Archive - Wonkette

Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week’s Cocktails, The Bar Crawl Drinks!

Ready for all the drinks?

48 mins ago • Matthew Hooper

All Good Things ... In Loving Nerdy Memory Of Patrick Stewart, 1940-2026

‘Live now. Make now always the most precious time. Now will never come again.’

2 hrs ago • Doktor Zoom

Vivek Ramaswamy Mysteriously Pulls Pro-Pedophile Ad That Was Working So Well For Him

Wait — did people not like watching a mother who abandoned her kid for a pedophile trash said kid in a commercial?

3 hrs ago • Robyn Pennacchia

Secretary Brainworms: ‘Let Them Eat Wolverine Peptides!’

And meat cake, probably. Made from raw meat.

5 hrs ago • Robyn Pennacchia

Trump Having A Real Bad Time Ahead Of Midterms, LOL

Here, have a healthy dose of my favorite medicine, schadenfreude!

7 hrs ago • Brooke Binkowski

Trump Canceling Rallies Because He’s Sleepy/Senile/Needs To Poop/Going To Lose Anyway/Everybody Hates Him?

Maybe it’s because he’s sick of winning.

8 hrs ago • Evan Hurst

The Cult. Tabs, Fri., Oct. 30, 2026

Morning news roundup!

10 hrs ago • Rebecca Schoenkopf

Yes, We Can, Dolores Huerta, 1930-2026. Yes, We Did.

Oct 29 • Doktor Zoom

We Don’t Know How To Tell You This, But Donald Trump MIGHT BE A Sex Criminal!!1!

House Democrats dropped a bombshell report this week. Old news probably, right?

Oct 29 • Brooke Binkowski

New York Times Catches Alaska Dems Being Hilarious Motherf*ckers, RED-HANDED!

The Times hasn’t had this much of a hard-on to fuck a Democrat since the last time they fucked a Democrat.

Oct 29 • Evan Hurst

Tell Your Young Men To Care About Sh*t

How about some good faith, instead of bad?

Oct 29 • Denny Carter

Barack Obama Invites Anyone Upset About His Trump Cheesecake Factory Joke To Cry More

Throw in some tan suit tears while you’re at it.

Oct 29 • Evan Hurst

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