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Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, Matcha Sake Tonic!
Very Asian, very green, very tasty.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
2,786
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THE SPLIT: Chapter One
In which we meet our heroine and her dainty little gun.
All the rest of THE SPLIT!
All of them Katie
Recommendations
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Noahpinion
Noahpinion
Noah Smith
Boneless Wings: Now Neither Wings Nor Boneless
The Ohio Supreme Court determined a man should have expected a bone in his *boneless* wings.
 • 
Robyn Pennacchia
502
NY DA: Covering Up Boning A Porn Star Not An Official Presidential Act, ACTUALLY
Trump can make sad eyes all he wants, but those NY 34 felony counts probably aren’t going anywhere
 • 
Marcie Jones
434
Laughing, Non-Procreative Sex, Rainbows And Kittens Are Top GOP Concerns. Could Sunshine And Puppies Be Next?
Why do they hate everything nice?
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Robyn Pennacchia
816
Burn It All Down. Burn It Down To The Ground
Pull up a rug, it's Wonkette storytime.
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Shypixel
408
Which Libraries Are Under Siege Today? (All Of Them, Katie)
Texas lawman really wanted to arrest librarians; Idaho libraries and parents fight back.
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Doktor Zoom
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The latest from
Matthew Hooper
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, Matcha Sake Tonic!
Robyn Pennacchia
Boneless Wings: Now Neither Wings Nor Boneless
Marcie Jones
NY DA: Covering Up Boning A Porn Star Not An Official Presidential Act, ACTUALLY
Shypixel
Burn It All Down. Burn It Down To The Ground
Evan Hurst
Trump Officially Pulls Out Of Deba-WK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK!
Rebecca Schoenkopf
The First Girl Emerges. Tabs, Fri., July 26, 2024
Brooke Binkowski
Guess News Organizations Shouldn't Have Fired All Their Fact-Checkers, Huh?
Liz Dye
Oh Honey, Are You Sure You Want To Send This Takedown Demand To Your Wonkette?
Dominic Gwinn
Kamala Harris Goes To Milwaukee to Show How It's Done
Gary Legum
Hello! I, Vladimir Putin, Have Nothing To Do With Joe Biden's Retirement. Pinky Swear!
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Featured

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Guess News Organizations Shouldn't Have Fired All Their Fact-Checkers, Huh?
Media really fucked the couch on this one.
 • 
Brooke Binkowski
1,275
Old Handsome Joe Biden Peaces Out
All hail the hero!
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
9,310
Whom Did Your Wonkette See Monday At The RNC?
Gross!
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
372
So Is This A Good Time to Talk About A Shadowy Right-Wing Population Control Conspiracy Group?
Just kidding. It's always a good time.
 • 
Brooke Binkowski
238
Wonkette
Wonkette
Wonkette is filthy, hilarious, liberal news. YOU CAN HANDLE THE TRUTH!
For Some Reason, CNN Only Now Saying Economic Recovery Is 'Historic'
Took them historically long to get there.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
613
Kim Davis Is BACK Y'all And She's Coming For Your Marriage And Maybe Your Sex!
Other people having sex and birth control violate her religious liberties too!
 • 
Marcie Jones
477
Trump Officially Pulls Out Of Deba-WK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK!
Whatever Chrissy Teigen said about Trump, we forget.
 • 
Evan Hurst
497
The First Girl Emerges. Tabs, Fri., July 26, 2024
Morning news roundup!
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
956
Top posts
Joe Biden And George Stephanopoulos Jes' A Couple A Fellas, Havin' A Chat
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1,972
Trump Picks Unlikeable Pile Of Human Butthair As Running Mate, Excellent Choice!
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Tim Scott Quoted Fannie Lou Hamer At A Trump Rally And Now I Want To Punch My Fist Through A Wall
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Jordan Peterson Mad About Crosswalks Now, As One Is
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We Never Send Out This Newsletter

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Yes We Updated Our Superhero Kamala Shirts For 2024!
Not the stickers though, we bought those wholesale.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
255
Why Yes We Do Have This Kamala Shirt Ready To Go
It's clean and elegant and you'll buy four.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
3
New! FINALLY Improved! The Wonkette Bazaar!
Hunt down your 2024 gear, bring it back to your cave.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
STICK IT ... TO ME?
That's terrible, Rebecca.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
2
MUGS/SHOTS!
ISWIDT.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
TATTOO YOU!
Look at that doll.
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
4
Kamala Harris Ad Very Good! Trump 'Fox & Friends' Appearance Very Person Woman Shark Battery Hannibal Lecter!
Compare and contrast.
 • 
Evan Hurst
4,238
Guess News Organizations Shouldn't Have Fired All Their Fact-Checkers, Huh?
Media really fucked the couch on this one.
 • 
Brooke Binkowski
1,275
LIVE: Press Briefing! Time To Come Clean, White House!
Today on WonkTV!
 • 
Evan Hurst
296
Joe Biden Should Be F*cking Proud
Another one to clip and send to the grandkids!
 • 
Doktor Zoom
572

Nice Time

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Is Joe Biden Too Old To Stop Methane Leaks? Washington Post Demands Answers!
Why yes, this $850 million grant program to fight emissions is another part of the Inflation Reduction Act.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
274
Michigan Homeowners Can Tell HOAs To STFU, GTFO. At Least When It Comes To Rooftop Solar
This is a trend, even!
 • 
Doktor Zoom
370
Climate Roundup: Extreme Heat Protections For Workers! And Some Other Stuff.
One of those mixed bag days.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
205
How Is Joe Biden's Big Effing Climate Bill Already Helping?
Shoulda just named it The Big Fucking Climate Act.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
171
Oh Honey, Are You Sure You Want To Send This Takedown Demand To Your Wonkette?
:/
 • 
Liz Dye
 and 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
787
LIVE: Kamala Harris Talking To Teachers Union, Like A Common Liberal!
Today on WonkTV!
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Evan Hurst
129
Trump Thought Disabled People Too Expensive, Maybe Should Just Die
Including his own nephew.
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Evan Hurst
422

Recipe Hub

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Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, Matcha Sake Tonic!
Very Asian, very green, very tasty.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
2,430
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Whiskey Rebellion!
Bar's closed today, or rather bar's open today!
 • 
Matthew Hooper
6,404
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Kalimotxo!
Because lowbrow sangria is just plain awesome.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
4,561
The Top 2025 Projects For Hurting America! Tabs, Mon., July 8, 2024
Morning news roundup!
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
823
Those Cakes We Like … Have A Serious Chocolate Addiction
The temperature is too high for baking right now.
 • 
CakesWeLike
514
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Slow Mojito!
Breathe. Relax. Drink rum.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
1,889
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Sagebrush Old Fashioned!
A bourbon classic, redone with the spirit of summer.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
3,546
Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Perfect Margarita!
Last boat to Margaritaville, boarding now.
 • 
Matthew Hooper
3,006

New Years Eve

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Your 2023 Legislative Badass Is ... Not A Legislator, It's Joe Biden!
Congress barely legislated, but when it did, Joe won.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
5,400
Wonkette’s 2023 Legislative Shitheel Is/Was His Teenage Son’s No-Porning Accountabili-buddy, Isn’t That Sick?
Fuuuucking creep.
 • 
Evan Hurst
260
Wonkette's 2023 Sexiest Person Alive Is ... The UAW's Shawn Fain!
Yeah he is.
 • 
Robyn Pennacchia
382
2023 In Memoriam: Good People Who Are Dead
Celebrating just a few humans who passed away in 2023, but ONLY THE GOOD ONES.
 • 
Sara Benincasa
272
2023 Was Earth's Hottest Year Ever, AND The Climate Outlook Is Finally Improving
Our money is very much on Hope.
 • 
Doktor Zoom
219
2023 In The World's Last Website!
It's US! Wonkette!
 • 
Rebecca Schoenkopf
452
2023: James Comer’s Year Of Looking For Hunter Biden’s Penis But Never Finding It
No, this isn't Legislative Shitheel.
 • 
Evan Hurst
334
2023, The Year George Santos Truly Became President
He's still less pathetic than Kevin McCarthy.
 • 
Stephen Robinson
239
2023: The Year Tommy Tuberville Fucked The Military And Saved Zero (0) Unborned Babies, What A Dumbass
This is not legislative shitheel.
 • 
Evan Hurst
388
2023, When Kevin McCarthy Was House Speaker For A Few Months
Farewell, Kevin, you won’t be missed.
 • 
Stephen Robinson
200
2023, The Year Congress Did Jack Shit
Pitiful, just pitiful.
 • 
Stephen Robinson
177
2023's Scammiest Psychic Swindlers
Don't give your money to people who claim to have magic powers!
 • 
Robyn Pennacchia
260
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