette? Visit The Moral High Ground and subscribe to it!
Follow me on Instagram!
And on BlueSky!
And on Facebook!














Dems, repeat after me: "It is pathetic to see this sick, old, clearly confused, likely dying old man being trotted out like a trained monkey by his Project 2025 handlers to play President. It is clear he lacks the cognitive capacity for the job."
https://bsky.app/profile/cptdoomdc.bsky.social/post/3m4ascf55ps2l
Trump always sounds like the oral book report of the kid who didn't read the book