We know it’s mostly just a coincidence of timing, but we don’t mind at least imagining that Tuesday’s Blue Tsunami not only washed that MAGA right out of our hair, but that it also had something to do with Friday’s announcement by Elon Musk that Tesla will soon end production of the Cybertruck (link is to Car and Driver, not Elon’s Nazi Factory).
Musk said in a tweet that production of Tesla’s money-losing stainless steel loser-chariot would wind down “around the middle of next year” to make room for his Texas Gigafactory to ramp up production of the self-driving “Cybercab.” Sure, that’s the reason, not the uncomfortable fact that Cybercuck sales never came anywhere close to Musk’s goal of 250,000 units a year. Instead, Tesla only sold 38,965 ClusterTrucks in 2024, the first year of production. Sales dropped to 20,237 CyberAzteks in 2025, and in the first three cyberquarters of 2026, Musk could only unload 11,586 Incel Caminos. (No, Musk didn’t mention the vanishingly low sales in his announcement.)
Musk also didn’t say the elections factored into the decision to stop making the finger-eating e-behemoth after just three years. But we do know he’s a very sensitive boy who’s undoubtedly feeling a bit of regret for blowing half a billion dollars trying to scare voters. The inevitable tell-all stories from inside the Muskosphere, the investor freakouts, and the performative stunts of Musk fans desperate to buy the last few TrumpsterDumpsters will likely be hilarious.
Democrats probably can’t take credit for the collapse of Musk’s Wankpanzer folly — Elon made his brand toxic all on his own. But the 120th Congress should waste no time getting to work investigating all the sleazy shit Musk has done in the Trump years, particularly in his brief reign as Donald Trump’s co-president. We need an Oversight-a-Palooza.
As Robyn discussed the day after the election, a bipartisan group of members of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee is already looking into the Wall Street Journal’s October report (gift link) that Musk himself ordered the slowdown of data transmission over the military version of Starlink used by Ukraine’s military. The committee has sent letters to Musk, the Trump administration, and private businesses advising them to preserve documents that will be requested once the new session of Congress is sworn in.
That’s a pretty good starting point, and come January, House and Senate committees will be able to back up those document requests with subpoenas — and if the administration refuses to comply, there’s one more count in impeachment charges for the justice-obstructing rats.
Oh, and there’s so much MORE to investigate. Hearing rooms for both houses of Congress will be very busy looking at Elon’s businesses and at all the other rot the Trump II regime has gotten itself into. As Sen. Elissa Slotkin (D-Michigan) recently made clear, this time accountability has to come for Trump’s many enablers in the federal bureaucracy, and for any co-conspirators in the private sector.
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Beyond Elon’s Starlink fuckery, there are plenty of avenues for congressional investigation. Some are particular to Musk and his DOGE brownshirts, but we wouldn’t want him to feel singled out. Other creepy tech bros who may have helped Trump do crimes should also think twice before destroying any evidence.
Happily, in 2025, Sen. Elizabeth Warren compiled a brief overview of Musk’s DOGE misrule, which would be a great starting point for investigating the creepy little fucker. We need a clearer understanding of the many likely conflicts of interest resulting from his efforts to slash government agencies while also holding government contracts that added to his wealth. Before Trump was returned to power, the report notes, “Musk’s companies faced at least $2.37 billion in potential liability from pending agency enforcement actions,” most of which quietly went away. How exactly did that come about?
And hey, while Congress is looking at that, maybe one or more of the committees that oversee the Defense Department should look into why the Pentagon’s inspector general’s office decided not to investigate the Starlink slowdown, either.
The Warren Report (oh, is that name taken?) points out that Musk and his army of creepy interns simply ignored longstanding norms and procedures as they axed federal agency staff and operations. Beyond that, Musk also very likely
engaged in action that may have violated the statutory prohibition regarding federal employees’ participation in particular matters in which a government official has a financial interest, laws against bribery and gratuities, or the regulations prohibiting use of one’s government position for private gain.
In the 130 days Musk was a “special government employee,” his net worth grew by over $100 billion, which seems like rather a lot. Warren’s report breaks down the muskfuckery into several categories, including the slashing of agencies with regulatory and investigatory power over Musk businesses; policy changes like NASA shifting business to SpaceX and incorporating Musk’s xAI into government computer systems; and the use of federal resources to promote his businesses, like Trump’s one-day conversion of the White House into a Tesla sales lot.
Shortly before the election, the Democracy Defenders Fund issued a separate report building on Warren’s work which detailed a whole lot more Muskorruption to investigate as well.
We also need Congress to investigate exactly what happened when DOGE went hoovering up Americans’ personal data from federal agencies. Draining and copying all the data was often the first thing the DOGEsters did as soon as they got through the door. Musk’s data attacks on the IRS and Social Security need to be the subject of targeted investigation, because how the hell was any of it even the least bit legal? (It wasn’t!)
Here’s Rachel Maddow’s detective story, from Monday before the election, laying out that the datasuck was part of Trump’s effort to fuck over the midterm elections with an illegal federal list of voters, never mind that elections are a state responsibility.
Subpoenas of records and of the participants in that scheme, please.
And hell, while we’re at it, how about a Homeland Security Committee investigation into Elon’s fishy pursuit of US citizenship? There’s almost certainly more there there than in Ilhan Omar’s rumpus room.
When Trump’s DOJ refuses to act on any criminal referrals congressional committees make, the investigative work will be ready for action if Democrats regain the presidency in 2029. In the meantime, just publishing the results of the investigations will get them into the public record for all to see. Americans can then organize to demand accountability, and where appropriate, state prosecutors can bring charges, even if Trump grants Musk a pardon for any federal crimes.
Starting now, Congress should investigate Musk’s sleazy operations. Then at some point in 2029, refer him to the DOJ for prosecution (and to get restitution from his companies if they’re found to have broken the law), and finally deport the motherfucker already, either back to South Africa or to Mars.
[Car and Driver / Elon Musk’s 130 Days in the Trump Administration (E. Warren, 2025)
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ALSO TOO: Yr Fall Wonkette Book Club is rolling right along! We’re reading Bill McKibben’s 2025 bestseller Here Comes the Sun (Wonkette affiliate link), all about the clean energy revolution and how it can get us out of our climate fix and even improve society somewhat (if we do it fast and do it right.)
We had a great first meeting, and this coming Sunday (November 8) we’ll be reading Section Two, “There’s No Reason Not To Do This” in which McKibben knocks down all the myths about how we “can’t” transition away from fossil fuels. (Spoiler: They’re mostly propaganda.) More here!
I vote for both. Prison first, then deportation.
Confiscate all his money, and THEN deport him to South Africa.