Sitemap - 2007 - Wonkette

The Wide Stance That Changed American History

Quick! Last Minute New Years Plans!

Bloomberg, Bipartisanship Aren't The Answer

Homosexuality Is a Sin, and Huckabee's a Sinner

Free Abortions for All!

Wonkette Chooses First Hispanic Vice Person of the Year

2007: Awkwardest Condiyear EVER

What a Totally Rad Year for Bush!

Use Me, Use Me, Go On and Use Me

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Stage Set for Alan Keyes Landslide in Iowa

Extended Laughter Directed at Ron Paul

Dear John,

So The NYT Hires Bill Kristol, and We're Intolerant?

The Zardaris' Busy Weekend

Saddam the Beloved

NYT Op-Ed Page Dissolves Into Stinking Heap of Neocon Shit

March of the Paultards

Creepy Grainy Video

You Can Go Home Again, If You're White

Wonkette Sponsors Would Totally Have Posted Those Carnage Pictures

The Way of the World

Metro Operators Whoring for Presents

France Debates Naughty Pictures

Crisis at Paultard Central!

The Lesser of Two Evils?

Someone Tell the UN Spider Man Isn't Real

Mitt Romney Fighting Two-Headed Beast of Losingness

Aw, Look! He's Working!

Were You a Top Five Commenter of the Year?

Rudi Iz Teh Fun-nest!!1!

Iowa Night Shift Managers Feel Same Disdain for Caucuses That We Do

DC Gossip Columnists Need to Get Back to Work

Infamous Butter Cow Becomes Butter Obama, Finally

Believe What They Tell You

Who's the Biggest Blowhard?

James Carville and Mary Matalin Live in Pink Hellhole

Mike Huckabee Was Really Shooting for Reporters

I Saw Mommy Kissing Cartoon Violence

John McCain: Dying Print Journalism's Choice for America

U.S. Strategy to Ensure British Cooperation

Internment's Not Just a Shitty Hill Gig, Huckaboo

Can Someone Tell Andrew Sullivan to Shut Up?

What They Sort of Showed You

Take Wolf Blitzer With You

Huckabee Takes Money From Satan Blah Blah

Oh Yeah, The Thing About Ron Paul Being Racist

EPA Throws in the Towel

Bhutto Leaves Grand Legacy of Slightly Altering Iowa Caucus Scenario

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Who Wouldn't Prefer Obama for New Year's?

McCain Might Be Above Whoring His Kids for Political Advantage

Edwards Thinks He's Really Cool Because He Talked to Musharraf Today

How Did We Arrive at This Point?

Bill Richardson Thinks Pakistan Should Completely Recreate Itself, Like, Now

Yeah She Died, But What Does This Mean for Republicans in Iowa?

Before and After the Assassination, in Photos

Vote For Wonkette's Person and Vice Person of the Year!

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Nancy Pelosi's Staff Party Turns Into Real Shitshow

Teh Huckbeez Need Money

Pizza Hut Ad Smears Dennis Kucinich

Fox News Has Most Balanced Election Coverage, According to Fox News-supported Research Center

An Analysis of CNN.com on This, the Morning Bhutto Has Died

Finally, Clean Needles Come to DC

Classic Dystopian Sci-Fi Book Influenced Bush Stem Cell Policy

Mobilize the Fleet

Monster Demon Wrestler Endorses Paul

Bhutto Assassinated

Idiots and the Idiots Who Admire Them

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Huck's Hunting Interview

Carla, Honey, Watch Out!

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Ron Paul to Strictly Construct Constitution to His Needs

Important Things Still Overlooked

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A Douchebag In Kansas Engages in Douchebaggery

Duh, It Was Dean's Idea First

The LA Times Got Scooped by Christmas

Sharpton Talks About His Role "in American Life"

Chris Matthews Thinks a Barack Win in Iowa Could Solve Every Problem Ever

Please Remove Your Fillings Prior to Death. Thanks.

Iraq? Haven't Thought About That In Years

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The Foreigns Will Not Be Getting Off Their Rats' Asses

Demrats Keep Senate Open for Seconds to Avoid Massive Evildoing

Indians Taking Our Jobs, Mimicking Our Obesity

Texas Kills Prisoners Like It's A Job

McCain Wingnuts All Over Iraq, Reagan

Edwards Is Totally My Ex-Boyfriend

Ron Paul a Massive Jesuser

"Disagreeing" with Pelosi

There Is Nothing We Can Do

You Can't Fucking Go Home

Politics, Like Family, Can Be Embarrassing

For the Holidays, Cheap Weed Gets Cheaper

There Is No Privacy Anymore

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Rhode Island Can Suck It

Can the MSM Write Anecdotally About Gentrification Without Being Ungodly Racist?

Christmas Comes Early for Jews This Year

Ron Paul Advocates Government Slave Purchasing

Condi 'n' Kozy Sitting in a Tree

Ron Paul A Hypocritical Retarded Dick on 'Meet the Press'

Bush To Check Out This 'World' Everyone's Whining About

Oddsmakers Still Banking on That Loser Hillary

No One Drinks Alone in Des Moines

NH Paper Undorses Romney, Earns Our Respect

Barack Buys Bill Clinton Domain Names?

Vagina Monologues

Pull Out, Or Don't, Whatever

Another Day, Another Delay

Megan Carpentier Will Not Waterboard Wonkette's Sponsors

Putin Overcompensating Again

That Asshole Huckabee Takes National Lead For First Time

Huckabee on Jamie Lynn Spears' Pregnancy

Rufus Wainwright Show To Be New Janky Sweater Party

Progressive Taxation

Alan Keyes Can Define My Reality, Alright

Tucker Carlson Tries To Get Ron Paul Laid

Larry Craig Has a New Cruuuuuush!

Morgan Freeman Spotted Narrating a Documentary, or Something

Do. Not. Want.

Israel's Incompentent Interior Ministry

Joe Biden Channels His Druid Mystics

If Gitmo's "Too Nice," Then Why Don't You Go Live There?

Condi: We Do Too Have Friends!

John McCain's Xmas Card a Massive Buzzkill

California Solves Its Prison Problem!

Larry Craig Has Gay Sex With Himself

'Twenty Dollar' Bob Resurfaces in Rolling Stone

Cartoon Violence Hearts Teh Huckbeez

Megan Carpentier Waterboarded Me, and It Was Torture

Facebook Will Kill You, Your Children, Your Children's Children

Ron Paul Poses with Neo Nazi BFFs

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Johnson, Staff Disagree and Johnson Wins

Can't Keep A Good Earmark Down

Stories That Really Shouldn't Be

Gonzo, like Ashcroft, a Hero

Foot-in-Mouth Disease Crosses Border

Rudy Released!

Police Mace New Orleans' Remaining Black People

Paultard Blimp Impossible to See?

AP Forgets Ben Johnson Saga In Year's Top Stories

Tancredo Exits Stage Right - UPDATED

McCain and A Telecom Bill

Dear Al Qaeda...

WaPo Continues To Be Free Online

Further Insight Into Bush's Advice

Your Axis of Fun Sweater Party Photos!

Lakota Will Be Way Way Better Than Dakota

It's WALNUTS! Time Now

Political Ads Didn't Always Blow Goats

Romney Will Save Your Children

FEC Issues Matching Funds, Hobo Candidates Rejoice

Well, He Felt Like He Saw It

Tom DeLay Gets Friends Shitfaced

Secret Service May Shoot Clintons in the Foot

Which Republican is Bush Secretly Dissing?

Poll: Which Republican Food Will You Eat This Holiday Season?

David Gregory Rocks Out to Mary J

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The EPA Is On It

A Little Competition

He Doesn't Need Your Flyover State

Republicans Still Looking for Decent Candidate

All Shapes, Size and Contribution Levels

Tax Cuts for Christmas!

If You've Got a Christmas Ad, Now's the Time

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NYT Changes Subhead After Perino's Bitching

Someone Had a Dream

Jamie Lynn Spears: Not In DC, But Pregnant

Rudy's Other Embarrassing Christmas Ad

Romney: Got God Or Just The Crazy?

Larry Craig Gets Gay Swagger Back at White House

EEOB Inferno Revealed!

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Rudy Goes Wild About Fruitcake

'Elp, 'Elp, I'm Bein' Oppressed

Time Fires Major Neocon Douches

Shocker: White House Pissed at NYT

Joe Scarborough And Friend Ridicule Huckabee's Jesusery

When Deer Attack, One Man Attacks Back

All Iraqis to America: Please Go Away

John Edwards Impregnates Kevin Bacon

Romney's Political Pandering Pardoning Policy

The Foreigns Have A 'Magic Formula' For You

John Bolton Hates Bush for Listening to a Girl

Mike Huckabee Loses One Major Redneck Vote

Paultard Blimp Headed Northbound

Updated: Executive Office Building Fire

Get Over It

... Putin?

Enquirer Reports: Rielle with Someone's Child [Updated]

Super Mini Homo Geniuses

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Who Will Be Time's Person of the Year? Why Are We Asking?

Just Don't Look Him In The Eye

They're Not Sayin', They're Just Sayin'

Best Paultard Spam Of The Week

Drudge, Meet Your Future

Hillary Humanizes Herself with Bobbing Head

DC Continues To Get No Love From Congress

Congress Wiping Away Entire Agenda For Steroid Legislation

Blackwater Murders the NYT's Dog!

Last King of (Almost) Scotland

Chuck's Got a List, and He Ain't Checking It Twice

Reason Mag's Holiday Party Was [Clever Play on "Reason"]

Reid Still Searching for Leadership Abilities

Judge to Bush: I Read The News

Ron Paul Issues a Merry "Fuck You" to Mike Huckabee

Senate Notices: Byrd Is Old

"Larry Craig" and "Dude Ranch" Used in Same Sentence

New Hillary Website Shows She's Nice To Certain Friends

Gavin Wants Your Soda!

DSCC Donates Coal to Mitch McConnell

Casinos Good, Online Casinos Still Bad

Ron Paul Just Wants To Go Home

George Bush Sr. Will Obviously Be Dead by 2009

This Damn Election

You Make Some Good Points But Otherwise Shut It

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Men Stray, Women Wreck

Hillary, Can We Talk?

Huckabee's Other Son Loves Him Some Porno

A Very Janky AOF Christmas For All

Edwards, Obama, Iowa and... O.J. Simpson?

George Bush Sr. Checks Out Skull & Bones Before Dying

Total Huckabee in 30 Seconds

Not Just for Republicans Anymore

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Candidate Fuckability Quotient Part II

White House Log Information Given Out Like Candy

Will Texas Let Creationists Teach Science? Probs

Candidate Fuckability Quotient Part I

Corzine to Reduce Murder, Increase Crime

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Jim Cramer a Paultard

Russia Gives Iran Christmas Uranium

Gingerbread Woman

Al Franken Stops Failing at Being Funny

Nick, Stop Slutting It Up

Paultards Celebrate Underachieving Moneybomb with Tunes

Nothing Is More Republican Than Tax Avoidance

Wingnuts Dub Wonkette Fourth Most Overrated Political Blog! Yay!

Senator Fascist McAss Endorses McCain

Can a Naughty Boy Bring Down a Wannabe President?

Old Habits

Paultard Moneybomb an Abject Failure

I Only

Romney a Fake Cry Baby

Hillary Locks Up Major Iowa Endorsement, Stops Dying

Things To Think About

Gonzo No Longer "Lawyer of the Year"

Wonkette Sponsors Contribute to Wonkette Blimp

She'll Put a Spell on You

In Case You Weren't Invited to Axis of Fun's Sweater Party...

Hooray For All Blimps

Which Frontrunner Is The Most Dead?

Obama a Liability to Oprah?

Nick Farr Spotted Yelling at Paultards

It's the First Amendment, Bitches!

Kucinich Sells Horrible Recount Relic for Xmas

A Harbinger of Things to Come

Goodbye, Mary Bono

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9iu11iani Denying His Sanctuary Status

Commenter General Farr Leads Blimp Day Raid!

"Don't Worry, Girls, We'll Protect You"

Cartoon Violence Awwww Woogie Woogie Snoogums

Paultard Blimp Video Feed Kinda Working

Rich People Want You to Give Money

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Who Better Than a Fraud to Know What Fraud Is?

It's Up and Crashing In 3... 2... 1...

Senate Actually Does Something?

Ron Paul Steals Hitler's Crown

Smug Cloud Shoots to Upstate New York

More Fuzzy Math

Two Go In, One Comes Out

Lobbyists' War For Christmas (Trees)

Weather Alert!

DC Mourns Loss of Paultard Blimp Flyover

The Return of The Cackle

This Is Campaign Finance, Baby

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What Is That Smell?

Twelve Days of Ron Paul To Be New Tyrannical Cromwell Era

George Mitchell Says: Forgive, Forget

The Last Iowa Hoorah, Sans Kucinich

Charities Work to Screw Over Vets, Too

Cheney Eats Guests at Holiday Party

It's Not That Kind of Political, They Swear

She Returns

Judiciary Committee Finally Issues Contempt Resolutions Against Bolten, Rove, Miers

Our Government, Protecting No One

Feds Probing Al Sharpton's Jesus Money

Stuck in Cuban Prison, We Know They Can't Be Free

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Hills & Barry to Fake Attack Each Other Today

Celebrity Endorsement Death Match Continues

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Losers and Losers

Destroyer of the Year

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Oh, Okay, Never Mind Then

Some Actions Have Consequences

Snarf Alan Keyes Snarf Snarf

Never Stop Complaining About the Metro

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New Obama Girl Video

Stickin' It to The Man

Liveblogging Teh Iowaz, Part II

It's Not His Fault He's So Likable!

It's Debate Time, And Guess Who's Joining!

Mystery of Mitt's Mormon Underoos Solved

George Herbert Walker Prescott WASP Bush XXVI To Get Married

Pages Behaving Badly

Meet The Foreigns!

Santa, Jesus Killing Themselves

Oh, That Crazy Huck-ster

The Pope Sucks

Did You Guys Know That Bush Used To Drink Alcohols?

Australia Is a Cool Damn Place

Paultard Blimp Delayed, Delayed, Somehow Delayed More

Buffett Hedges His Bets

Goodbye, Massive Field of Republicans

Two Lips

Mike Huckabee's AIDS-less Family Says Hi!

Jews for Jesus

Former DC Cop Thinks Guns Are Cool, Now

The "Ethics" of Lobbying

Paultard Blimp To Cure AIDS Tomorrow

Fiscal Conservatives Launch Huckabee Offensive

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Waterboarding Is Totes Effective!

Tom Hanks Is The New Washington

They Just Won't Quit

Dana Perino "Exaggerating" About Cuban Missile Crisis Retardation

Oh So Here's That Robot That Heckled Clinton

Bad Form

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Christmas Is the Season for Sharing

This Man Will Snipe Everyone, But Mostly Ron Paul

Huckabee: Not Just Stupid About AIDS Anymore

Robot Heckles Bill Clinton. That Is All.

So, um, Hi!

Don't Shoot Obama!

The NYT Has Got It All Fingered Out

What the Hell Is Wrong with People?

HR 847 To Save Santy Claus

Romney Wants to Tell You About Huckabee's Mexican Fetish

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Samesies

Just Can't Get Enough

CNN Disappoints Shut-Ins, Political Junkies for Holidays

Everyone Likes Beer

TBD: Who Is Paultard Michelle?

Are You Having Regrets About Last Night?

Maya Angelou is God-ish

Getting Serious About Global Warming

Christian Biologist Fired For General Hatred of Biology

Southern Baptists Want You To Be Safe, Baptist

How Harley Grace Went Straight

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WALNUTS! It's Baseball's Curt Schilling!

DC Continues To Lose Money in Stupid Ways

Newsom a Little Too Hot to Handle?

An Open Letter to Tom Tancredo's Congressional District

Lobbyists Really Don't Mind Prison

Blimptards Choose Theme Song

Some Women Support Hillary, Just No One Really Famous

Dana Perino Dumber Than Everyone Else in History

Nobody Wants to Play Anymore

Blackwater Contract Shows Use of WD-40!

EXCLUSIVE: Dinner, with a Side of Ethics Violation

Plamegate Closed!

Guess What The Anti-Gay Scout Leader Was Arrested For?

Neocon Helms NY Times Week In Review Section

Pro-Choice Darling With a Dark Center

Paultard Blimp Launch Delayed

What Happened to Chuck Norris?

Ron Paul: Let the People Have Cocaine!

Insecurity Estimate

Be Kind Rewind

Cookie's Cooked, Done and Gone!

That NIE Thing is No Biggie, Really!

China to U.S.: Fuck Al Gore

Somewhere, Muhammad Weeps

We "Discuss," You Decide

Who Needs Oprah When You Have Sean Penn!

It's Been a Long, um, Week

Friday Fun With Icy Queen Dana Perino!

Marriage Really Is for Life (If You're Gay)

From McDonald's to Terrorism

Georgia Legislature Preps Cheerleader Gangbang

Bill Richardson Using Slavery For Final Push

Cartoon Violence Says "Whaaaa?"

To Our Beloved Commenters

Wonkette Sponsors Prefer Axis of "Evil" Over "Fun"

Paultard Blimp To Fly, Teabag Boston

Government Doesn't Find Osama Bin Laden

Flowers for Hillary!

Once Normal Man Sees Jesus in X-Ray

Rahm Emanuel, Amnesiac Douchebag Extraordinaire

Poll: Who's Mitt Romney's Doppelganger?

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Senate Pops PAYGO Cherry

Home Relief For Christians (Only)

The Amazing Kreskin Could End This Election Right Now

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Dickcember Wind Is Picking Up

Things That Never Change

Two Republican Congresswomen Resign From Board

Political Votes Now, Protection for You Later

Dana Perino Spices Up Reporter's Life

Energy Bill Chugging Along to Certain Death

Nah, It's Still A Cult

We're Not Number One!

Deer Wacky Diktater Dood

The AOF Circle of Life

Another Mormon Thing Romney Didn't Mention

Dick Claims to Have a Bigger, uh, Stick

Hey Mitt, Put The Needle On The Record!

Huckabee Supports God, Not Raping People

Time Magazine Promotes, We Surmise

Clooney's Cruisy Toilet!

We Must Never Be Reminded of National Debt

Bush Heralds the Apocalypse

Get God, Make Money, Tell Government Off

Will The Paultard Blimp Fail?

More Than Zero People Like Dick Cheney

Mary Carey: Buy My Tits!

Someone Else Has a Crush, Too

Romney Loves All Gods, Hates All Seculars

How Quickly They Forget

Axis Beaches!

Paultards Suffer Crushing Reality Check

Grace Babies Unveiled, No Fangs

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Rove Book May Snag $3 Million

Romney, You Better Fucking Talk About Magic Underpants

Clinton Staffer Resigns Over Smear E-mail

Huckabeen There, Done That

Updated: Mike McHaney Held

Shhhh... Axis Is Listening

Knut Is a Dirty Boy

¿Como Se Dice, 'Retard'?

Tancredo Ad Writers Are Shitty Human Beings

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DC Crippled By Single Inch of Snow

Pregnant Member

Tancredo Setting New Standards for Racism

Kucinich Loves His Hot Wife

The Very Mysterious Machinations of Mike McHaney

When Not Actively Racist, Joe Biden Is Great

Even Canadian Hackers Are Nice

Lucky Ex-NYC Cop Fed Pot Meatballs

Ron Brownstein: Be My Friend!

Good News, Crap News

Jenna Bush Calls Parents on TV, Finds Them Doing Nothing

Paultards Force Cancellation of San Fran Straw Poll!

We're Not the Most Incompetent!

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Mitt's Fired Gardener Still Hearts Mitt

More Parties, Less Irans

Politico Captures "Hill Staffers" In Partying Milieu

Huckabee Is So GQ!

The Endorsement of Jesus

Washington Times Columnist Underestimates Wonkette's Immaturity

Marble Mouth Mitt Dodges Faith Questions

LA Times To Study Candidates' Brains For Crazy Disease

Happy Repeal Day!

Axis of Fun Celebrates Christmas!

Hanukah in Tehran

Mike McHaney's Axis of Fun

Yeah, Well, We're Still Going To Kill You

Post-Holiday Giving

It's a Cliché for a Reason

Which Candidate Will Give This Man a Medical Marijuana Cigarette?

Guns Don't Kill People, But Farts Might

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Congressional Grilled Sandwich Dispute Becomes Scandal

Lessons in Bad P.R.

All-Business Thompson Team Calls Huckabee 'Court Jester'

Color Your Way To Safety

Hillary Actually Republican Piece of Cardboard

Hillary Is One of Madonna's "Girls"

Second Mexican 'West Wing' President Endorses Richardson

But They've Accomplished So Much!

Fighting for Our Rights in Alabama

Poll: What's Huckabee's Goddamn Deal?

2000 Election: The Sickness

Ron Paul: Live on The View!

People Still Talking About Kennedy Center Honors

When Is Religious Discrimination Okay?

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Everyone Concerned About Your Debt

Another Paultard That May Kill You In Your Sleep

Buy Your Ameros Today

Conservative Radio Host Sues Islam

Larry Craig To Explore Balinese Bathrooms

Huckbeez: I Can Haz Second Places?

Are you there God? It's Me, Fred

McHaney Held Without Bail

MittSpeak

Sen. Maria Cantwell: No Tolerance For Sex Predators

Senate Staffer Busted In Kiddie Sex Sting!

Sheldon Whitehouse Wants to Kick George Bush's Ass

This Here Be Oprah's Party!

John Is Pretty, Elizabeth Is Nice

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Obama Appeals to Indian-American Voters

Atlanta Paultards Attack Giuliani, Suck More

Participatory Journalism

Jim Gilmore Scares Away GOP Field

Not All Ethical Lapses Are Republican

Kennedy Center Honors, Um, Happened

Tucker Carlson a Dead Head In Several Ways

CNN To Co-host Debate With Enemies

Updated: Hostage Taker Faces 42 Years!

Earn Money, Try Not to Die

Obama Irate Over Clinton's Evil 'Criticizing' Tactic

Hugo Chavez Spoils National Treasure

This Chuck Norris Thing Is Oddly Legit

Larry Craig Goes Solo!

How Is This Legal?

This Paultard May Kill You In Your Sleep

Ben Johnson: "I am not actually gay"

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In Shocking Response, Larry Craig Denies Sex Allegations

He's Ba-ack

Simply a Gaudy, Empty Show

The Gays Come Out!

Idaho Statesman, Poofter Continue Larry Craig Destruction

Oh Nooo... Mr. Bill!

Dickcember: Plenty of Toothpaste in Tuber

Mistress Money

Hillary Clinton Makes Announcement, Looks Serene, Human

Illegal Alien Wonkette Sponsors Invade 'Sanctuary Internet'

Surgeon General: Santa's Too Fat

Evangelicals Don't Like Mormons

Pro-Erection, Anti-Abortion

Hostage Standoff Ends!

Entertainers to Take DC Area Hostage This Weekend

Update: Final Hostage Released, Suspect Alone Without Beer

Hillary Disses Hubby's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Crapromise

A Really Inconvenient Truth

Top Cop: 'The Hostage Situation is Still Fluid'

James Carville Seen Somewhere Besides CNN

UPDATE: Hostage Suspect Identified As Local Beer Drunk Armed With Road Flares!

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Who Is This Crazy Hillary Hostage Taker Man?

Who Is the Spoiled Child Here?

BREAKING: One Hostage Released, One Remains

Fox News Drives Unsafely to Hostage Crisis

Jeff Gannon Found Lacking

Dodd's Internal Campaign Emails

George Allen Loves Same Internet That Destroyed Him

The Evolution of a Bush Appointee

On The Campaign Trail With Clinton? Meh.

Cartoon Violence Is More Beast Than Man

Clarence Thomas Continues to Flip His Shit

Backstage Violence at Republican Debate

Texas Fires Science Chief for Too Much Interest in Science

Afghans Swap Smack For Pot

Cocktober... Blowvember... ???

Vice President Mike Bloomberg?

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Object of Everson's Termination-Worthy Affection Identified

No Homo!

Profiles In Sewage

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Massive Guinness Theft Reported, Wonkette Denies Involvement

Lamest Coup Ever Tanks!

Maryland Delegate Lawton Dies, Police Claim "Natural Causes"

Ed Koch: How's Rudy Doing?

I'm Voting For Mike Gravel Now

FEMA Figures Out a Way to Help Katrina Survivors

Metro Either To Get Prettier, Ugglier

Paultards Not Giving Up On This Blimp Hullabaloo

Fair Warning: Religious Types Hunting the Rest of Us

BREAKING: New Osama Tape Released!

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YouTube Debate Snubs Ben Johnson!

Tucker Carlson, We'll Miss You!

MSNBC Shockingly Calls CNN 'Total Crap'

Huckabeez Dominating That Dingus Mitt Romney

Roberta McCain Is God

At This Rate, We Are Never Leaving Iraq

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The Time Has Come

The GOP YouTube Debate: Exhaustion, Hatred, Meh.

Did Clinton Plant Old Gay Soldier at Debate?

Kitty Kelley Krazier Than We Thought

E-mails May Reveal John Edwards Had Affair

Barack Obama Flip-Flops on Dealbreaking TV Question

Hyde Heads For Leather Chair in the Sky

The Most Important Thing To Ever Happen

YouTube Debate Liveblogging, Part II

The Republican YouTube Debate: High Expectations All Around

YouTubin'

Tom Brokaw Hates The Gays!

Et Tu, Allan Hubbard?

Hillary Clinton Pinched on Murdoch Connex

Your Daily Dose of Paultard Video

Finally, Polo in Iraq!

Virginia GOP Not Sure About Blood Oaths Anymore

Words Can't Express Glee Over Tonight's GOP YouTube Debate

Thanks For Nothing, Assholes!

Fred Thompson, America's Serial Killer Candidate

John McCain Thrives On Hatred

Ted Kennedy's Week of Books, Love Children and Lawsuits!

Giuliani, Thespian Extraordinaire

Christian Retail Mogul Gives Oral Roberts U. $70 Million, God Cries

Georgia Man Tries to Use Fake $1 Million Dollar Bill, Fails

Obama Learns That Iowans Are Real People, Too

How Will We Ever Cross This River of Bullshit?

One of These Handshakes Will Provide Peace

Stephen King to Waterboard Jenna Bush

Virginia GOP Requiring Blood Oath

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Paultard Blimp Gives Way to Paultard Cat

Cheney's Roboheart Rewired For More Warring

On the Right, We Have E. M. Zanotti

Annapolis Not Breaking Into Furious Riots

Obama: Let The Hicks Have Their Guns!

Sean Taylor Murder Under Investigation

Paultard Blimp Videos Open Hearts, Wallets

Helen Thomas and David Gregory Caught Canoodling!

Keith Olbermann Is A Swamp Monster Nightmare!

Nowhere Says Peace Like Annapolis

$8 Million for Uncle Teddy!

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Flair Says Crazy Shit for Huckabee

AIDS Is The New Crack

Hillary's Monday: Bad News Bears

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Rolling Stone Dangerously Close to Huckabee Endorsement

McCain, Lindsey Graham: Lovers?

HIV/AIDS in DC a 'Modern Epidemic,' Republicans Probably Freaked

Trent Lott: Debate This!

Trent Lott Trots!

White House Oenophile Chills

Paultards Seek Blimp

Wonkette Loves It Some Trent Lott!

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Obama Mama Oprah Hits the Trail

NY Times Scales New Heights in Mean Condi Caricatures

Australian PM Ousted, Bush Probably Crying

Karl Rove: Mistakes Were Made

Building a Better Photo-Op

Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow

Congresswoman Announces She Has Terminal Cancer

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Wonkette Sponsors To Plant Questions With Dumb People

Have A Grateful Thanksgiving Weekend!

Is It Wrong to Lust After Katherine Harris' Tits?

Don't Donate to Charity This Holiday Season

CNN's Politics of Planting

Arkansas Mayor Once Abducted by Satan

Is Fred Thompson Still Alive?

Our Love For You Is Real

Tancredo Throws Bowl of Nachos at McCain

Scott McClellan: Depends on What Your Definition of 'Lie' Is

Chuck Norris Can Get A Man Pregnant

Cartoon Violence Is In A Tryptophan Coma

Black Friday Blues

Guns And Butter

Writer's Strike Threatens CBS Prez Debate

Wonkette Appoints Angry Commenter General in Paultard War

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Fred Thompson Compares Dems to NASCAR or Raccoons or Something

Is GQ's Clinton Cover Worth It?

Resolved: CNN's Debate Coverage Must Die

DC To Miss Wonkette On Its Day Off Tomorrow

Ron Paul Targeting Prostitute Vote in Nevada

Britain Loses Tax Data of 25 Million Redcoats

White House Interns Cover Shit Up, Too

Rudy Twitters, Nobody There

WaPo Really Phoning It In Before Thanksgiving

MoveOn Targets Facebook!

BREAKING: Conservatives Harbor Secret Gayness

Paultards Seize USA Today!

Alan Colmes Not An Alligator, Loves Willow!

POOFTER WINS!!!

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Someone Left A Cake Out In The Rain

Pimp My Primary

Buzzed, Cooked and Done!

Huckabee Endorser Ric Flair Beats Women

Bush White House Never Heard of The Pentagon Papers

Scott McClellan Trashes Bush Admin in Memoir

DC Transportation Impervious to Holiday "Delays"

Michael Eisner: I'm Registered As a Human Being!

Bush Pardons Turkey, As Per Usual

Sissybitch Diplomats No Longer Forced To Iraq

Ultimate Price of Bob Allen's Sucky Fun: $400K

NASCAR Rudy!

Hillary Clinton Hates Art

Pro Wrestling Legend Endorses Huckabee, We Cover It

Paultards Leak New Video, Threaten Another Moneybomb

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Ask Not What You Can Afford...

Maryland Cops Raid Wrong Address, Kill Dog

Iowa Says, 'Dance, Dance.'

Top Ten Rules of Advance Stagecraft

The Girls Your Mother Warned You About

Capitol Police Officer Suspended in Possible Link to Fires

Romney, Paul Gain In Clearly Bullshit NH Poll

DC Tax People Steal Money (In Traditional Sense)

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Fred Thompson Should Jump Off a Cliff or Something

Love Me! Love My Sweater!

Fran Townsend's Handwriting Proves That Terrorists Are Winning

Russian Aliens Totally Love Dennis Kucinich

Paultards Set To Take Western Front

DMV Loves Osama!

Hillary Gets Pink'd

Vitter Not Openly Paying For Sex Anymore

New Arabic MTV To Be Awkward

CNN Asks The Questions Around Here!

McCain Would Reject Secret Service In Fantasy Presidential Scenario

Lecondel! Lecondel! To Life!

Chuck Norris Doesn't Endorse, He Tells America How It's Going to Be

Me Hillary, You Vote

Bob Allen Sentenced, Resigns :(

Iraq to Attack Arizona

Hey, Takoma Park Has a Film Festival!

None

Paultard Money Seized in Raid!

Don't Make Fun of Liz Glover's Camera!

Larry Craig's Gay Blue Honda Reappears!

Wonkette Sponsors Unsure if Hetero Affairs Count for Blowvember

Russian Cult Barricades Itself for End of Days

Meet The Press, Again

Poll: Would You Vote For Mitt Romney If He Hated Your Everything?

Cartoon Violence: It's In One Hole or Out the Other

CBS Files Motion to Dimiss Dan Rather's Bizarre, Mystifying Lawsuit

Clinton Better, Obama Loses Hand

Vegas Baby, Vegas!

Liveblogging, Hour II

The Most Important Debate of Our Time

Gather Round All You Clowns...

Mongolian Babies Invade Arlington!

Tucker Carlson Still Not Gay!

Next Time We're Going To Throw The Babies

None

Who's Hotter: Suzanne Malveaux or Campbell Brown?

The Spambots Are Attacking! RUN!

Getting to Dulles Will Always Be a Bitch

None

Is This Guy For Real?

Paultards Get No Ass

Georgia Gov. Claiming Victory in Rain Prayer

'Meet The Press' Almost as Old as Roberta McCain

None

Google Grills Obama

Rock Rapids, Iowa Punks 9ui11iani

Osmonds Rock The Mormon Vote!

Iowa College Republicans Leader as Bad as You'd Imagine

Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad

My My, Aren't Geopolitics Going Swimmingly This Morning?

Kos Headed to Newsweek, Newsweek Headed to Grave

A Nightly Paultard Bombing Round

Jesus Rolling In His Grave

Barack Obama's Technology Plan: Sleeper Hit of 2007

Rudy, Please Don't Smile. Ever.

Oh Right, Tim Page Is Hilarious

None

Downer Gay People Ruining Fun!

Prince Charles Has Birthday, Looks Stoned, Gets Ice Cream

None

Nun Charged For Doing Little Boys

Buckle Up, New Jersey: Here Comes Governor Jon Bon Jovi!

Mark Foley Planning Political Comeback, Somehow, Someday

OK, So Maybe Some Bridge Players Are Cool

Judith Regan Court Docs!

Appeasement Is Not An Option

Kennedy Book Bid To Top Five Million

Andrew Sullivan Praises Obama For Being Young-ish

Lawsuit: Publisher Fired To Protect Giuliani!

New Package, Same Great Taste

SNL: Hillary Clinton Is Funny. Barack Obama? Not So Much

JFK Was A Mormon, Too!

'Bombing Starts In Five Minutes'

Some Dumbass Marries a Dog

Somewhere, Woody Harrelson Grins Like an Idiot

Macaca Chairs Fred Thompson's Virginia Campaign

It's War: Facebook v. Hillary Clinton!

Government Types Hold Alien Panel, Pull 9/11 Card

Colbert to Run Colonial Williamsburg?

Politics On The Brain

Fox News Guest: This Is What a Chinaman Looks Like

Studies Show Women Leaders Perceived As Bitchy, Cold and Conniving

An Open Letter to Redstate.com

Tom Tancredo Outdoes Himself

Bruce Springsteen Needs to Leave Already

Georgia Gov Sponsors State Rain Prayer

None

David Phillips Talks Poofter, Larry Craig on Radio

Crybabies

Fred Will Save Your Babies

Karl Rove Is A Techie, Twitters, Totes iPhone

Right to Life Endorses Fred Thompson's Right to Life

Hillary Clinton A 'Chilly Harlot'!

None

John McCain's Batshit Senile Mother Speaks, Offends

This Justin In: The DC Skyline is Phallic

Tainted Death Toys Sold Online, of All Places

None

Nancy Reagan for Bloomberg! Everyone for Bloomberg!

Pay for Bernie Kerik or Suffer Giuliani's Murder Eyes

Put Down Your Pencils

And the Election's Only a Year Away

Happy Vitterans Day Weekend

None

Brits Laugh "Derisively" at Tom DeLay

Prostitute Discusses David Vitter's Small Penis in Hustler

Jay-Z to Hopefully Not Perform Any "Kingdom Come" Songs in DC

Former Arizona Governor Joins UFO-Sighting Craze

John Boehner, Always With the Tobacco!

Psst... Bob Jones University Secretly Hates Mitt Romney

Wonkette Sponsors Are Loving Blowvember

Looking For a Good Time This Weekend?

George Wallace Shooter Randomly Freed from Prison

Popular Ohio Gov. Endorses Hillz

WTF, Kiefer Sutherland's Still Here?

The Post's Top Sexual Political Scandals EVARR

Damn Demrats And Their "Liberal" Desire to "Change"

"Twenty Dollar" Bob Jury: The Stall Is Big Like Whoa

None

Cartoon Violence's Eyes! Cartoon Violence's Eyes!

Principle, Conviction and Works of Fiction

Tickle Torture!

Your "Angry Paultard Response E-mail With Poor Grammar" Post of the Day

None

Broncos Kicker Ruins Jihad's Good Name with Novel

Nats Join White Flight

Bob Allen Jury To Visit Infamous Potty

None

Ron Paul Wins NY Straw Poll, NY a Stupid State

None

HILLARY KILLZ KITTEH... Perhaps

Tom Cruise: The New Larry Craig

WaPo Repressing Horrible Headline Word Choice

Christian Conservatives Splitting Up Jesus Vote

Chinese Toys Laced With Date Rape Drugs. Yup.

Green Day To Bush: Fuck You, Again!

Rosie: Bill Clinton Made Me Cry!

France Has Been Forgiven

Hillary Has a Serious Body Count

None

"Twenty Dollar" Bob Trial Being Liveblogged!

Laura Dern Channeling Her Inner Kitty Harris

How Cute Was That Deer on the Red Line?!

Dipnote: You Pussy Diplomats, The Anbar Party Don't Never Stop

None

Mitt Romney's Ties to Satan, Hooters Caught on Video

None

Pa. Governor Endorses Rapping Groundhog

Barack Obama's Dream Police!

Are Pautardian Moneybombs Like... Real Bombs?

BREAKING: LBJ, Bob McNamara Dislike Hippies

Pat Robertson for Giuliani, Sam Brownback for McCain, Hermione Granger for Romney

Bill Clinton and the Bowl of Chips: The Cinema Event of 2007

Uber Flack Mark Penn Grounds Us All

The Man Fights The Man, Man

This Vote is Retard-Proof

DHS Ruining Halloween These Days

DC Taxi Drivers To Hold Forum About Mandatory Iraq Service

Oral Roberts Regents in Non-Sex Scandal

Leeches In The Family

What a Paultard Spambot Looks Like

The Sarko Has Landed

Colbert Introduces Pelosi at Girly Fashion Do-Da

Al Gore May Not Win Pulitzer With This Crap

None

Rosie Ups From Gross Grainy Video To Primetime Politics Show

Bill Clinton To The Rescue!

New Jersey Considers the Nutjob Vote

Cheney Closing in on Death, Finally

Obama Kneecaps Colbert

None

Fred Thompson Slowly Learning He Sucks

Bono Whipped By Nancy Pelosi!

Taking Speeding Tickets Away From Hardworking Americans

Ron Paul Spambots Make Over $2.5 Million Today

Dude, I Got So Shitfaced at the Iran Party

Ron Paul Spambots Make Over $2.5 Million Today

Bloomberg Fan Shits on Clinton, Trannies, Self

Internet Writers Will Not Go On Strike (Boo!)

None

Election A Year Away... Still

Messianic Democrat to End World's Problems, Zioni$m

Federal Lawsuit Over Sharapova's Assets

None

Live, From New York, It's Barack Obama!

Absolut Makes Science Easy

None

Paultard: I Am Not A Zombie Or A Retard!

Michael Chertoff to Play New Enemy in 24

None

We Watch Condi so You Don't Have To

Bear Hunting in Virginia!

We Are More Similar Than We Are Different

Stop Using "Hillary" and "Pile On" in the Same Sentence!

Of Course, It Will Never End

None

David Vitter Is So Screwed

Some Indie Rock Band is Playing Somewhere

Richard Curtis a "Demrat" Punching Bag

TMI: Elizabeth and Dennis Kucinich

Wonkette Sponsors Did Not Include Propel Fitness Water

Clinton Adviser A Dumpster-diving Hippie Farmer

A One-Two Punch to Start Blowvember

None

Inside the College Student's Political Mind

Larry Craig, David Phillips Spotted in DC (Separately)

Cartoon Violence: Viva Alberto Sangre Derramada!

None

Tonight We're Gonna Party Like It's 1989!

MSNBC on Top of Its Game

Romney Adds Death Aspect to Gay Marriage Debate

Fires, Again!

Whiny Babies

No One Will Ever Be Attorney General Again

New Ways to Pay Your Cabbie Revealed

Mad NYC Councilman to Put Pigeons on Birth Control

None

A Douchey New Reason to Hate SCHIP

Richard Curtis: "He would drop me like a hot potato"

None

Let's Sue That Minnesota Airport for Being Gay

In Honor of Cocktober's All Stars

George Clooney a Commie?

Dick Cheney Torturing Animals Now

None

Diplomats Bitching About Mandatory Iraq Service

Paultards Revealed To Be Robot Spammers

"Snowflake" Rumsfeld Is A Little Like Santa

McCain Taking His Wet Dreams Online

Wonkette Comments FAQ

Wonkette Masthead

What Is Wonkette?

Wonkette Artists

Wonkette Stats

Wonkette Advanced

Inquisition!

Round Two For Clinton

America First

Bill Richardson Beats Powhatan for Indian Endorsement

None

Colbert Can't Afford to Be Republican

Clinton Eats Rats, Edwards Gambles, Giuliani Hams

GMU Secret Society to Alter Course of History!

Chuck Hagel Dons Naughty Nurse Costume

Hugfest at Rite Aid

The Male-Female Lobbyist Mating Dance

None

Satan Manifesting Himself in Preteen Girls

Bob Woodruff Soooo Fwiendless

None

Kucinich Questions Bush's Mental Health

From Mexico and Outer Space, Aliens Visit Debates

Wa. State Police Pen Perfect Novella to End Cocktober

None

Front Runner Blues

Alien Agenda: Kucinich & Obama Battle Over Space Monsters

Pelosi Rips Head Off Chicken, Drinks Its Blood

Sen. Barack Obama's New York Daze

None

HuffPo Blogger Pens Epic Dodd Endorsement

Edwards Camp Under Fire After Mock Criticizing Colbert

Conservative Lawmaker: "I have not had sex with a guy"

Hot New Item: Barick O'Cheney

None

Politico Falls for Hoax Blackwater Press Release

Clooney Shoots in DC, Will Return Again and Again

Cheney, Sharpton Phoning In a Controversy

None

OBAMA HATES AMERICA WITH HIS HANDS

Sam Adams (Beer) Suing Sam Adams (Human)

Lies are to Politics as Sand is to the Beach

Inside Washingtonian's Power 150

Stand In The Fire

Government Causes Bizarre Space-Time Continuum Chaos

Tom Tancredo Quitting Congress, Retiring To Mexico

Pastors Combat Halloween With Online Op-Eds

None

None

Mondays With the Great White Bear

Schwarzenegger: Biggest Pothead of All Time

The Hatchet Still Sucks

New Gerald Ford Bio Shits on Cheney, Clinton

FEMA Creep Who Faked Press Conference Gets Promoted!

Glorious 1980 Returns As Oil Nears $100

None

Massholes Are Such Massholes These Days

Ann Coulter Is Gay

Woodstock Museum Sen. Chuck Schumer's Idea!

Sarkozy Too Cool for "60 Minutes"

Blackwater Employee Ends Congressional Bid

GW Newspaper Kids Are the Worst

TSA Bravely Fighting the War on Terror...at the Bar

First Lady Roll Out

Blackwater Is For Our Children's Future

Wonkette Sponsors May Have Had Sex With Larry Craig

None

Laura Bush: Islamofascist Ass Kisser

None

French Shower Rumsfeld with Love, Subpoenas

George Clooney Doesn't Care About DC

The Great White Bear Speaks!

None

All Paultards Are Racist (Duh)

Ironic Condi Photo of the Day

Homeland Security MILF Dating Clinton Spokesman?

Cocktober Winds Down in Fairest Washington

Thank You Ma'am, May I Have Another?!!

What's So Funny 'Bout Hillary Turning Sixty!

David Brooks' Brain Controlled by Indian Help Desk

The War on Jesus

FEMA Asks Itself the Tough Questions

EXCLUSIVE: "I Had Sex with Larry Craig!"

None

The Jimmy Carter Movie Could Be So Much Better

PA Classifies Voting Locations Because of Terrorists

Florida Officials Frown on Hot Lesbian Prison Marriage

U.S. Army to Literally Use Ray Guns on Iraq

Hello Blackwater!

Obama's Ex-Gay Gospel Singer: Maybe Not So Ex-Gay?

An Endorsement for "Slut Day"

Be a Bloodthirsty Mercenary, or Look Just Like One!

Cartoon Violence Is Sick Of You

Fighting Fire With, Well, You Know

SCHIP Ready To Be Vetoed Again

McCain Absolutely Not a Hippie

Dick Cheney: Hunting Again!

House Dems Introduce TRILLION Dollar Tax Reform Thing

Is Iraq Corrupt? Don't Ask Condi!

Bedtime for Bombzo

Tancredo to Eliminate Competition with Sports Bets

None

Obama Primes Homo Grudge-Match

BREAKING: McCain a "P.O.W." In Secret "Vietnam" War

Petworth a Hot Zone?

California Wildfires? Blame the Queers, Duh

Ann Coulter Dating Liberal Jew

Condi & Charlie: Together at Last!

Pelosi Throws the Shocker

Colbert Polling Well Among Retarded College Students

Dana Perino: Global Warming Helps the Cold, Poor

Biden Still Hates Blacks

None

Mob Leaders Discussed Whacking 9/11

Does the Huckabee Messenger Bag Come in Pink?

Guest Editor Relieved by Chris Dodd's Hair Disclosures

5-Year Delay

Seriously Though, No Homo

Save Jesus' Birthday with Bumper Stickers

What Kind of Sweater Puppies Would You Vote For?

Your Daily Blackwater Schadenfreude Update

DC Gangbangs: Cheney, Rumsfeld, Bennett... Sajak?

None

U.S. To Bomb Kurdistan In Order To Save It

Santorum Rallying Against Islamo-Fascism, Becoming Columnist

Nobody Proud of Capitol Hill Interns

Justice Dept. Official Is Government Telework Pioneer!

Ben Harper Joins Numerous Fogeys In Slow Jam Against Nukes

None

Brownie to Save World, Yet Again

John Edwards' Blog Becomes CUTE Dog Show

Kiefer Sutherland to Torture DC

Hill Dishes On Bill's Sick Tooth Fetish!

None

Obama's Butter Cow

Our Favorite Congressman, Mr. Handsy

Thompson Staffer Deems McCain Slightly Less Pathetic

Barack Obama Will Kick Your Ass!

Baptist Accidentally Endorses Heretic

No Nukes! Fondue! Jimsonweed!

Et Tu, Rudy?

Fire Balls!

Over and Over and Over

London and NYC Better Than DC

Paultards Exiled from Holy Land, Europe, Now RedState.com

As California Burns, Refugees Party, Chill

Coulter Stirs Puzzlemakers Into Biased Frenzy

None

Is Patricia Heaton Evil?

Kucinich Smells Roses, Listens to Aliens

Pederasts for Giuliani!

Clemson Tigers' Blackwater Connection

Inferno To Turn La-La Land Libs To The Right?

Candidates' Wives Bicker over Who Is Most Homely

None

United: Hitch And The Hammer!

None

CIA's Call of the Wild

None

ARRESTED: Cutest Polar Bears Ever!

America Spits On Rambo's Grave!

Oral Roberts Still Alive, Having Heat Flashes

NSA To Recruit Children, Furries

Silly Telecoms, You Can't Bribe A Plutocrat!

We'll have ours and also yours

Three Cheers for Islamo-Fascism!

Critics Calling New CIA Counterterrorism Logo a "Slam Dunk"

Secret Agent Gal Promotes Book, Smites Enemies

Walnuts! He's Actually Losing His Mind

None

Girl Who Got Hit by Brick Is Ruining DC

Dulles Airport Briefly Evacuated; Reopened

Masshole Libs Love Airpork

None

U.S. Army Establishes Robot Caliphate

Alaskan GOP Grapple Over GILF, Mean Old Man

None

Poor George Snuffleupagus!

Stupid October Rebellion Gets Bloody-ish

BREAKING: Bill Clinton Turns Down Chance To Hang Out With Jeri Thompson

You Have Been Poked by Right-Wing Facebook

Sedated, Smiling & Sassy!

Chuck Norris Endorses Huckabee, Ninja-Dropkicks Hillary

All The Cool Kids Giving $2,300 To Mitt Romney

Objectively Pro-Terrorist Cable Giant Charges Brave FBI To Spy On You!

Stephen Colbert, Tim Russert Confuse Each Other

Cartoon Violence Has Some Modest Proposals

Breaking: Sen. Hillary Clinton Has Temper, Hate

Carrots, Sticks and other things for flogging

Freddy's Got a Gun!

Outspoken Conservative Sex Children Blah Blah Pedophile

Sweeps Week for the Pentagon!

The Thing About Criminals

The USDA Wants to Eat Your Cat

R&B Dance Parties 4ever

Black Cowboys Take Washington!

None

Brilliant Money Manager Buys Letter from Harry Reid for $2.1 Million

None

Colbert Accepts Donation (Salary) from Corporate Lobbyist (Employer)

None

Little Barry Gots All Famous

Pope Returns From Hell

When Hunter Met Sally

Tanker Hijacked, D.C. Could Be Blown Up

None

Draft Kitty Harris!

Democratic Congressman a Disgrace, Republicans Say

Obama: "'I've Got All Kinds of Rogues in My Background"

Hillary Clinton's Hippie Pipe Dream Up in Smoke

Infamous Douchebag Coaches "Team Thompson"

Barry Manilow Backs Biden!

Go Back To Rowayton

None

It's Time For A Real Republican Candidate

Have You Considered A Career in Law Enforcement?

DC Blog Violence!

Georgetown Has Money? We Should Pillage Georgetown

None

Cleaning Woman Not Qualified to Wipe Bush's Ass

Arlen Specter Tells Boner Jokes

House 100% Non-Partisan at SCHIP Vote

TSA Goons Miss 75% of 'Bombs' But Take Your Toothpaste Anyway

None

Hookers, Hawaii and Hot Tubs!

Nicolas Sarkozy Has Republican Values, Divorces His Wife

Children Marvel over Karl Rove's 2004 Electoral Coup

Jeb Bush's Brat Son Sells Soul to Giuliani

Oral Roberts President Steps Down

Valerie Plame Likes Getting 'Chewed Out'!

None

Mukasey: Less Fun Than Gonzalez

Cooter for Edwards!

None

Mitt Romney Gets 'Vanilla Steamer' ... And Refuses To Pay For It

A Little Exile Never Hurt Nobody

Super Tuber Saaaad

Colbert Running a Lukewarm 20th in Odds

Huckabee Suggests We All Just Masturbate

Funniest Celebrity in Washington is SCHIP

Bush: Photo Opps Total Bullshit!

Someone Just Give McCain $5 So He'll Shutup

None

Bush Doesn't Remember the '80s

Texas Governor Endorses 9/11-Fucker

Meet the Last Bush Supporters

Take Our Survey, Win a Billion Dollars!

Larry Craig is Totally NOT Gay!

Ben Affleck: The Hillary Clinton Interview

That Intern Looks Tasty, I Think I'll Have That

Stephen Colbert to Play South Carolina Spoiler

Gore: Still Not Running

None

Marion Barry's Office Having Angry Crack Withdrawal

One Man's Genocide Is Another Man's Re-Election Bid

Cindy Adams: Edwards Camp Scared Shitless

White Dreadlock Rapper likes Booze, Pot, Politics and Imus!

What's a Little Atrocity?

DICK CHENEY IS BLACK!

None

Perfecting Ann Coulter (If Possible!)

Whine, Whine, Whine

Iraq: $18 Trillion Jackpot!

Rudy: Be Prepared for Space Terrorists!

Rudy 9/11 to Return 9/11s worth $9.11 to 9/11

None

A Children's Treasury of Dumb Larry Craig YouTube Clips

Some Senators Not Having Scandals Right Now

Larry Craig to Provide Wonkette With Glut of Material Tonight on NBC

None

Michelle Malkin Too Hot for O'Reilly Factor

MCCAIN CAN'T PAY HIS MONEYS DEBT

None

Three's Company

Sean Penn: Anyone But Newsom!

But Is There A Douchebag Award?

DHS Blows Goats, Too

Laura Bush Bakes No Cookies

I Guess We Should Talk About Mickey Kaus Blowing Goats Now

Matt Lauer's Endless Cummer

Barack Obama is Black, Mexican, Asian, Gay, Religiony

Giuliani: Big Spitter

McCain Aggressively Panhandling

Et Tu, SNL?

Republican Simpsons Fans: We Were Not Hacked

Twenty-Dollar Bob Allen Will Soon Be Tried For Sex Crimes

None

White House Also Trying To Start War With Space Monsters

Wikipedia's Better, Though

Fred Thompson Loves Jews, Hates Blacks

Foreclosures May Make Republicans Vote for Woman or Black Guy

Best Maureen Dowd Column Ever Written by Stephen Colbert

None

Wisconsin GOP Boss Accused of Doping & Fondling 16-Year-Old Runaway Boy

Radical Oral Roberts Lawsuit Implies... Hypocrisy!

Racist Postcards From the Edge

None

Laura Bush Suddenly Thinks She's A Big Deal

None

Larry Craig's Dimwitted Wife Feels Her Life's 'Going Down Drain'

The Same, But Different

Redskin Arrested in Drunken Brawl

"I have never been a quitter."

Swamp Thing

Bush, Putin Beef Over Chicken

None

Please Wash

Some Reporter Asked Laura Bush An Inscrutable Question

Two Names That I Can Hardly Stand to Hear

Panic! At the Gum Ball Machine

NHFA's Noche de Gala

House Republicans Turn SCHIP into Simpsons Joke

None

Based On A Dumb Book

Hot Week for Youth Boot Camps!

Rejected Posts For My Last Day at Wonkette

Richardson Enviously Congratulates Gore

Ted Kennedy's Bizarre 1964 Plane Crash Still Haunts Him

None

None

Rudy Giuliani's Best Friend Will Be Indicted, Too

Cartoon Violence Is Seeing Double

Row, Jimmy, Row...

wHoOoO IRAQ dRiNkZZZ PARTYS!1!!!

None

Wait, People Are Quoting Petraeus Now?

The Child is Grown

Dodd Plan to Take Someone to Sox Game a Complete Disaster

Mitt Romney Launches Jihad on Jihad!

Wonkette Sponsors Have Some Recipes They'd Like to Share

John Edwards Did Not Have Sex With That Hippie

None

Larry Craig To Make Primetime Debut

iLies

Rudy G. Has New Special Slimy Friend!

None

Congress: NASCAR Fans Have the Hepatitis Cooties

Cheney Sad!

At Least Mitt Romney Admits His Cabinet Is Gay

None

None

Ann Coulter Will Annihilate the Jews

None

U.S. Marines No Longer Answer To U.S.

None

A Child Could Do It

None

Billing From Home

Did John Edwards Sleep With This Lady?

None

Al Gore Could Win Nobel Peace Prize, Presidency Thing

McCain Now Ripping Off Forgotten Danny DeVito Roles

Times Are Tough For Billionaires

National Enquirer, Ann Coulter Know John Edwards Had Affair

None

I'll Work All Week

Wrap It Before You Tap It

Pink Elephants on Parade

None

None

Maverick McCain's Hero: Doomed Communist Loser Fictional Terrorist

NYC Councilman Gets Very NYC at Norwegian

Tony Fratto's Impressive Background

WaPo Columnist Boldly Proposes Torture For Bush, Gonzales

Define Evil

None

Obama's Flickr Intern to be Fired

None

Tancredo to Deport Mitt Romney

None

Hillary Earns Crucial Goo Goo Dolls Endorsement

None

Laura Bush vs. Burma

None

Mike Huckabee Criticized for Fantastic Joke

Stall of Fame

None

Dennis Kucinich Sucks at Getting Off Ballots, Too

Obama Targets 17-year-old Girls in Iowa

White House Urges Congress Not to Learn From History

Son of 'Candid Camera' Host Couldn't Care Less What You Think

Not A Crook

The French Got It Right

Fred Thompson Campaign Has a Notion!

Republicans Bravely Stand Up For Global Corporations, Against American Workers

Reason Number Infinity Not to Work for Clinton: Rob Reiner

Nixon Pans Fred Thompson's Performance From Beyond the Grave

Bachmann Didn't Mean to Support Her Boyfriend

Aren't These Guys Supposed To Know About Money? Liveblogging Dearborn, Part II

Meet Débutante Fred: Liveblogging the GOP Debate

Sony's Well Funded Take on Larry Craig

None

First-Ever GSA Blog Brilliant Comment on Banality of Entire Web

None

White House Bravely Destroys Anti-Terror Spy Network

Live-blogging Hollywood Fred's Big Day

Mitt Romney Refuses To Smoke Up Disabled Guy

None

Right-Wing Bloggers Hate Most Right-Wingers

Da Krusaderz

Save the Last Stance Pun for Richard Cohen

Doc At the Battle Station

Elvis Costello To Celebrate Hillary's Old Age

Why Doesn't Anyone Like Joe Biden?

Chalk It Up

None

If Everybody Kills Themselves, Ron Paul Will Win!

Who Will Stop America's Real Terrorists?!

None

None

Terry McAuliffe Supports Creepy Alleged Rapist Anand Jon!

None

John McCain's Other Daughter Has a Lame Blog!

None

Christopher Columbus Was A Dick

Three Day Weekend

Giant Anus Discovered

None

Newsweek Celebrates America's Hottest Powerful Women

Bob Novak: GOP Always Knew Larry Craig Was The Idaho Bathroom Goblin

Jenna Sleeps With John-John

None

Lynne Cheney Tells Some

Dowd Still Not Sorry For Making Al Gore Grow a Beard

Fight the Urge to Win

Reconstruction is for Pansies

Cummer Never Ends: DiFatta, Craig, and the Oral Roberts Cougar

Fred Thompson Begs For Applause

None

Gigolo: Sen. Larry Craig Used Me!

None

The Littlest Gregory

Brave, Boring College Journalist Keeps His Job

Cartoon Violence Loves Shaking Hands, Hates Kissing Babies

Top Shelf

Larry Craig Wants To Share His Super Tuber With You

None

Everybody But Rudy Pretends To Love God

None

None

Fresh from Minnesota: Sen. Larry Craig's Court Documents!

Wonkette Sponsors Have Taken Over the City

MN Columnist Held Hostage by Dangerous Hippies

Rudy Wins 3rd Quarter Cash Battle, "Who Can Say 9/11 the Most" Competition

None

Early and Often

Rope 'Em & Ride 'Em

Hang 'Em High

America, Barack Obama Hates You!

Meet the Romneys

A Nation Rejoices: Larry's Gonna Stay

None

Democrats and the Elusive White Male

Mitt to Beg Voters to Overlook His Scary and Confusing Religion

None

They Say Animals Don't Worry

LARRY CRAIG STILL GUILTY, STILL MAYBE RESIGNING OR MAYBE NOT, WHO KNOWS

Is Rudy Giuliani the Republican Oprah?

None

None

Fred Thompson Teaches Birth Control To Children

Everyone Will Be President!

GOP Convention Logo Revealed

None

Ships Sink Rat-Free

Wacky Predictions Day

Sinatra's Ex-Wife Rails Against Kindly Old Ex-President

None

None

Senate Burns, Bush Issues Emergency Decree

Hot Investment Tip: Republicrats! Demicans!

None

How Do You Say 'Tap Tap Tap' In Farsi?

None

Thompson's Presidential Campaign About Nothing

Kucinich, Little Lion of the Left

Maryland Is For Mexicans

None

None

Hillary Cracks Nuts, No Hope for Obama

None

How Maverick McCain Became Walnuts McLoser

First-Ever State Dept. Blog Sort of Begging To Be Mocked

None

Big Gay Left

(Why) Do They Hate Us?

None

John Warner Hospitalized

None

None

Google Knows Your, Mitt Romney's Secrets

Odds and Sods

Further Reports On Our Eventual Victory Are Right Around the Corner!

Ian MacKaye's Brave Plea: 'I AM NOT DEAD'

50-50 Shot

None

NYC Gay Legend Dead After Saudi Sex Parties In D.C.

Sentimental Hygiene

None

None

Little Kids Ask Rice Hard-Hitting Questions

None

None

Important Changes Regarding Your Wonkette

OMG HILLARY BEAT BARRY HUSSEIN AT RAISING ALL THE MONEY

None

Jenna & Henry Shocker: Rich Powerful White People Often Marry Each Other!

None

Work For Blackwater, Drunkenly Shoot Anyone You Like

None

Stump Speak

None

This Too Shall Pass

Hillary's Terrible Laugh Dooming Her Campaign

None

None

Salmon Try to Send Larry Craig Up the River

None

Top Pentagon Gal: 'I Hate All Iranians'

None

Vladimir Putin Will Heroically Step Down As President To Become Prime Minister, Again

None

America Still Wants to Fuck Bill

Unpopular Self-Branded Condoms

World's Hottest PMILF Maybe Wins Ukraine Election?

None

An Unaccustomed Wine

Only 13 More Months of YouTube '08!

None

America Is Finished: Newt Will Not Run For President

None

Clintons Still to Blame For Everything

God Hates Rudy

Everyone is Screwed

Tool, Toolbox, or Tool Shed?

None

Navy: WTF @ Teenagers

The District Line Grand Opening

None

No Sleep Till Brookland

"He Kind of Snarled Back"

Bewilderment

None

Wonkette Sponsors Can't Quit

Cartoon Violence Does A Double Take

Obama's Subconscious Mind Now Sending Fundraising Emails

None

100 Simple Questions For Becoming an American Citizen

Just Tell Him The Planes Shouldn't Hit One Another

None

Liveblogging the Whites and the Blacks, GOP Edition

Back In Black: Liveblogging the GOP Tavis Smiley Debate, Part II

Liveblogging the Second/Third Tier GOP Debate

Trading Spaces: Third Reich Edition

An Entire Panel of Larry Kings

The Most Annoying Party Promoter in DC

None

Lucky Winner of the "Eat a Bowl of Chips With Bill" Contest: Angelina Jolie

Tonight: Live-Blogging The Greatest GOP Debate Ever

NSA Holds Seminar Teaching Media How to Not Report on NSA

U.S. Economy In Trouble? Call Chuck Norris

You Take The Money Out Of The Pot

WTF Is Going On At Walter Reed These Days?

None

Who's 'Behind' the GOP Plot To Split California's Electoral Votes?

None

Hillary Clinton's Desperate Plea To Gal Eating Chips With Bill

Is Your Embassy Running?

George W. Bush's Last Followers Found At Fisting Orgy

None

Blackwater: The Shootinest Mercenaries in Iraq

Bush Determined to Strike in Iraq

None

It's All Relative

More From What's Left of the Mind of Larry King

You Start Crying When The String Breaks

None

White House Press Corps Annoy Bill Sammon With Highfalutin Ways

Idaho Bathroom Goblin's Airport Melodrama To Drag On For At Least Another Week

None

Hotel Duck Murderer Is Federal Government Employee!

None

Trillion-Dollar Freedom On The March

None

Revenge Ain't So Sweet

Get Blitzed With Rudy

None

Cruisy Toilets Go Mainstream

None

NWA Court Is In Full Effect

Dirty Money

Jenna Reflects on a Life Cut Short by Arranged Marriage

None

Win a Very Boring Date With Bill

Home Grown

How To Fight Loneliness

Laughing for Change

Rudy Falls Victim to Boat Curse

Bush, Ahmadinejad United In Love Of UT Longhorns

None

Barry Obama Has a Reassuring Subliminal Message For White America

Arlen Specter Is Not Keeping Up With Pornography

None

None

None

None

None

Pronounce Like a President

Cost of Living Adjustment

Say No To Burqas

None

Fundraising With Rudy: $9.11 Is A Joke

Fail Again. Fail Better.

None

OMG: Laura Dern Is Kitty

House Repubs Almost As Broke as Majority of Constituents

Tuesday Hot List

Minnesota Prosecutor Has Pretty Much Had It With Larry Craig's 'Reactionary, Calculated and Political' Plea-Reversal Crap

Where Do Politicians Go When They Die?

None

If Your Gay Boyfriend's Married To A Woman, It Means You're Not Gay!

To Do: Buzz Aldrin Comes Alive

None

None

Meet the New Miss Teen South Carolina

Bush Loves Hitlery, Hates Rudy

None

You're Empty and I'm Empty Too

None

No They Didn't

None

San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom: 'Corrupt Nasal-Drip Child'

None

Who the Hell Called Rudy At the NRA?

None

G. H. W. Bush's Pool Boy Hates Entire Bush Family

Florida First In the Nation -- For Wackiness!

Instead of Coffee, Drink Blackwater

We Can Rebuild Him

To Do: This Will Probably Not Show Up Until Monday

Partly Cloudy With Chance of Shame

Sorry Our Site Hasn't Worked All Day!

Cartoon Violence Is Stark Raving Nude

None

INTOLERANCE SHOCKER: Hillary Says She's No Condi Rice

None

Country That Doesn't Even Have President Mocking Ours

Work All Day, Still Can't Pay the Price of Gasoline and Meat

Wonkette Sponsors Love Their Wives

None

NYT on Rudy: 9/11 9/11 9/11

None

The Political Assassination of Ted Stevens

None

The View From Here

None

Speaking of the Dollar Collapse, Here's the Gerald Ford Corn Maze!

Good Evening Mr. Waldheim

None

America's Love Affair With 'Don't Tase Me' Guy Continues

None

None

Holy Bible and Ron Paul Team Up Against The Poor

None

In Rudy Giuliani's Mind, He's 'One Of The Four Or Five Best Known Americans In The World'

None

None

The Angriest Citizen

Bachmann Licks Bush Yet Again

None

Eerie Simulacrum of Tragic American Hero Flying Delta Shuttle Today

None

None

Rudy Giuliani Steals Thatcher's Corpse!

Fashion Police State

AMBER ALERT: Ron Paul Supporter Has Kidnapped A Girl!

You Can Never Quarantine The Past

None

None

Radio Person Suing TV Star For Stealing Klingon Joke

None

We Will Try To End This Internet Fad By Promoting It To Death

None

None

We Must Destroy Iran With Large Bombs

None

America-Hating Religious Extremists Release New Video Threatening Americans

None

CREW Lists 22 Most Corrupt Lawmakers, 2 Grossest

Ditka Vs Congress

Even the Nazi Pope Has Had Enough of Condi

None

Mitt Outlines Ambitious Hill Strategy, Bitchin Inauguration Party, Self-Propelled Flying Machine

None

TimesSelect Ends, America Struggles to Remember Why It Once Cared About MoDo

Home Coming

Satellite of Love

Iraq Still Adorably Pretending to Have Sovereignty

None

Perhaps A Lame Online Stunt Will Bring Serious Attention To A Boring European Political Crisis

None

None

Sorry, D.C., No Vote For You In Congress, Again

None

Old Men Need Naps

Federal Reserve Lowers Rates On SPACE MONSTER INVASION CONCERNS

None

Condi's Pad

None

Why Does Rudy Want To Kill Our Brave Abortion Survivors?

None

Eat Up

None

Nebraska State Senator Sues Eric Clapton

'Times': New AG Not Exactly RFK II

90s Back, Worse Than Ever

Tomayto, Tomahto

GOP Frontrunners Also Hate White American Christian Evangelicals

Earth Attempts to Open Up, Swallow Ron Paul

None

When It Shoots Up The Dropper's Neck

Tavis Smiley To Debate Ron Paul

None

Ramstad Retiring Too Late to Help Us

None

Wingnuts Furious Over Bush's Liberal New York AG Nominee

None

Sally Field Still Making People Cringe

None

Havana Moon

None

Old Jazzbo Hippie Claims Cheney Just Invaded Iraq For The Oil

None

Meet Mike

Iraqis Kicking Out Our Mercenaries

None

If The Glove Don't Fit

Osama On MySpace?

'All He Did Is Go To Iraq ... He's a Human!'

None

Meet Your New Least Favorite Blogger

None

Trivia Night

None

Hey, To Do List Is Back Too!

BREAKING ... CONDI RICE SHARES HOME WITH A LIBERAL

Cartoon Violence Keeps It Short And Sweet

Nothing Wrong With Her A Hundred Dollars Won't Fix

Yep, That's The Real TIME Cover

None

Brave Buffalo Democrat Joins Endless Cummer Fun

None

Wonkette Sponsors Are Rolling Back the Surge

Reaganesque: Fred Thompson Is Already Senile

Bush Speech Full of Victorious Lies

Things That Are Possibly Broken

None

Top DoJ Official Resigns V Quietly

Hollywood Fred Thompson Even Lies About Going To Church With His Mother

None

Give the Surge Time to Work

Dead Presidents Who Aren't

None

None

None

None

WTF, Time?

Jonah Goldberg Confused By This Whole 'Fax' Technology

None

Today's Special E-Mail: 'Bush will deny US election in 2008'

Clean As A Whistle, Baby

None

John Edwards Wasting $150,000 To Address Bush Supporters On Cable Station Bush Supporters Don't Even Watch

None

Help Wanted, Nerds a Plus

None

Softballs

None

GAY PROSTITUTES, PAT

Novak: Freddie's Dead

Three's A Crowd

GQ's Most Powerful People Party

Hillary Day!

None

Adams Morgan Day!

Thompson Receives Support From America's Second-Worst Pundit Family

'Elle' Warns Readers: Rudy Will Marry, Cheat On You or Someone You Know

Try This Trick And Spin It

None

Affirmative Inaction

None

None

Someday, Eleanor Holmes Norton Might Be Slightly Less Useless

Sleepy Cell

Hollywood Fred Thompson Hates Baby Jesus!

None

Bush Junior Makes the Devil Sign Again, At 9/11 Ceremony

None

None

Yes, Virginia, There Is a Pat Buchanan

None

Bad Day for Prime Ministers

No Really We All Want To Pay More Taxes

None

Thank You For Those Items That You Sent Me

None

How Are You Helping to Find Osama bin Laden?

John 'Rotten' Lydon Begs America To Stop Rudy Giuliani

None

For This Year's 9/11, Bush Gives Up Iraq

Remember the Real Victims

None

Law School Textbook Rips Off Two Blogger Roman a Clefs

A Children's Treasury of Terrible 9/11 Art

Direct Some Giving

W-a-s-h i-n-g-t-o-n, baby, D.C.

None

Romney Campaign Totally Didn't Make That 'Phoney Fred' Website and Then Get It Removed From The Internet Overnight

The Troop Surge, As Seen From Fashion Week

None

Shocking Cursebird

'Post' Warns of Clinton Chinese Menace

Day Two of the Betray-Us Hearings

The Only Thing Flying Around The Pentagon This Year Is Bullshit

9/10 NEVER FORGET: World War III Has Apparently Started, In Mexico, And As Usual It's About Oil

Not Going To Mention You-Know-What

Ghost of Nixon Breaks Into Romney HQ

None

None

Rudy Giuliani Loves, Hates & Is The Mafia

None

None

OMFG Metro Section Is Back!

Breaking: Thompson Helped Some Terrorists

Today's Florida Republican Sex Criminal Actually Offed Himself

Why Not Move to Florida

Checking In With the Petraeus Report

Did General Petraeus 'Tap Toes In The Barracks Bathroom'?

None

None

None

Ring Them Bells

None

Larry Craig: 'If I Didn't Get Dick, You Must Acquit'

Good-bye To Our 'Queen of Hearts' & America's First Lady, Jane Wyman

None

It's Petraeus Time!

Senate to Lose Third of 'Chuck Caucus'

None

¡Cabron!

Le Bra Burners

UBL = RON PAUL??

None

Virginia Ranger

Roger Stone Presents the Worst Alibi Ever

Bush Just Taking Orders From Space Alien At White House

Cartoon Violence's Gone Fishin'

Four Losers Show Up At Fred Thompson Event

Time to Recover

Wonkette Sponsors Have Spoken to Arlen Specter

Piano Concerto No. 1, by Richard Milhous Nixon

None

Bush Makes A Million Screw-Ups In 10 Minutes

None

Mike Bloomberg's Online Virtual Fantasy Campaign

None

Eric Cantor's Choose Your Own Shitty Flash Adventure

Welcome to the Trail, Jackass

What, Does Manhattan Get All The Invasions?

None

Meet Your New President: Lee L. Mercer Jr.

None

The Only Larry Craig Story You Need to See

None

None

Ron Paul Elected President of Text Messages

None

Bill Richardson Shocker: New Mexico Spaceport Looks Like a Giant Vagina!

None

Mitt Romney Arrested For Acting Like An Asshole

Explosions!

None

Minneapolis Airport Police Conspiring To Destroy America's Western Ranches! Or Something ...

None

Teddy Boy Sings

Larry Craig to Retire Again For the Very First Time

Law & Order Guy Running for Something or Other

None

Let's Do What You Want For A Change

Okay, So Alberto Gonzales Quit To Spend More Time Fucking With Larry Craig

None

As Fred Thompson Goes, So Goes The Wonkette

Rudy's New America: Gay-Friendly North Mexico

None

Gruesome Rural Bear Drama Forced To Make D.C. Political Point

Your Congress, Illustrated

None

None

Gut Feelings

Brownback Fever Wipes Out NH

None

None

Strategize or Organize, It's Up to You

Steal This Idea

Someone (Or Some THING) Is Killing All The Congress People

None

Bill Clinton Used To Have Good Taste

Ohio Rep. Dead, Wikipedia Nazis Censor Terrible Truth

None

Cheney Tries To Finish Off New Orleans, With Nuclear Bombs

None

Yet Another Profile of Secret Power Behind Cheney Throne

Absolut Power

Subject: Scarier Than Scary

Rudy's Head, "Trunk" Held High

Presdident Still Basically Eats Like Little Kid

None

Twins!

Wonkette Commenter Proposes Unorthodox Larry Craig Theory

None

Courts Are For Bombing

None

Get Ready To Watch Lots of Boring Fred Thompson Acting Clips

We Already Miss Larry Craig So Much

None

The Cretin's Challenge: New Book Reveals Inner Bush

Guest Blogger Determined to Go Out with One Last Dig at Larry Craig

Meet Yet Another GOP Toilet Menace From Congress

Web Photoshoppers Selflessly Make Tearoom Senator Even Funnier

None

Mike Rogers, Weary of Saying I Told You So, Moves On to the Profit Stage

None

John McCain: Old and In the Way

None

Meet G. Harrold Carswell, the Larry Craig of the 1970s Who Nearly Became a Supreme Court Justice!

John Ashcroft's Wife Tongues Alberto Gonzales

None

Proving He's a True Republican, Mitt Expresses Love of 'Tube Steaks'

None

Spy Museum Wants You to Know It's Got Sex, Too!

Campaign Book Clearance Sale!

Yes, Yes, But is There an Airport Sexytime Bogstall in My Area?

None

They've Got to Use that Leftover Moonlanding Soundstage for Something

Bonzo Goes to Baghdad

NC GOP Commissioner Pays Whores with Checks, Uses Obviously Fake Porn Name

Alberto WHO?

Guest Blogger Promises Slow Yet Glittery News Day

None

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Wonkette Disclaimer

Wonkette Privacy Policy

Wonkette Contest Rules

Wonkette Contest Rules

Wonkette In The News

None

Thanks For All the Memories

None

Our Greatest President: Reagan Wishes For Space Monster Invasion

None

Friday Foto Fun: Putin Slobbers On Dinosaur Fish

None

Libtard Main Stream Media More Concerned With Right-Wing Senator's Sex Crime Than Washed-Up English Gay Singer's Sex Crime of Nine Years Ago

None

Enjoy Your Non-Socialist Day of Rest, Laborers!

None

What the Hell Happened Yesterday Evening?

None

None

None

Yes, You Know Me

IOWA GAY MARRIAGE 8/30/07-8/31/07

Who Will Be Next to Work With Scary Jim Webb?

None

None

Cartoon Violence Never Once Got Busy In A Burger King Bathroom

None

Mitt Romney Runs Like a Girl

Jumpers

None

Iraqi Insurgents Tragically Fail To Kill U.S. Lawmakers

None

Wonkette Sponsors Are Not Sorry

'Sudoku' Senator to Step Down?

DOJ Asks: Are You a Hack?

Money Is Speech, Except You Can Buy Things With It

None

CNN: Rudy Giuliani Using 9/11 As Campaign Photo Op

Fred Thompson Left a Telephone Message About Doing a Webcast About Announcing He'll Maybe Run For President Next Week

A New Reason To Hate Paultards

Today Is a Pride Parade

None

Who Will Protect Us From Public Handjobs

Let's All Laugh At Larry Craig's Interrogation Tape

None

Larry Craig Has Officially Become a Cartoon

None

Rock and Roll Hotel Anniversary Party feat. Andrew WK

We Can't Remember If It's News That Mitch McConnell & Lindsey Graham Are Supposedly Gay (Not With Each Other, That We Know Of, Just In General)

Victory!

Fred Thompson Just Called to Say He's Running

Everybody Is Freaking Out About Guys Getting Off In Restrooms

None

WMD Finally Found, In New York, Inside United Nations HQ

Rove Mooner Has a Posse

None

RNC Calls Hill Manchurian Candidate

Ripped From the Headlines

None

None

Convicts Don't Just Kill Themselves, You Know

Tucker Carlson: Another Tragic Victim of Sexual Assault

Small World After All

Tony Snow Sings

None

Larry Craig's Mixed-Up Muddled-Up Shook-Up Sex Scandal

Kinky Shit

None

George W. Bush Wishes New Orleans a Very Happy Katrina Birthday

Have You Heard About Our New President, Chuck Hagel?

Tucker Carlson: Defending Our Men's Rooms From the Gays

Bad, Naughty Boys

White House Staffers Celebrate Rove Departure by Fucking Up His Jaguar

The Secretary of State Yells At a Cashier

Ayad Allawi Subverting Two Democracies At Once

Life With Larry

None

Gay Larry Craig's Been Denying It Forever

None

None

Wide-Stance Liveblogging of Larry Craig's Statement

Selections From the Idaho 'Statesman' Larry Craig Piece That Amused Us For Various Reasons

Coke Or Pepsi?

David Vitter's Wife To Defend Larry Craig's Bathroom Sexytime

None

Drudge Makes Three Intentional Jokes/Puns, World Ends

None

Get Good With Dodd

None

Watch Barney Frank Avoid Outing Larry Craig!

None

Meet the Barbershop Bathroom Quartet

None

They Sing No More

GOP Consultant 'Love Triangle' Deaths Remain Totally Insane

None

Larry Craig Missed the Writing on the Airport Restroom Wall

Entire Metro System On Fire

Homosayswhat?

None

None

Idaho Values Alliance Will Have 'Hard Time Swallowing' Larry Craig News

America's Bravest

Alberto Gonzales is a Dick

Idaho Senator Larry Craig Arrested in Men's Room

Martians Also Angry At Bush Administration

Rove Mooner Wanted by the Secret Service

None

America Remembers Alberto

None

Despised, Incompetent Ghoul Is Top Pick For Attorney General

None

Alberto Gonzales Wanted For Questioning After Burglary At Chris Dodd's Office

Viva Gonzales

None

Beloved Conservative U.S.-Loving French President Also Hates America

None

Fidel Is Immortal

Fredo's Resignation Speech

HEY EVERYONE, GONZO FINALLY RESIGNED

Four More Years

None

Condi's Getting That Letterman Thing Fixed

Drug Store Truck Driving Man

None

Nation of Celeb-Lovin' Retards Reacts To Castro Death Rumors

None

Now DC's Bridges Are Collapsing

OMG BREAKING CASTRO IS MAYBE DEAD AGAIN!!!

None

Obama-Brownback-Paul '08!

None

Cops Admit Cops Caught Being Fake Protesters Are Cops

Tommy Thompson Is Not Forgotten

Cartoon Violence Is Squinting At It, But It Still Doesn't Really Look Like That

None

None

The Secret Life of Ralph Gonzalez

Feingold Implores Americans to Watch the Parking Meters

Wonkette Sponsors Have It! Do You?

None

Mysterious Florida Deaths Involve GOP Consultant, God Knows What Else

Iraqis From Mexico, Mexicans From Iraq

Reach Out and Plan Something

None

Guess Which "Family Impact Summit" Speaker We Are Most Excited For

None

None

Terror Queen Doesn't Actually Know Anything About Terrorism

None

None

Man Who Shot George Wallace Released From Prison In Time For 2008 Campaign

Area Protester Fooled by Satire

None

Michael Dukakis: GOP Will Blow Up Building 3 Weeks Before Election

None

None

Poorly Organized Party Metaphor For Entire Obama Campaign

George Will Warns of Coming Kander & Ebb-scored Nazi Menace

None

The Road to Hell is Paved With Babies

None

Reagan Fan Seeks Girl Too Stupid To Find Reagan's Wikipedia Entry

None

None

Boring Earmark Fight Turns Funny

None

Tell Me Lies Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

Karl Rove's Gay Dad Made His Son Fall in Love With Jeff Gannon

U.S. Generals Finally Admit They're Not In Iraq For 'Democracy,' Either

None

Nostalgic Trading Cards Remind Nation of Earlier Bush/Iran Shenanigans

I Really Get a Dirty Mind

Valerie Plame Added You As A Friend On Spookbook

Getting Ugly

None

How To Get Man Titties Just Like Putin

None

McCain Will Lose In 2010, Too

None

Congratulations to MSNBC For Remembering What President Bush Looks Like

Bush: Iraq Pretty Much Like Vietnam

Popularity Isn't Everything

Local Security Guard Defeats Terrorist Ghosts

It's a Gaffe

None

None

Beloved DC Think Tank Calls For Bush To Nuke Iraq and Become World Dictator

Pres. Reminds Minnesota That He Cares About Their Collapsing Bridges

Selected Top Drudge Stories of the Moment, Explained

None

The Terrorific Stylings of Fascist Terror Lord Rudy G

None

W4W International Needs You

None

Nation Cheers As NASA Shuttle Doesn't Explode

None

Beards For Everyone

Jesus Says: Stop Snitchin

None

Levin Joins Anti-Maliki Bandwagon

No Cape, No Tights, No Justice

None

None

Obama Disgusted By Vulgar Nation of YouTube Idiots

None

Rep. Filner's Dulles Rampage

Happy Birthday, Doctor President!

None

None

Bush In Canada Selling America To Mexico

None

Hero Insect Scales Mount Dodd

None

Ron Paul Geeks Will Soon Start Spaming Other Candidates

None

Mitt Romney: A Folksy Throwback To Mormon Millionaires of the 1950s

None

Purple Hearts, Stars, and Horseshoes

Breaking: Musicians Have Opinions

Bad Year for a White House Wedding

Pennsylvania Avenue is just like Tienanmen Square

None

Ex-Fatsos

Watch Ron Paul Yell At This Fat Fascist Guy

The "Beckham" Party

None

Pouncing Down the Avenue

None

None

Jenna & Henry: The Way They Were

None

Tony Snow: Only In It For the Money

None

Heritage Foundation Constructing Moat Around Itself

None

Mike Huckabee Defeats Effete Liberal Media

None

Denny Hastert Bravely Blames Americans For His Failure

None

Cartoon Violence Learns Something New Every Day

Lawn Care

Wonkette Sponsors Are Expecting!

None

FBI Director's Notes Either Heavily Redacted or Full of Embarrassing Typos

Finally, a Reason to Vote for Bill Richardson

Let My People Go

None

Minstrel Show

None

Ben Stevens' New Dream Job

None

How Pregnant Is Jenna Bush?

None

Organize For Dodd!

None

Jenna Bush To Marry Rich White Rove Staffer

None

Another Sad Old Republican Rep. Retiring

None

Karl Rove Calls Somebody Else 'Effete'

None

Rudy Wants You To Forget That His Kids Hate Him & Are Voting For Obama

None

None

Even Autocrats Get the Blues

None

Dying to Build a Bridge

Dizzy Gillespie

What the Fuck Is Wrong With Rudy Giuliani?

Bachmann on Fact-finding/Baby-Collecting Mission Overseas

Viva la Rummy

None

Condi, Karen, and Cal: Friends in Diplomacy

None

None

CIA, Vatican, DCCC, Fox News, New York Times All Just Fucking Around On Wikipedia

Fundraiser Wine

Ron Paul Supporters Forming Domestic-Partnership Revolutionary Army In D.C.

None

Edwards Offers Dim Hope of Not-So-Awful Future; Rudy Says 9/11 a Million Times

Wade In a Little Deeper

None

Rummy Resigned Early

Hillary Clinton To Star In Lesbian TeeVee Show

None

'The Atlantic's' Rove Story Demonstrates Mastery of Accidental Timing

None

Fred Thompson: Still Not Really Running

Rove-a-palooza

Sincerely, Ho Chi Minn

Dennis Hastert: A Life in Funny Pictures

Anyone Dumb Enough To Fall For This Deserves To Be Caught

Pissed Off Snowman Vows To Torture Mitt Romney In a Rooftop Dog Carrier

None

Here's Vladimir Putin, Half Naked

Wikipedia Vandalism Proves Republicans Hate Harry Potter

None

Mitt Romney Wants To Be President Even More Than He Wants To Do Business In Iran

None

U.S. Government Now Warning U.S. Government of Imminent Imperial Collapse

None

Pat Leahy Returning To Secret Comic Book Identity

Rove Now More Powerful Than You Can Possibly Imagine

None

Rock Out With John Cox Out!

None

More to Die in Minneapolis

Men's Fashion Mag Ranks Most Insufferable People in DC

To the Tune of a Gajillion Dollars

Godspeed You Black Emperor

None

Obama Poses for GQ to Dispel 'All Style, No Substance' Talk

None

Rise of the Machines

The Mitt in the Gray Flannel Suit

None

Dick Cheney Used To Be Kind of Honest

None

None

How Can Fancy Lettuce Boy Appeal To Poor People?

Craziest Baldwin Endorses Dumbest Republican

None

Mitt Romney Still Hates Snowmen, America

None

First Lady Grace Coolidge Would Like You To Meet Her Pet Raccoon

None

Sad, Poor Americans Finally Give Up On Republicans, God

None

The Most Important Month of All

None

All Hail President Romney!

Karl Rove's Political Career: 1993-2007

Rove Heads Home to Eat Offspring

Demanding Truth from Secretaries

None

None

Have Hope, Hungry America: Mitt Romney Will Feed You!

Ron Paul Will Repeal the 16th Amendment in One Term or Your Pizza's Free

None

None

Everybody Loves Rudy, Especially the Gays

Federal Reserve Buys Up All the Crap Nobody Wants

None

Tough S.O.B.s

Who Said It?

None

None

Republican YouTube Debate To Finally End Miserable Democracy Experiment

None

Nicolas Sarkozy Also Running For President of America

None

None

Cartoon Violence Sees No Evil

Rich Girl

Wonkette Sponsors Are Gunning For Slick Nick

None

America's Greatest Pretend Rep Will Return

The Great Leap Forward

The HRC DeGayte, Part II

Liveblogging the Gaybate

None

Shock Troops and Awe

None

Religious Fanatics Attack U.S. Troops In Iraq

The Show is the Rainbow

None

TSA Detains Man for Anti-American T-Shirt

Join Us At 9 For Gay Hijinks

Parking Garage Tragedy Claims the Lives of Four Cars

Haven't You Always Wanted to Work for the IRS

None

None

Terrorist Mexican Child Molesters In Post-9/11 Surge!

None

AT&T Webcast Censorship Briefly Reminds Underemployed 40-Year-Old Drywall Hangers of Grunge

None

Bush Bravely Vows To Kill Everyone In Bridge Collapses

None

Laura & Jenna Bush 'Writing' Book For George

None

Girl's Got Rhythm

Bob Allen Swears He's Not Racist, Not Queer, Just Likes Park Bathrooms

None

World War III Briefly Delayed; Mexico Apologizes For Mocking Our Retarded Beauty Queen

None

Tough Questions For Walnuts

Bush Sr. Living Out His Last Days in Shame

Good News If Your Name Rhymes With "Cockheed Blartin"

President Healthier Than Dollar

None

Love Crimes

Second-Tier Republican Candidates Counting On Elaborate Mutual Self-Delusion

None

None

The Government Ain't Telling You Nothing

Second Life Economic Collapse To Offer Preview Of Real-Life Economic Collapse

Here's to the Lobbyists Who Lunch

Romney Sons Campaign For Dad Over Here So They Don't Have To Campaign For Him Over There

Obama Girl Still Gyrating Away at the Behest of Her Masters

None

Rudy Baffled By His Own Religion's Theology

Stop Snitching

Lonesome John Edwards: Phony

Gingrich Sort Of Vaguely Makes Sense; Nation Terrified

None

None

Vote For Hillary To Begin The Bloodbath!

Indiana Perv Busted for Heading Young Republicans

Váyase

My Other Car Is A Bald Eagle

None

Rich People to Spend Day in Uncomfortable Shoes

Ron Paul Doesn't Care About (Giving Medals to) Black People

None

Surprise! America's First Black President Is A Dead Republican

None

None

Dope Smoking Morons to Join Regular Morons at FBI

BREAKING: Some Candidates From Mars, Others From Venus

None

Fred Thompson: Just Like George Washington!

None

Cowed American Workers Love The Boss's Favorite Candidate!

Li'l Giuliani Loves Barack Obama, Seagram's Coolers

Rock Steady

None

Your Mission: Stop Congressmen From Abusing Multimedia

Nexus Of Catholic-Protestant Hate Moves From Belfast To Iowa

Protesting Hippies To Be Forced To Taste Awful Vegan Meals Twice

Mitt's Mellow Meltdown

Heroic Immigration Officials Save America From Chav Menace

Vay-cay

A Spiritual Response to the 35W Bridge Tragedy

Gun Show

None

Rudy Much More Popular With Gay Mafia Than Regular Mafia

None

Ah, To Be Young, Gifted, and Conservative

None

TSA To Make Life Slightly Less Pleasant, Again

Rudy's Daughter Hot For Barry

Newt Begs World To Pay Attention To Him; Wonkette Obliges

One Toke

None

None

Nats Unimpressed By So-Called "Faith" Of Jews, Muslims

Your 2008 Bumper Stickers

Shocker: Political Process Marked By Politics

None

States Taking Immigration Laws Into Own Hands

Nicolas Sarkozy: Awesome French President, Or AWESOMEST French President?

Politics Will Kill You

Late Night Cable

Happy Almost Barry Hussein's Birthday!

Rip It Up

None

Terror Has a New Face

I Know Who Killed Health Care

None

Terrorists Identified as Terrorist 'Historians' In Replica of 1776 American Submarine

None

Cartoon Violence Pledges Its Heart And Soul To Mother Russia

Captain Nemo & Crew Captured At Brooklyn Docks

None

Everyone At Fault in Bridge Disaster

None

Pentagon Bravely Arming Iran Again

None

Ohhhh, You Didn't Mention He Was a Big Scary Black Guy Who Scared You

Wonkette Sponsors Have Fists of Steel

None

McCain's Long Road To Obscurity

None

Kids Love Newt

None

Something Interesting Happened on C-Span!

Recess of Fire

Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr.'s Hands Are Registered Weapons

Uncomfortable Places

We Keep America Working

None

None

None

Do You Fear the Kind of Thing That Just Happened? You Have Crazy 'Bridge Phobia'

None

Make Cash & Meet Babes On the Beach, at Gitmo!

None

Corrupt Rep. Calls for Do-Overs on Earmarks

None

Pundit Picks Nose

None

Republicans Sick of Rudy, Walnuts, Fred, Newt, Mitt and Whoever Else Is Or Isn't Running

None

Symbol of Basic Governmental Competence Collapses

None

Horrible Monsters Attack Clintons' Former Home

One Stolen Night of Bliss

None

None

Candidate "Girls" Now Officially Single Dumbest Aspect of '08 Election

Fox Loves Rudy!

Synonyms For "Liar"

Making Lemonade

David Frum Has Concerns About Minorities

None

J.J. Walker: "It's time that Americans...Go All In"

None

Everything's Just a Lame Online Diversion These Days, Including the 'New Deep Throat'

What to Wear

Dear Doctor

None

None

Wacky Baptist Preacher Arrested For Dozens of Sex/Drug Crimes

None

Rumsfeld: 'I Do Not Recall Ordering Hit On Pat Tillman'

Hippies Beaten

None

Saudis Might Acknowledge Existence of Iraq

Long Live The Queen

None

Norm Coleman Is a Stupid Dirty Hippie

None

Do Not Want!

None

None

Ha Ha, Ted Stevens Is So Screwed

Animals Need Assistants

OMG Crazy TeeVee First Lady And/Or Movie Witch Sorta Like Crazy Actual First Lady!

Iraq Contractors to Have Hooker-in-Residence

None

None

Meet Your New First Lady, Bill Clinton!

None

Left-Wing Nuts Bug Right-Wing Nut

None

White House, Like Nation, Not Listening to Arlen Specter

Who Ordered the Execution of NFL/Army Hero Pat Tillman?

None

None

Diaperman David Vitter's Fave Local Hooker Says DC Madam Ran Whore Ring

None

Ken Starr's Law Firm Has a Crush On Hillary

None

Old-Fashioned Southern Democrat Generously Gave Away His Bribes

Gonzales' Whiny Speech to DoJ Employees

Come Out, Come Out

None

Carter Embarks on Fast Food Tour of the South

Ted Stevens' Seussian House Raided by FBI, IRS

Brown Nose

None

None

Cheese Bombs Apparently Not Going to Kill Us All

Mike Gravel Wants You to Have to Vote Even More Often

None

Hey Everybody, Al Gore Junior Pled Guilty To Having Dope

Let the Sunshine In

None

None

Meet Rudy Giuliani's Latest Wife

None

Fred Thompson, Heartbeaker

None

Lipstick Lesbians Say 'Go Ron Paul!'

None

Richy-Rich Obama Confuses Iowa Working People With His Fancy Lettuce Talk

None

Hail To The Tee

None

Kindly Old VP Wishes He, Too, Had Been Evil Despot

Number of People Writing 'Note' Imitations Now Eclipses 'Note' Readership

Hill's Awkward College Letters Yours For the Mocking

Lying is the New Black

None

Nation Survives Brief Bush Presidency

Maliki to Sunnis: Drop Dead

None

They Walk Among Us

Democrat Lite

Obama's 'Message of Hope' Is Just That He Hopes To Be President

Hillary's Hair: A Very Special Look Back

None

Elizabeth Edwards Likes It Rough

None

Cheney Having Heart Surgery Tomorrow, Bush Will Briefly Be 'President'

None

None

Cartoon Violence Goes For The Gut

NASA Also Lost $94 Million -- Possibly In Space, Probably Drunk

None

Only Darkness Has the Power

None

Wonkette Sponsors Are Thirsty For the Truth, and Also Vodka

Romney Outrage: Paying People To Support Him?

GOP Hopefuls Tramping Dirt Down

Lie to Me, Baby

Gonzo's Lies Make Baby Jesus Cry

Philippe Reines, Hottie, is Sorry

Guy Who's Not Actually Running For President Isn't Raising Enough Money To Run For President

None

None

DRUDGE DURNK

WTF NASA

Which Congressman From Ohio Uses Hookers?

Everyone Needs Interns

None

None

Uppity Dems Demand More People Be Brought In to Yell At Gonzales

None

ABC News DC Bureau Attacked by Powder

None

None

Hot Conspiracy Theorist Gal Hates On Rudy, Fred & the Secret Plans With Canada/Mexico

None

The Whole Country Has Semen On Its Dress

None

Karl Rove To Ignore Senate Supoena

Down With the Kids

None

Breaking: Was Gonzales... Less Than Truthful???

If It's Thursday, Two More McCain Staffers Have Quit

Abort And Feel Good Doing It

None

New French President Grabs Some Young Boob

Hooligans!

None

None

None

DC Media Types Hot for Embarrassing Self-Promotion

John Edwards Dons Spandex, Braves Crowds of Bloodthirty Iowans

None

None

Maybe It All Works Out

Please Contribute To Californians For Obama (Not Affiliated With Barack Obama's Campaign In Any Way)

TSA: Terrorists May Penetrate Our Defenses With Delicious, Fattening Dairy Products

None

Wacky New House Judiciary Panel Finds Miers, Bolten In Contempt

None

Powerful Lesbian Will Be President

None

Debate Gun Nut Invites Joe Biden On a Hunting Trip

None

Cleansing Ceremonies

Mike Gravel Aide in Second Life Vandalism Shocker

Letters From a Nut

George and Nouri: Friends For Life, However Short That May Turn Out to Be

Racist Flier Sent to Blogs, Perhaps South Carolinians

Laugh it up, Chuckles

Catching Up With Catholic Priests

Young Republicans Leader Pleads Guilty To Rape Attack

World's Worst Contest

Blink and You'll Miss It

None

None

Poll: Everyone Sick of This Shit

Vote For Your Favorite Local Non-Broadcast Media Employee!

Masters of the Universe, Defenders of Wildlife

Bob Novak's 'Prince of Darkness' Party

'David Vitter Got Caught With His Pants Down'

None

Hillary Clinton Can't Be President Because of Her Common-Law Marriage Or Something

None

Watch Joe Biden Call the Crazy Redneck a Mental Case!

None

Rudy's Coke Addict/Coke Dealer Resigns As State Treasurer

None

Wonkette Commenter Has Unpleasant View of Nation's Future

None

GOATSE Picture Shown In Debate, Nation Collapses

None

Cindy Tells Me

Mitt Romney's Top Aides Will Save Earth From SPECTRE & Klingons

What's Not To Like About These Crazy Kids

Iraq Forever!

None

Gonzo Forever

Take a Number, Akbar

None

Please Kill Us: YouTubers Are Idiots, Part III

Liveblogging the Vidiots: CNN-YouTube Part II

Liveblogging the Revolution ... Oh Wait, Actually Just Another Stupid Debate

Your Move, Creep

We Told You So

Fred Thompson: He is Famous

None

None

None

Americans Say Americans Are Racists

None

Lou Dobbs Has Lost His Mind

Boy-Molesting Priest Also Giuliani Consultant

None

It's YouTube Idiots Vs. Debating Democrats, Tonight!

None

None

None

No One Liks Condi

Mitt Romney: 'Quit Crying About 9/11, Sissy'

None

Miers & Bolten Gettin' Charged With Contempt

None

If the Bushes Hate Ron Paul, Then America Loves Ron Paul

None

Left Behind

World Forever Changed by Idiots Owning Consumer Electronics

None

Happy Birthday Monica!!

None

Juleanna Glover Weiss is Available

News That Isn't

Somehow, World Survived 3 Hours of 'President Cheney'

YouTube Debate: 'Uh Yeah I Gotta Question For Da President'

None

For Self-Defense Purposes Only

None

None

Bush to Undergo Colonoscopy: What Do You Need to Know?

GOP Update: Forgotten Soft-Porn Actress Endorses Divorced Abortionist Fascist

None

The Chaste is On

President Makes CIA Stop Abu Ghraibing Everyone

None

Rudy Reveals Secret War!

What Next For the Bush/Cheney Administration? Maybe Guillotines!

Cartoon Violence Probably Won't Survive The Next Fifteen Months

None

Vitter Resignation Watch: National Review, Fox News People Say 'Resign, Creep'

None

BREAKING ... CHENEY OFFICIALLY BECOMES PRESIDENT

None

White House Solves U.S. Attorney Scandal

The Prince of Stop Bugging Me

Wonkette Sponsors Aren't Sorry For Nothing They've Done

Hicks Need Ammo

Obscure Reaganite Sends Dire Warning From the Distant Past

None

Baghdad Hill Undermines War Effort

Money Isn't Everything

None

Patronize an Intern

Assists Appreciated

Famous Person Spotted in Washington

Minority Report

None

Exciting Blind Item

None

None

Pentagon Hack Whines About Hillary, Iraq

Vitter's Whoremongering Makes Christians 'A Little Horny'

None

FORMER PRES. BUSH CONTEMPLATES SUICIDE

None

Costumed Fascists: Rudy Giuliani Finds His Political Base

Go To Bed, Old Man

None

Pissed Off About Iraq? Bush Will Seize Your Bank Account

'Post' Makes Public Official Cry

Fred Thompson Didn't Personally Perform Abortions

None

'I'm Not Going To Talk About My Campaign'

None

Congressional Moms Destroying Both Nation, Own Families

On Snoozing and Losing

None

The Rock

None

Night of the Living Dead

BREAKING: PRESIDENT KUCINICH ILL

Gay Traitors' Gay-ness Not to Blame For Treason, as They Weren't Actually Gay

None

Energy Task Force Lists Revealed: Entire Policy Shaped by Al Gore, the Lorax

None

Hi Sexy

None

All Campaigns Fueled by Overpriced Swill

Oh No, Gerald Ford Also Died Today

None

Bill and Hillary Clinton Have Never Felt Shame

None

Bob Allen Would Probably Enjoy Prison, At Least

None

You Might As Well Live

Hillary Campaign Insists They'd Rather Kill Edwards Than Help Him

Cot Between Iraq and a Hard Place

None

Cap File's White Party

None

Duke Cunningham Barely Even Had Sex With His Prostitutes

None

Over-Excited Senators Fail to Make Good on Promise to Stay Up All Night

Brews and Hos

None

A Disgusted Nation Begs Wendy Vitter Not To Chop Off Diaperman's Dick

None

Hey, How About Shut Up?

None

Wearin' Diapers Ain't a Sin, Except For Full-Grown Men

None

Who Is Responsible For the Kinda Funny Giuliani Videos?!?

None

Diaperman Vitter Gets No Love In Louisiana

Mid Level is Our Favorite Level

None

Mitt Romney Is a Creepy Fucker

None

Jim Nicholson and the Great Ohio VA Hooker Mystery

Fox News Viewers Don't Like the Daily Kos

Hillary Will Get U High

None

None

'Our Marriage Is Stronger Every Day'

None

Vitter's Diaper-Clad Love Child Toddles Among Us

McClintock!

None

Matt Drudge Refuses to Report on Boyfriend Mitt's Makeup

None

'Post' Feature: How to Lose a War

Thanks But No Thanks

Capitol Hill People: We Need Your Help Exposing the Heinous Sins of David 'Diaperman' Vitter

None

None

Filthy Whoremonger Scum-Sucking Diaperman David Vitter Won't Resign

None

Politics, Upstate New York Style

How Much To See Some Ankle?

None

Senate Hosts Pajama Party!

None

A Memo From Nixon

None

None

U.S. Military Overwhelmingly Supports ... Ron Paul

None

Thomas Jefferson's Muslim Congressman Calls Bush Hitler

None

Triple A

A Very Special LNS Addendum

Dems Are Commies Again!

If We Ever Meet Irving Kristol We Are Going to Knee Him in the Balls

Barry, Call Me!

You Lose

iWalnuts

None

Republican Wife-Beater Has Notable Lack of Sexual Perversions

Free as a Bird

None

"This Should be Fun and Make LNS Look Really Good"

None

Senator Bill Nelson Used To Have Awesome Sex In the Military

None

Councilman Caught With Naked 15-Year-Old Boy & Pills!

None

CARTOON VIOLENCE PRESENTS PRESENTS! THIS FRIDAY -DAY! CARTOON SMACKDOWN -DOWN!

None

Why Not Spend It On a Hooker and Bordeaux Instead?

NASA Also Can't Spell the Shuttle's Name

None

A Family Event

None

World's Lamest Gangsta Easily Distracted by French Cheese, Wine

None

Creepy State Rep. Brings Endless Cummer Magic to NC

Wonkette Sponsors Will Still Love You Tomorrow

None

McCain Retreats to NH to Promise Never to Retreat From Iraq

Plan B Ushers In New Era of Immorality, Hot Sex

Contempt of Congress and Other Things We All Share

The City Paper/LNS Fallout

None

Family Research Council Lobbyist Also On DC Madam's List

Rubes Convinced Dems Worship Their "God"

Benchwarmer Bush

None

Hey Guess Who Took This Picture of Florida Rep. Bob Allen

None

Summer of GOP Perverts Has a New Name

None

New World Bank Head Already Almost as Reviled as Wolfie

None

Lieberman: U.S. Will Back Israeli Strike On Iran

None

None

McCain's Iowa Staff Quits, Too

None

Changing the Tone

House Panel Yells At Miers' Empty Chair

None

Chertoff's Sphincter Tells Chertoff's Gut To Calm Down

President Heroically Makes Child Cry

Bush Commutes Captain America's Sentence

Open Ended Benchmarks

Giant Bloodthirsty Badgers Eating People In Iraq

Let's Do a Haruspicy On Chertoff's Entrails

None

Global Warming: Not All Bad!

Terminally Ill Child Seizes Presidency

None

Feds Seize Rogue Presidential Library

None

Pentagon Can't Even Give Away Its Secret War Plans

None

None

None

Bachmann Iraq Trip Nets Her Sixteen New Children, Renewed Confidence in War Plan

Linda Tripp & Monica Lewinsky Had a Baby!

None

Sweat Stains

None

White House Reporters Giggle At Bush's Funny

None

Gay Sweaters Cost Walnuts Primaries

None

Lonesome & Ugly Journalists Also Rent Hookers, Maybe

None

Diaperman David Vitter Likes His Diapers

None

Abstinence Day

John McCain Trolling Blogs With Anti-Thompson Screeds

None

Eight Simple Rules for Being the Surgeon General

Wall to Walnuts

None

Breaking: It Takes Nearly $5 Million to Keep Cheney Alive

None

Al Qaeda Is You!

None

Civil Rights Group Kills, Buries Innocent Word

Work Hard for the Money

Rudy Writes the Red Cross a Check

None

Finally, Brave Congress Will Investigate iPhones

None

Chinese FDA Head Killed

None

Beware, Conservatives! Fred Thompson Will Break Your Heart

None

Oh Hey, Douchesack Is On TeeVee

None

Nazi Pope: Only Catholics Are Christians

None

Hungry and the Wolf

Go to Bob Novak's Tea Party

None

Mrs. Vitter to Mutilate Whore-Lovin' Husband

If It's Tuesday, There's Verifiable Proof of Gonzo Lying

Run For President, Everyone Else Is

None

Louisiana Senator Admits To Screwing a Hooker!

Dogs Ride Inside

None

Canadian War Ships Block Northwest Passage From Americans

None

Liberal Manhattan-Dwelling Cross-Dressing Ferret-Face Would Like To Know More About This 'NASCAR'

None

Hey, Remember This Guy?

None

None

Also: A Practicing Homo Sapiens

None

Straight Talk Express To Drive Off Metaphorical Cliff, Burst Into Real Flames?

None

Hillary or Cheney Behind Obama Office Break-In

Rick Santorum Will Personally Terrorize America

None

Chinese Fraudsters Insult Presidential Offspring; WWIII Imminent

Iraq War To End In 2061

None

George Stephanopoulos: Brave Tool of Conventional Wisdom

Happy Watermelon Month, Senators!

None

Foreigners Have Much To Teach America About Smoking, Drinking

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

None

Irish Bookie Teaches World Real Meaning Of Integrity

Analysis: Americans A Bunch Of Ungrateful Whiny-Pants

Kerry Still Wants Your Money

Mitt Romney: Anal Intruder

None

Why Is This Man Smiling?

Peggy Noonan Saw a Mexican

None

MSNBC Graphics Department Acknowledges Existence of Second America

A Gracious Nation Wishes the President a Happy Birthday

'Post' Wants You to Throw Lamest Party Ever This Weekend

Grateful Death to the Infidel

Al Gore's 'Live Earth' To Feature Crappy D.C. Component

None

None

Bein' Prezident's Hard Work

None

A Bridge Too Farce

Everybody Wants Bush and/or Cheney To Resign/Be Impeached

Cartoon Violence In The Lions' Den

Wonkette Sponsors Can't Believe They're At Work Today

Who Will Be Iowa's Tanc Girl (or Boy!)

Bloomberg Refuses to Tell Bloomberg What Bloomberg's Doing

Rep. Ingersol Murders a Hobo

Do Snakes Piss Low To The Ground?

None

But They All Lose To Waterson & Schwarzenegger

V-Shaped Things

None

Finally, a Campaign Ad For the Fascist In Us All

MySpace, a Place For Patriotic Exhibitionist Retards

None

Thank You Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin

None

God Shed His Rage On Thee

None

Nation Stunned by Anti-Polk Vandalism

Scooter Libby Has Paid His Debt To Society

Curse of the Mekong

None

I'll Take Punctuality

No-Nonsense Straight-Talkin' Prosecutor Nearly Fucked Up Watergate Hearings

Another NASA Vehicle Having Trouble Landing

BREAKING ... GUY WITHOUT EYEBROWS ENDORSES HILLARY

Born on the 4th of July

Corporate Terror Still Sucks

Terrorists Win, Statue of Liberty Remains Closed

Happy Independence Day, Get the Hell Out

This Is My United States of Whatever

None

Republicans Too Busy Hating Terrorists to Raise Money

Internet Videos to Destroy Democracy For Good

None

The Drumbeat of Freedom

Crappy Concert, Stupid Events Mark Nation's Saddest July 4th

The Modernist Society @ Bourbon

When In the Course of Human Events It Becomes Necessary to PARTY

Ride the Wind

None

Free Scooter (Symbolically)

Jim Gilmore Pulls 'Eye Surgery' Campaign Stunt

Welcome to the New-ish Wonkette

Happy Football, Money, Jay Leno & Celine Dion Day!

Almost Kilt a Man

No One Who Speaks German...

Make Your Voice Ignored

President Probably the Type Who Gives Gift Cirtificates For Birthdays

Honor Among Thieves

Happy Almost Fourth of July, Losers!

And Justice For All

Rumors On The Internets: And People Call Me Traitor To My Face

Justice Served Yet Again: Scooter Sentence Commuted!

All Aboard the USS Dingbat!

Cry, Cry, Cry

Ron Paul Dresses As Poorly As His Internet Fans

Majority of Americans Now UnAmerican; Nation Renamed UnAmerica

BONG HiTS 4 JESUS: The Game

Best Part of Waking Up

Weekend At Bushies

Scooter's Going Up the River

Shamed DC Mayor Returns Sack of iPhones

Cosmetic Changes to Metro System Outrage Old People

Tancredo Loves Guns

Decrepit Old Senators Thrilled to Have Free Doctor Again

Not A Virgin Anymore

DC Mayor Gets His iPhones Delivered; Suck It, Philadelphia!

Dog Day Afternoon

But I Won't Be Worried Long

Mucho Trabajo

Last Days of Disco

Fred Thompson Rumor Watch

Yeah She's a Beautiful Loser

John McCain Is Desperate

BREAKING ... HOORAY, THE PRESIDENT RESIGNS!!!!

Beloved Hamas Mouse Rewarded With 72 Minnies

Ken Mehlman's Roof Party

I'm a Lot Like You Were

Meet Duncan, the Perfect Voter

Wolfowitz Bids Farewell, Promises To Screw Up Something Else Soon

iPhone Lemmings Line Up For NSA Surveillance

Cartoon Violence Accidentally Took The Brown Acid

Mitt Romney Swears Those Abu Ghraib Prisoners 'Enjoyed It'

Wonkette Sponsors Will Hear the Case

Supreme Court to Decide Against Gitmo Detainees in 5-4 Decision

Bush Is a Loser

Viva Arbusto

Round 2 of the Dem Debate: Pandering Pandemonium!

Tonight They Care About Black People, But 17 Months From Now ...

Time To Feel Uncomfortable, White Liberals!

Via Con Dios, Jorge

John Paul Stevens Old, Baked

Bush Wishes Castro Would Die and Iraq Would Disappear

The Economist: 'Hang In There, American Losers'

Current SCOTUS Make-Up Simplifies Jobs of Graphics Departments Everywhere

Nixon Blamed For Poisoned China Crap

Have You Always Wanted to Reach Out?

Batman of the People

Scooter Becomes Nation's 2,200,000th Prisoner!

CHENEY RESIGNS!!!!!!!

July 4 Recipe: Freedom Fries & Bald Eagle Pie!

Jews Sorta Like Bloomberg, Even Though He Won't Suck Up To Them

Senate Pretends To Kill Immigration Bill Again

The Polo Shirt of Lost Causes

(There's Gonna Be a) Constitutional Showdown!

Denny's Isn't Just For Milkshakes

Republican Interns Are Already Bored At Work

Tom DeLay Still Innocent

Mitt Romney Will Be a Great Commander-In-Chief of Abu Ghraib

Shamnesty Is 4 Fagz!

Free At Last

McCain's Prospects Sink From Third To Dead

Artcade Launch Party

The Chocolate Wars

Dick Says Drink Up!

Senate Subpoenas White House, Cheney House

Capitolism

Guy With the Shirt

Remember, the CIA Only Did Bad Things a Long Time Ago!

Farewell, Tony Blair

My CIA Can Torture the Hell Out of Your CIA

The CIA's Darkest Secrets Revealed Redacted

Ciao, Tony

Trying Working a Day In Your Life

Bob Woodward Is Freaking Out the Hippies

The Capitol File "Little Black Book" Party

John McCain Will Get the Jews Who Did 9/11

It's a Miracle! Lady Bird Johnson Still Alive!

Hideous Blue Jacket Secret Source of Hillary's Power?

NO UR DOING IT WRONG

Senate To America: Ha Ha, Better Learn Spanish!

Mother's Milk of Politics

Goofin' With the Bees

UPDATE: Interwebs Won't Actually Have Any Effect On Anything

Democrats Lose Again

Take Out Some Insurance

It's the Jews

Please Stand By

First Amendment Watch

Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo etc. etc.

The Evil Poll

Black Men In Suits All Look Alike

Republicans Now Getting Stuffed Into Congressional Lockers

Monsieur Romney Also a Draft Dodger

This Way Comes

Nation of Retards

Multi-Level Marketing

The Cheney Story

Oklahoma May No Longer Be a Shining Beacon of Hope and Joy

We Won't Have a Bald President

On the Radio, Mohammed's Radio

DC Explores New Venues For City Meetings

Fun With Earmarks!

You Seem to Have Turned on America's Favorite Marine

King of the Bongo

18,000 Ways to Leave Your Lover

Weekend Forecast: Hot, With a Chance of Cheney Starting Another War

Mitt Romney Gets Busted For Pretend Policemen

Well It's 1 2 3 4, Take the Elevator

Bush To Destroy World In 13 Hours, 20 Minutes

Cartoon Violence Heads Down To The Elephant Graveyard

Everybody On Earth Hacking the Pentagon For the Hell of It

Democrats Support the Wrong Troops

Wonkette Sponsors Want to Know Where the Ice Cream Social Was

This Week in Pride

CIA to Distract From Current Crimes With Reports of Old Crimes

George W. Sheehan

Underground Hip-Hop Duo Suddenly Controls White House

Better Late Than Never

Breaking: Vice President's Office Breaks Off, Forms Own Government

'Who Is Going To the Senate Ice Cream Social?'

Desert or Dance

Take Our Jobs and Fill Them

BREAKING ... NEXT DEBATE MIGHT BE PRETTY GOOD

Emma Edwards Betrays Father, Elizabeth Trolls Blogs

Bush Finally Hated More Than Carter

Geronimo's Great Grandson Demands Skull Back From Bushes

Poochie

Vatican Declares Death Is the Only Escape For Kennedys

Love Is Like a Cigarette

Condi Rice Sorta Barely Nods Her Head To Music

Mike Bloomberg Considering Not Not Running For Not Non-President

Straight Outta Basra

FBI Very Courteous To Osama Bin Laden & His Family

Lil' Mitt Wants Your Money

Tommy Thompson Appoints Colin Powell to be Secretary of the State of Make-Believe

Liver and Soul

George W. Bush Would Like the Negroes To Clean Up

Sometimes They Come Back, Again

Frist to Conduct His Terrible Experiments on Expendable Ivy Leaguers

Mark Foley Is Getting Desperate

Shootout at the Walter Reed Army Hospital

A-Well-a Everybody's Heard About the Bird

Meet Your New First Lady ... (Just Kidding)

They're Not Booing, They're Saying "Let's Elect a Wooooooooooman"

Please Appoint Us to Run the Smithsonian

Cuba Libre?

Giuliani to Tackle Spending, Sodomize it With a Billy Club

Americans Also Shorter Than Everybody Else

Everybody's Independent

Giuliani Campaign Chairman Caught Running Crack Distribution Ring

Thompson Papers Reveal Fundamental Misunderstanding of Barnyard Analogies

A Short Guide To Iraq

Get Off the Couch and Try Working For a Living, Hippies

From the Fires of the Homeless, From the Ashes of the Gays

Iraq & the Housing Crash: Totally the Same!

Couch Surfing

Hill's Campaign Song Revealed!

Same Ship, Different Rat: Budget Director Quits White House

French & Mexican Socialists All Getting Divorced

Great Moments In Objective Journalism

Congress Refuses to Disclose Earmarks to CNN Interns

President Samuel David Cheney to Oversee Opening of Dulles Rail Link

Things That Are Still Illegal

Mike Gravel Hopes He Dies Before He Gets Old

Faggot: The Play (Launch Party)

Shattered Hopes and Dreams

Hill Staffers Bravely Debate Which Party Is Uglier

Americans Want Fictional Democratic President

John Edwards Finds New Hapshire Voters to be Convenient Tissues

Former Corrupt Admin Official Offer to Lobby for Free

Happy 35th Anniversary, Watergate Burglary!

Plumber's Here

Meet America's Creepiest Candidates!

Laws Don't Apply To Jim Webb

Barry Hussein's New Pal

Bush Appointees Impress Everyone, Accomplish Nothing

New Immigration Bill Means Healthier Lawns

Drudge Flash! Bill Clinton is Osama bin Laden

Drudge Finds Mind For the Sole Purpose of Losing It Again

Crazy Old Man Beloved by Gays

Contempt of Dance

They Have the Google on Computers Now

Coordinate Purchasing for Fun and Profit

Senate Filled With Human Shit

Cartoon Violence Seems To Have Missed The Memo

I'm From Buenos Aires, and I Say Kill 'Em All!

Record Profits & Record Abortions!

Ted?

You Can't Figure Out the Bag I'm In

HAMAZ IZ IN UR GAZA, FONIN' UR DIPLOMATZ

Wonkette Sponsors Are Surging Their Little Hearts Out

Arnold to Solve Looming Maria Problem

Fox Mourns Death of Family Stone Bassist's Wife

The Surge is Done!

T&A

Peggy Noonan Is Breaking Up With George W. Bush

Drop Yourself On the Situation, Dude

Popeye, Swee'Pea Wanted For Questioning

Danny DeVito's Just Feeling Left Out These Days

Mike Gravel Will Kill Again

Dirty Sides

Bush More Popular Than Congress

Hot Leads

Fox Mulder Named Interim FBI Director

Your Daddy's Rich and Your Momma's Good Looking

Scooter's Hoosegow Bound

They've Hijacked a Train

Nazi Scumbag Finally Dies

DoJ Protecting Your Right to Love God, Hate Gays

The Dirty Harry Retirement Plan

Rudy Giuliani Is In Trouble

Evil Canadians Behind 'Ron Paul Fever'

Dem Candidates To Debate Funny Cat Video

Rock Out, Shuffle Your Feet, or Nod Appreciatively

Tommy Thompson Reminds America That He Is Running For President

Toe the Line

El Aborto

Harriet Miers to Return to Prime Time

Bitches Back

Joe Biden Shocker: Maybe He's Not Expecting To Win!

Bush Starts War He Can Maybe Win, Against Little Owls

Evil White House Plot Will Get All Hill Staffers Fired

Sodomy With a Nine Iron

McCain Upgrade Full of Malware, Incompatible With Most Users' Systems

Actorvision

I'll Recruit My Army From the Orphanages

Dick Cheney To Help Fred Thompson Pick Running Mate

ODCP Promises to Get Back to You in the Far Future, If Man is Still Alive

New Study Proves You're Already Tired of This Crap

Huckabee Guilty of Sartorial War Crimes

Mass Transit

When Rudy's Prez, All of America Will Be Ground Zero!

Who Wants to be a Senator?

When Jesus Lands In Missouri, He Will Kick Romney's Blasphemous Ass

Come On Down, Sweet Virginia

Specialize in Something

Ron Paul Fever Sweeping Portion of Nation That Fucks Around on the Internet

Having a Ball

Sellout Shocker: Hillary 'Gave Her Face' To GOP Makeup Queen

Albanians Steal Bush's Wristwatch -- THIS MEANS WAR!

Activist Judges Grant Hypothetical Terrorist Constitutional Right to Kill Us All

Still No Bedtime for Gonzo

Wimminz

Apple iPhone Shocker: Liberal Media Hides Within!

Military Gay Bomb Project Even Less Successful Than Controversial 'Soy Bomb'

Stool Sample

Kissinger's Forest Club Worships '70s Bikini Poster

Colombians Heart Clintons

Post-Industrial America

Foul-Mouthed Bush & Cheney Liberate America's Wealthy Fucktards

Bulgaria Greets Great Satan With Upside-Down U.S. Flags

Nothing Else In the World Smells Like That ...

John Derbyshire's Not Buying Liberal Slavery Propaganda

Making Bank

Symbolic Resolution to Face Symbolic End

Great Satan Visits Bulgaria

Obama Responsible For Rich Douches Dressing Even Douchier

Repetition of History Moves Beyond 'Farce' to 'Sitcom'

It's a Regular Crapshoot

So Strike Me Once Again, I've Got Nothing To Lose

No Confidence Monday!

SCREAMING SCOOTER LIBBY SENT BACK TO JAIL

Bag Boys, Ball Boys

Washington Needs Mike Huckabee's Son

Out, About

Senator Speaks on Behalf of Immigration Reform, Dances With Gene Kelly

Jefferson Pleads Rich to Charges of Bribery

Make Your Own Virginia Customized LOL PLATEZ!!!1!

Cartoon Violence: Unrelenting Horror Edition

America's Sexiest Ambassadors

Where's Your Mayor Now?

Ashtray Floors, Dirty Clothes & Filthy Jokes

Those Who Forget the Past Are Condemned To Bush Vomiting On Them

Wonkette Sponsors Want to Spread the News About Ron Paul

McCain's Wife Surely Next to Endorse Fred Thompson

In Closed Meeting, Putin Surprises Bush With Missile Plan, Polonium-Laced Jujube

Kucinich v. Kucinich

Ron Paul's 777 Fans Will Uncover the Truth

Rest Easy, America: Osama bin Ladens All Found!

Oh, Hey There, Just Ignore Whatever's On John Edwards' Official Website

The Queen Takes Her Tea With 72 Virgins

Work For the Catholics or the Godless, Either One's Cool By Us

Middle-Aged Liberal Ladies Crash Hillary's 'Youth Party'

Beware the Bloggers' Bile

Art Trafficking

There Goes Old Georgetown

Edwards Campaign Blog: Bill Richardson Feeds Babies To Wolves

Wonkette's Official Comment on the Ongoing Senate Immigration Bill Debate

Cruel Shoes

War Czar Hearings Going Much More Smoothly Than Wars

Senate Makes it Official: The Internet is Scary!

Clemency-Worthy

Dead Baby Jokes

Oh Garbage Dump Why Are You Called a Garbage Dump?

Putin, What a Joker

Dear Walnuts: Stop Saying 'My Friends'

National Journal Would Like You Ron Paul Fanatics To Knock It Off

WALNUTS' Book Club

Lou Dobbs, Caucus-Blocker

Ron Paul Will Be President of Second Life, MySpace & World of Warcraft

Beyonce & Giuliani Will Be Your Party Dolls

You'll Want Drugs For Any of These, Really

America Wants Alan Keyes For President!

It's So Cold in Alaska

GOP to Push for Anti-Flag-Eating Amendment

Put Him On the Lecture Circuit

Lovely Lady Stumps

Nation: 'I'm With the Scary Old Man'

Republicans Promise to Keep Bush Active in His Retirement Years

Come se dice, "Get the Mexicans out"?

John McCain Would Like You To Know He Won the Debate

Who Won the Debate? YOU DECIDE 2007 DO IT NOW!

Bonus Round & Seating Switcheroo: More GOP Debate Liveblogging!

Lightning Round! Liveblogging the Jabbering Old Nuts

Shut Up, Old Man: Liveblogging the 97th GOP Debate

Debate Liveblogging: The 27th GOP Debate

Wonkette to Cosponsor Best Debate Ever

Hot GOP Debate Action Starting Around 7 P.M. Eastern

30 Months Without Nachos

Rudy's Campaign Sorta Sorry About That Mormon Horseman Thing

Mike Bloomberg Would Like You Idiots To Get Over Yourselves

BOB NOVAK'S IN UR JURIEZ, CONVICTIN' UR PEEPS

Love and Lectures

Obama & Walnuts Promise New Wave of Terrible U.S. Riots

Like Jesus, Gridskipper Is Born Again

We Hate Your Job, Take One of These

Draft Everyone

Wyoming, Meet Your New Senator ... Lynne Cheney!

Liberal Media Totally Hates Al Gore

Dolly and the Rat Trap

30 Months for Scooter!

Children by the Millions Sing for Scooter Libby

Shocker: Spokesman for Anti-Immigration Group Secretly White

Scooter to be Sent Up Today

What's Three Fifths of 12 Million?

Bush Jets to Europe to Plan Cold War: First Blood Part II

Fred Thompson's Administration Will Continue Proud Bush-Cheney Legacy

Birthdays In the News, Progress On the March

HBO's 'Flight of the Conchords' Screening Party

Mexicans Are Murder

Senators and Representatives: They're Just Like You Caligula

Nation Shocked at Jefferson Indictment

Greenland Cute When Overexcited

Somebody Get L. Ron Romney a Prop Horse!

Fear Will Keep the Local Systems In Line ...

Gays & Elizabeth Edwards All Snakin' On John Edwards

Susan Estrich Outraged by Obama's Reggaeton

Our Proudest Moment

The Democrats Will Kill You to Get UBL

Democratic Debate Has Bright Point

Cock Fight

Attention Whore Deficit Disorder

War With Iran Will Provide Fun Distraction From the Summer Heat

Forked Tongues

The Condi Rice Method of Statesmanship

Al Gore Will Have His Revenge On Florida

Panda, With a Vengeance

The Lighter Side of Washington ...

Apes, Geurrillas

Rudy Giuliani's a Nasty Little Troll

The Camera Takes Off Fifty Pounds

Spooks, Hacks, Chicks

Christopher Hitchens Is Successfully Wrong

Cartoon Violence Has Got More Chins Than A Chinese Phone Book

Everybody Forgot About Wesley Clark

Wonkette Sponsors Have Had Enuf

Paul Wolfowitz Is Having a Bad Day

Single Resignation Decimates Press Corps' Source Pool

Ain't No Cure

Hillary Promises Nu Jerbz 4 Tommorrow

Old Friends Talk About How Much Dubya Sucks

Colorado Senator Caught Biting Conrad Burns' Rhymes

Scooter Libby's Lawyers Kindly Suggest He Should Not Go To Prison

RNC Deletes Everyone's Number From Their Phone

Lady Who Fucked Up Iraq to Fix It

Never Get Involved In a Land War In Cabo

CIA Sued for Being a Dick

ENUF IZ ENUF! Freaks Protest National Spelling Bee

Will It Be Dinosaur? Will It Be Pirate Ship?

Jenna and Barbara Teach Elmo a Smoking Game and a Drinking Game

Lotta Programs Out There Need Some Assistance

Scalia's Daughter Gets DUI, Fails To Kill Her Children

Cartoon Lite-Brites Shut Down Washington

Marine Corps Wants America's Favorite Marine To Shut Up!

The Suprasternal Notch, In Case You're Interested

Bored Scandinavian Bamas

Wonkette Subcommittee on Comments to Hold Hearings on LOLs

The Perfect Gift For Samuel David Cheney

Boston Still Fighting War on Hilarious Cartoon Terror

Bush Promises to Lose Iraq War, Still Occupy Country For 50 Years

A Small Town in Maine

Like It

Chris Lehmann's Review of Carl Bernstein's Book About Hillary Clinton, Summarized

When, Not If

More Ethanol Than We Can Ever Possibly Drink

RUDY MYSPACE SHOCKER: IS THIS HIS NEW GAL PAL?

More Sick Insurgent Videos

'We Can Quit You,' Dubya Loyalists Cry Out

Jane Fonda Did Movies, Once

At Least We Don't Wear Togas, For Now

Razzle Dazzle

Meant to be Spent Alone

Fred Who?

Cheney's Tomb of the Unknown Lobbyist

Lieberman Elected King of Iraq

Drunken Idiot Crook Nevada Guv Now Popular As Bush!

Secret Interrogation Techniques to be Replaced With Other Secret Interrogation Techniques

Rejoice, Republicans: Divorced Hollywood Actor Will Be Your Nominee!

Ingrate Immigrates

The Masturbatory Fantasies of the Rich and Famous

Viva La Pantyhose

Bob Zoellick's Girlfriend to Get Raise

Bush Securing Our Fake Borders

DC Needs a Slogan

America Falls On Its Ass, Mexico Laughs

Survivors of Super Virus Will Dream of Elderly Black Woman

New Nut To Join Comical Race For GOP Nomination

But, But, Rudy Did Stand Around Looking Serious!

Fred Thompson Has Complete Control of Every GOP Primary Voter

Dance Dance Revolution

Long Boring 'Viral Video' Worth Watching For a Few Seconds

Weekend at Nancy's

The Surge Worked: Cindy Sheehan Gives Up and Goes Back to Russia

Andrew Card, Beloved by College Students Everywhere

Buy One, Get One Free or Die

Can't Always Get

Ain't Nobody Here But Us Chickens

Answers From Above

Nuts May Contain Nuts

Reagan Diary: 'Let's Bust Rev. Moon Out of Prison For New Year's!'

Long-Winded Weekend

Memorial Day Photo Fun: Prescott Bush Runs the World

You've Been Ravaging Global Stability In My Mind All Day

Hero Congressman Saves Own Wallet

JFK's Killers Still Loose But Mostly Dead

Cartoon Violence: Wall-To-Wall Worldwide Wolfucking Edition

Wonkette Sponsors Will Never Resign

Birds Now Attacking Everyone

Proofreading the Senate Immigration Debate

STUNNING REVELATIONS IN TWO NEW CLINTON BIOS

Moral Day

Various Kinds of Holes

God Rains Shit Upon George W. Bush

Making Dead Bodies Over Your Dead Body

Schumer Positive That Everyone Agrees With Him

Female Airman Punished For Kinky Three-Way Refueling Stunts

Roger Simon: Only Red-Blooded Gentiles Can Buy Our Presidency

Ooh, Ooh, Take the Confidential One

Minutemen Founder Corrupt, Dreams of Hundreds of Racists Shattered

LOL PREZ HAS A FLAVOR!!!1!

HE "FLAKED," GET IT? GET IT?

The Hill Hates Our Troops

Logrolling In Our Time

Meet the Baltimore Examiner's Psychopath Editor!

Washington Post Owner Flees DC For Manhattan

BREAKING: DRIVERS STILL TAKING ROADS

Alberto & Monica: A Love Story

NYT Now Boring You Interactively

Little Rat

Tricks, Dicks

You Are Not a Microwave

The Minnesota Legislature: Still the Nation's Booziest

Monica Goodling Brings Down the House

Columnist Comes Up With Flimsy Excuse to Mention John Edwards and Booty in Same Headline

It's a Miracle! Lesbian Cheney Daughter Gives Birth

Cheney Totally On DC Madam's Phone List

Julio Removed From Schoolyard, Sent Back to Mexico

Grant's Tomb

Bush Laughs At Your Stupid Seatbelt Laws

Dear Walnuts, DO NOT WANT

Even Snorg Girls Get the Blues

Ted Kennedy Cares About the Chicken Pluckers

Hirshhorn After Hours 2

John Derbyshire Discovers a Quadroon In Our Midst

Paul and Shaha: The Break-Up

Hank Paulson Already a Failure

Mike Capuano: 'The People Elected Me to be Unethical'

Ripe Pair

Your Job's Your Credit

Presenting the Nation's Best Political Cartoon Ever!

Iraqi Public TV Much, Much More Entertaining

Iraqi Officials Blame Bombing on Mysterious "G-Unit"

Religious Fanatic Plans Terrorist Attack at Falwell's Funeral

Congressman Sneaks Pork Chop, Doesn't Starve To Death

A Good, Abundant Life

LOL, Bush & Walnuts!

Falwell Hatin' On Dubya From Beyond the Grave

Our Steeple and Thomas Edison's Dick

Music, Books, Murder

Pentagon Declares War On Capitol Hill

An Amendment to Be

Florida Actress Lands New Role!

Gas Prices & Entire Country Hit 1981 Levels

Jimmy Carter is Mean

Reagan Diaries Sadly Not a Hoax

Immibation

Red Rockets

Nagourney: Primary Campaign to Go On Forever and Ever and Ever

The Cops Don't Need You & Man, They Expect the Same

What the Main Stream Media Won't Tell You

McCain Apparently Trying Out to Write for Us

Introducing Jezebel

Monday is Dead Day

Dr. Laura's Cretin Son Having Fun Torturing People In Afghanistan

Fuck You Friday

Hillary Presidency To Be Madcap Gender-Bending Comedy

Meet Dennis Kucinich's Hot Young Wife!

Highway Safety Experts Warn of All-Election Radio Station

Iraq Failure Apparently Britain's Fault

Liberal Literacy & Typing Bias Blamed For GOP Internet Failure

Bill Richardson: Did You Know That He is Mexican?

They Didn't Save Lincoln's Brain

Zero Amigos

Sha-Ha-Ha

Updates on Our Top Stories

James, James, Chris, Newt, and Don

Friday Night News Dump: Alberto Out At 5?

Shaha's Just Pissed Because You Didn't Run Her Press Release

BILL CLINTON TASERED TO DEATH

Borf You

Would U Listen 2 Me Then?

'The Onion' DC Reception

Not Quite the DC Madam ...

Getting It Right For a Change

Learn To Destroy Planets From Don Rumsfeld Himself!

Cartoon Violence Sweats The Small Stuff

Bush 41, Rev. Moon Almost Tragically Burned To Death

Shocker: Wolfucker Bitchy, Entitled

Wonkette Sponsors Will Not Resign Under a Cloud

Gonzo to Not Care About No Confidence Vote

Wolfowitz Has Greatness, Resignation Thrust Upon Him

Finish Him

Chocolate City

WOLFIE RESIGNED HEY EVERYONE

Coulter Confirms: Falwell with Reagan in Hell

Does It Make You Porny?

Beloved Right-Wing Message Board Demands Bush Impeachment

Rudy & Barry Both Hate Your Pets

Being a Blogger is So Much Fun, We Think You Should Do it Too

Lonely Shut-ins Wish the Wash 'Times' a Very Happy Birthday

Things That May or May Not be Funny

Senate Soooo Mad at Gonzo

Any Day Now

Ghost Town Votes For Bush Impeachment

Duncan Hunter: A Wealthy Version of the Common Man

NYT: Massachusetts is Full of Whores

Critics Urge Wolfowitz to Resign and Spend More Time on his Lawn

Forced Resignations for All

Falwell Ruined 'Democracy, Culture & Civilization'

Milk It

Blair, Bush to Exchange French Kissing Anecdotes, Tips

Help Hillary Pick a Crappy Campaign Song!

URGENT WOLFOWITZ NEWS

Breaking: Bush Appointee May Have Been Unqualified

Get Along Home, Cindy, Cindy

Happy 19th 26th Year of the Bush-Clinton Era!

Duncan Hunter PWNED by Chuck Hagel

It's So Cold in Alaska

Quid Pro Quo

Ron Paul Also Has Refreshing Views About All Blacks Being Criminals

Press Club Battle of the Bands

Iraq Shocker: Iraq Not Quite Safe Enough For British Royalty

Tweezerman '08

Nut vs Nut

Paul Wolfowitz Won't Resign When It's Overcast

Ashcroft Takes Heroic Stand, Seventh Seal Apparently Broken Three Years Ago

Plot of Upcoming 'Die Hard' Sequel Spoiled by GOP Debate

Pale Horse's Ass

Pour One Out for Jerry: More GOP Liveblogging

Triumph of the Willies: GOP Liveblogging Super Fun!

One Reason To Like Paul Wolfowitz

GOP Debate Live-Blogging Alert!

Oh, Wikipedia, You Are So Funny

Does Your Crapper Stack Up?

Supreme Size Pepsi Please, No Pubic Hair

Barney Frank: Yeah I Hurt Myself, Now Fuck Off

All Evil Old White Dudes Look Alike

John Kerry Addicted To Dumb Blackberry Game

Mitt Romney: 'Good-bye My Friend Who Worshiped Same Jesus As Me'

Breaking: Being Poor is Hard

Tonight: A Very Special GOP Tribute To Jerry Falwell

PRAISE GOD, JERRY FALWELL IS DEAD

God Angrily Awaiting Jerry Falwell's Arrival

OMG OMG WOLFOWITZ UNETHICAL!

GOP Hopefuls Hope You Don't Remember Their Old Positions on Immigration

Live Without 'Em

Another Guy Who Isn't Gonzo Quit

McCain Finally Finds Somebody Older Than Him

Someone's Got a Case of the Bundays

Newsweek Shares Intimate Knowledge With U.S. Readers

Newt, Improved

Blow Me, Baby

This Is Important: Space Monsters No Smarter Than Bush

Clinton Campaign Provides Handy Way to Bug the Hell Out of Your Friends

Bush Hopes Magic Iraqi Spells Will Bewitch Americans

US Neutralizes Hilariously Named Menace to Freedom

As Goes Katie Couric, So Goes Iraq

Bullshitting Beats Workin': The Tony Snow Edition

Chelsea Clinton's So Smart & Boring

Baby Bubba's Got a Gun

Yankees to Sign Jefferson for $28 Million

MILF Alleges Corruption in Philippine Election

US-Russia Relations More of a 'Chilly Argument,' Rice Insists

Baltimore Football Fans Cheer Total Destruction of Indianapolis

Bad Mothers

And Baghdad Does Whatever She Please

The Funk of 40,000 Years

Let's All Buy Dick Cheney An iPod!

Cheney Sends Message to Iran: We Will Say Mean Things About You on Boats

No Wonder Kids Heart Ron Paul

Checking In With Drunken Crook Jim Gibbons

CNN International Has Some Good News!

Condi Just Called to Say She Loves Paul

Now It's Getting Good: Ferrets Attack Rudy

Hilarious 'Mini Cheney' Entertains Troops In Iraq

Get Your Ladles, Girls, Soup's On

Like Every Weekend, You Can Hang With Ian and Bob

Bagels, Donuts and Schmears

Cartoon Violence Killed The Radio Star

Nerd Hero Ron Paul Rockin' da Interwebz

Wonkette Sponsors Both Oppose and Support Benchmarks

Cheney Now Dumping His Victims In Washington State

Hillary's Only Hope: Reverse Time, Or Become Black

Romney Just Unexciting Enough to Get Excited About

Triumph of the Will: Death Star III

We Never Want to Hear the Word 'Benchmark' Again

Fun with Funding

Giuliani Hates American Farmers Who Love Him

Obama Campaign Censors Painting of America's Sweetheart

Gonzo Rides Again

Bronx Bribers

$65 Million Pants

Lou Dobbs' Job Being Outsourced To India

Congress Announces Best Place To See Boobies On The Hill Today

North Dakota Senator Unhealthily Obsessed With Prairie Dogs

Just Don't Mention Cambodia

Pump Play

Tommy Thompson: 'I'm Deaf, So I'm Not Listening To Your Questions'

Cheerio, Chum: Tony Blair Finally Quits

Cute Moderate Republicans Pretend the President Cares What They Think

The Wolfucker Demands Your Respect

Nobody Move

Cheney's Vacation Scrapbook

Give a Kid Some Beer & Maybe It'll Shut Up

'Guilt For History Hypothalamus' Is The Largest Erogenous Zone

Newsmedia Toys With Old Man For Yuks

It's Not Gay, It's European

BREAKING: Potentially Exciting Story Actually Kind of Bland

Wait, What? Bill Richardson's Comedy Campaign Commercials

Evil Takes Time

Racist Bush Nominee: Whites Also Hate Robots

'Thumping' Not Enough of a Double Entendre for Rahm Emanuel

Fascist Gay Abortionist Also a Furry

News Alert: Cheney Is Not At That One Place In Baghdad

Oh Hey, Cheney's Maybe On the DC Madam's List

Dave Obey Makes Dennis Kucinich Cry

Lou Dobbs: 'I Won't Let Jesus Protect Those Mexicans'

Today's Bigot: Al Sharpton

Rudy Giuliani's Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

Cheney Stops by Baghdad Just to Make Threatening 'Throat-Slitting' Gesture to Maliki

Everybody Hates Their Boss

High On Life

Drughead Fuckin Loser '08

McCain Continues Shedding Staff, Will Soon Name 'Straight Talk Express' Bus Driver Fundraising Director

Ben Franklin Would Be Proud

Popular Rat Urges Destruction of Israel

Al Gore Identity-Theft E-Mail Shocker!

Hill Staffer Unwilling to Live Out Hilarious Multi-Racial Buddy Movie At Home

Everybody Hates All Declared Candidates

All of Don Imus' Problems Solved

Rejoice, White America: There Is a Candidate Just For You!

Hating Freedom, Wearing Pasties

Congressman Bravely Warns of Negro Menace

Mitt Romney Supports French Marriage To Space Monsters

Wizard People

John Doolittle Has 99 Problems

'Politico': Rudy Still a Baby-Killer

Feds Nix Dix Six

Morning Cheerios

Under the Yellow Lemonade Flag

Symbol of All That is Wrong With Minnesota Makes Perfect Gubernatorial Candidate

Laugh It Off

'Brightest Young Things' Relaunch Party

The Onion Launch Party

DC Traffic Finally Solved!

Mitt Romney Doesn't Care For Mr. Spock's Love Life

BREAKING: LOU DOBBS BECOMES A MEXICAN

Get Your Head in the Game

BREAKING: WOLFOWITZ QUITS (?) ... WORLD (BANK) SAVED

Hey Everybody, Bill Clinton Wrote Sunday's NYT Crossword Clues!

Date to Church

CNN's Political Bias Revealed

Jim Gibbons' Assault Victims Now Packing Bombs

LOL, Biden Pwned By His Many Terrible Faults

World Bank Still Hasn't Buried Paul

Old English Lady Visits America

Shaming

IT'S MY DESTINY

Say Good-Bye To Intern Lauren

John Bolton Loves the Whole Axis of Evil

Schindler's Lust

Let the Treasury Department Assist You in All Your Drug-Running Endeavors

When Whores Collide

Let's Keep It Interesting

Pull the Plug

Mexi-Hater Tancredo Also a Goddamned Liar

Bad News For Rudy: Nobody Even Believes 9/11 Anymore

Dana Perino's Husband Thrown In Jail!

In DC, Only Fat Gay Hookers Read Holy Bible

Cartoon Violence's Slow Descent Into Madness

Too Old & Sad To Be Wonkette's Intern? Maybe Try a Real Job!

Wonkette Sponsors Would Be OK With That

Florida Still Ruining Democracy For the Rest of Us

The Republican Debate Clip Show

All The Beauty They Possess Inside

Liveblogging the Old Crazies: Reagan's Flipping In His Grave

Great Reagan's Ghost! Liveblogging the GOP Debate

Live From Simi Valley, California, It's Liveblogging the GOP Debate!

Bush Still Living In Magical World of Multiple 'Internets'

The Kids Are Alright (Not Really)

It Just Became Marginally Harder For Lepers to Get Obama to Cure Them With His Touch

Pissy, Pissy, and Prankalot

DEEP

Actually, Here's a Pretty Great Debate Drinking Game!

Sir Elton John and a Saber Toothed Tiger

Call Now To Impeach!

Here Comes Veto Number 3, Homosexuals!

Cold Cold Ground

Even Think Tank People Play Debate Drinking Games

Kindergarten Class Wins TIME Cover Contest

Desperate Americans Beg Queen 'Please Take Us Back!'

Barry Hussein Obama Getting Some On the Side?

How to Not Look as Bad a John McCain Tonight

DC Madam's List Slightly Less Exciting Than a Capital File Party

Trick Ass Bench, Mark Ass Buster

Nice Ass

Gere Up

Ron Paul Has a Lot of Free Time

Marion Barry's Delightful New Crack-Money Scheme Revealed

NASA Now Crashing Trains, Too

'Note' In Dire Need of Re-coding

Sunset Rubdown

Mormon Scientologist Hates the Troops!

Hilarious Mix-Up Results In Churchill Award For Rumsfeld

Representative Plugger

Could Be Worse, You Could Be Kitty

Obama NOT a Cool New Person After All

HELP WANTED: MORE SUPPLE INTERN FLESH

World Bank Takes Rest of Month Off to Argue With Paul Wolfowitz

Cabinet Demands Resignation Over Stupid, Failed War

Traitorous Hippie Barred from Mocking Wounded Heroes

Karl Rove's Wacky College Pranks Set the Stage For His Wacky Adulthood Betrayal of the American Dream

Have Your War And Veto It Too

Dare To Grasp

Happy Mission Accomplished Day! Oh, and Bush Vetoed the Iraq Thing ...

Yearbook Photo Reveals Terrible Tenet Secret

They've Gone To Plaid

Crazy Woman Vows to Return to Congress

To Do: Regent University Student Film Festival

Christopher Hitchens Tragically Unaffected by Writer's Block

Let Us Entertain You

Two Wheels Good

Walnuts Proposes International Team of Superheroes Will End Iraq War

Nancy Reagan Clearly Dressed Her Husband

Happy Loyalty Day, Fascists!

Hey Mexicans, Leave Your Dope At Home, In Mexico!

Happy May Day, Commies!

Hang In There, Wolfie!

DC Party, Hollywood Style!

Mission Accomplished 2: The Empire Strikes Back

Metro Section: Montgomery Burns

TTFN, Wonketteers!

The Note: Not Dead, Just Irrelevant

Why Washington DC May Have to Go Without Representation After All

Art Night: Paintings, Sculptures, Video Installations, and Bloody Severed Cocks

Washington Post Makes Avoiding Politicians Easier Than Ever

Scandal Rocks DC Restaurant World: Hooters Not That Good

Deborah Jeane Palfrey Explains It All For You

What's On Fire Today in DC

To Do: Man Date

Hillary To Selectively Demonstrate Shame of Her Upbringing

Les Yeux Sans Visage

Today Is Tax Freedom Day!

Fringe Candidates Cement Their Fringeness by Making Desperate, Poorly Thought Out Appeals

Paul Begs Bank for Moral Debt Forgiveness

Randall Tobias' History of Infelicities Hinted At

Atlantans Harness Medieval Technology to Promote Literacy, Cheney Presidency

Ha Ha! Michelle Bachmann's Leg Hurts!

Everyone's Still Doing It With Whores, Apparently

The Note is Dead

Illin' Like A Villian

Sanctuary

Rumors on the Internets: Oh, Put A Sock In It!

Rick Won't Go

Hillary Tries To Explain Away Her Tendency to Accentuate Her Pandering

Walnuts McCain's All Hatin' on New Hampshire Civil Unions

Metro Section: Dangerous Lesions

Take A Baathist Together

Well Played, Dennis Kucinich!

John Edwards to War on Terror: "NAA NAA NAA NAA!! I DON'T SEE YOU!"

Watching The Debate With Pro-Choice America

Window Dressing

What? You Want The Wolfowitz Discourse Elevated? DONE.

Mike Gravel Wants the Military to be "Colorful, Intermingled" and Ready to Die a Hot, Throbbing Death

OMGs, Chris Dodd, Thanks for the Add!

Cartoon Violence Don't Preach

Frynds With Benefits

How Does a NeoCon Vampire Get a Job at the World Bank, Anyway?

FBI Training: NSFW, NSF Anybody.

Interweb Dorks Critique Our Liveblogging Skills

Wonkette Sponsors Are Modestly Self-critical

Dem Defeat Bill Scheduled to be Defeated on Anniversary of our Success

Meet Your Guest Editor

George Tenet's Book Absolves George Tenet

It's the Thought That Counts

Anti-Gonzales Hero Marine Arrested On Hill!

Barack Obama, Man of 1,000 Voices

BREAKING: OBAMA ADOPTS ABSURD SONG OF THE SOUTH ACCENT

MORE "LIVE" "BLOGGING"

Liveblogging the First Democratic Debate Until the Liquor Runs Out

Mike Huckabee's Son Tries To Finish What Jim Webb Started

Rumors On The Internets: Love The Iraq War As Thyself

Porn-Loving Military Hero Charged With "Aiding the Enemy"

Metro Section: Christina Ricci is the Opposite of Sex

Islamic Nazis Also Really Shitty Rat-Ballers

Bob Franken Just Doesn't Give a Shit Anymore

Cartoon Unabomber To Join Andrew Sullivan In Holy Blogimony!

Barry Hussein O'Bomber Terrorist Outrage!

To Do: The Parallax View

MLB Creating Space-Time Portal To Defeat U.S. Cuban Embargo

Gossip Roundup: One Term in Paris

Federal Government Announces End of the World In 2012

National Park Service Loves Psychotic Backyard Porn

McCain Logo Stolen, Photoshopped With "Rule With Iron Fist" Filter

Tony Snow Uses Up All His Sick Days, Employers Force Him to Return to Briefing Room

Andrew Sullivan to Marry Guy With Name That's Hard to Hear Correctly While Drunk

Daily Briefing: All Ye Who Enter

Rumors On The Internets: Overstand Your Place

McCain Relaunches Campaign by Opening Fire on White House, Killing Dozens

Metro Section: Experience

GWB Does the Retard-Zombie Dance Like the Retard-Zombie He Is

To Do: British Drunks on British Drunks

Gossip Roundup: Boffo BO for Gonzo

Like They'd Hire Wonkette Readers For Anything

Ask a Lobbyist: God is a Concept by Which We Measure Our Contributions

Congress Subpoenas Condi Over IRAQ WAR

Hot Bear-On-GILF Alaskan Action!

Malkin's Site Now Requires Adult ID Check

U.S. Troops In Iraq Can't Defeat BOB

Drunken Burrito-Pants Captain America Jailed In Florida

Rudy's Threat: Vote For Me Or I'll Blow Up More Buildings

Jimmie Walker Has Low Standards

Entire McCain Campaign Up to This Point An Elaborate Hoax

Daily Briefing: So Stupid That

Metro Section: WND, SPM

Rumors On The Internets: Your Bad

Cheney Feeling Fine, Kucinich To Impeach In 10 Minutes

McCain Campaign Gives Up on Hipsters, Punkers

American Mud-Hut Dwellers Hit Hard By Housing Crisis

To Do: Freedom's Power

Gossip Roundup: Make It Stop

China To DC: 'Keep the Worn-Out Panda; We've Got Cute Baby Ones'

Dingbats Will Bravely Stalk Day-Care Centers

URGENT BREAKING UNCONFIRMED REPORT FROM THE HILL

The Following Congressmen Will All Be in Jail By the End of the Term

Wussy Kucinich Delays Cheney Impeachment Again

Beloved Anti-Gonzales Marine Reveals All!

High School Goths Win Lawsuit

Gonzales and Wolfowitz to Reign Forever

Daily Briefing: Spite

Rumors On The Internets: Best Drunk Stories Ever

George W. Bush Is a Wounded Iraq War Veteran... In His Soul

John Kerry Abandons Book Tour, Joins Cult

Shaha Ali Riza Isn't Paul Wolfowitz's 'Special Lady', She's His Fuckin' Lady Friend, Man

Hopefully the Last White House Correspondents' Dinner Post

Laurie David: Making Karl Rove Look Good Since 2007

North Dakota Opts Out of Future Dystopia

To Do: Get Low

WHCD Roundup: You Didn't Have to Be There

Nancy Pelosi: Racist, Sexist Monster

WHCD Reception Photos Are Here! Wake the Kids!

'Times' Criticizes Fucking and Drugs Administration

Crazy People Make Stand Against Crazy Person

BREAKING: Rich Little Not Funny 23 Years Ago

Daily Briefing: Ought to Pasture

Rudy's Plunger Rape Pics Now Password Protected

Rich Little Died For Our Sins

Wonkette's Week in Review: March of The Penguins

Rumors On The Internets: Bob Marley Used To Live In Delaware

Metro Section: 420

WHCD: We'll Be There So You Don't Have To

World Bank Board 'Very Concerned,' Glad No One's Paying Attention Anymore

NRA Takes Aim at Sea Monsters, Jews

Wonk'd: Ruts Are Deeper Than Graves

Gossip Roundup: Old Person Retires

Bob Barr Officially Better Than Ann Coulter

Cartoon Violence Geniet Van Lerend Over Andere Culturen

President McCain Begs Nation to Laugh at His Jokes

To Do: In Case You Can't Get Into Hitch's House

We All Grieve in our Own Ways

Controversial Imus to be Replaced With Uncontroversial Republican Skinhead

As Vote for New President Nears, Democracy Disappoints Americans

If You Are a Republican Congressman, the FBI Would Like a Word With You

Are You There, God? It's Me, Some Asshole.

Nation Unsubscribes from ParkRidge47's YouTube Feed

Wonkette Sponsors Are Openly Hipsters

Chuck Hagel to Open Small Chain of Shoe Stores With Ned Lamont

McCain to Launch Presidential Campaign, Give You Diarrhea

Daily Briefing: Sore

Ken Layne Rips Off Latex Mask, Reveals 25-Year Old Libertarian

Marine Hero of the Day

America's Favorite Shitty Singer to Attend WHCA Dinner

Happy American Terrorists Attacked the Military Day!

Rumors On The Internets: Viva La Manassas

Metro Section: Make it Work

To Do: David Cross!

Gossip Roundup: Admirable

Bush Shuts Up, Makes News In Dayton

When All Else Fails, Hire a Wonkette Reader!

Brief Hope For DC Democracy To Be Vetoed By Bush

Senate Told It's Time To Reinstate Military Draft

The Senile-Dementia Comedic Stylings of WALNUTS!

CNN Maybe Doesn't Really Believe Gonzo's Lies

Sing Along With Walnuts!

Happy Birthday To America's Greatest Newspaper!

Sexy Portraits of Grief

Asshole General Takes the Stand

Daily Briefing: Retry, Fail?

Metro Section: Wine, Beef, Cops & Cannons

Doolittle Raid Causes Journalists to Fall Into Hole in Time-Space Continuum

Rumors On The Internets: Pain Is Hilarious

Wonkette Benefit Crash: Russian Orphan Benefit

To Do: Let's Get Retarded

Gossip Roundup: Don't Choke

Let's Intentionally Destroy the 2008 Election!

'I Met Wolf Blitzer At the Big Massacre!'

Ask a Lobbyist: Define 'Fraud'

Toddlers Bravely Protect 2nd Amendment Freedoms

SCOTUS Declares Your Uterus Unconstitutional

Evil Korean Also Democrat, Communist, Terrorist

Barry Hussein Obama Also Joining Mexican Terrorists

CIRCULAMITY IN G'TOWN

160 Killed In Terrible Massacre

MySpace Stretches Definitions of "Cool," "New"

BlackBerrys Silenced, Washington in a Panic

Daily Briefing: Smaller Tragedies

Rumors On The Internets: Cow, Tao

Metro Section: Urban Horizons

John Derbyshire: Last Action Hero

John Edwards Twice as Gay as Bill Clinton

To Do: Double Ended

Wonkette Party Crash: Fashion for Paws

Secret Service Agents Shoot Each Other At White House

'Well, I Was Gonna Impeach Cheney ...'

It's Time For America To Heal

Gossip Roundup: Hulk Legislate

Opportunists of the Day

60,000 Guys Standing Around Uncomfortably

Political World To Take Rest of Week Off

Jenna's Book About Country Her Grandfather Destroyed

Bloggers Finally Affect Democracy

Barry Hussein Obama Also Pro-Sodomy!

The SURGE Is Working!

Cheney Transported Inside Aluminum Casket

Dusty Foggo Returns

John McCain's Secret Plan to End the War

Daily Briefing: Weapons of Mass Destruction

Rumors On The Internets: Assonance

2008: Year of the Kucinich Revolution

Sour Grapes From Award-Losing AP Copy Ed

DC Emancipation Day: Not Even Trying

Stop Bugging Craig Crawford About Don Imus

Metro Section: Ooga Booga

Tommy Thompson: 'Nothing Wrong With Money-Loving Jews!'

The Most DY-NO-MITE Picture Even Taken

31% of Americans Have No Idea Who's Running the Country

Oh Hey, Is There Some Sort of Party Going on This Weekend?

To Do: That Special Combination of Grace, Wit and Style

Obama's the New Jesus!

David Brooks Swears Very, Very Quietly

Jesus-Loving U.S. Attorney Also Loves Examining Her Flaws

Gossip Roundup: Softball Torture

2008: The Campaign Without Teenagers

Happy Emancipation Day!

Bitter Careerist Theater Continues

Crusty Old General Refuses to Help Win War

Wolfowitz Meltdown to Provide Another Week of Entertainment

Daily Briefing: Resignation Week

Wonkette's Week in Review: News and Jokes

Rumors On The Internets: Karl's Password is 1-2-3-4-5

Metro Section: Appropriately Grim

Andrew Sullivan Shocker: 'South Park' Actually a Cartoon!

And So, 'Ho Week' Comes to an End

Everybody Will Be Fired For Saying Something

Wonk'd: Shiny-Haired Media Whores

To Do: Friday the 13th

Feel the Terror of FRIDAY the 13th!!!

Everything in Country to be Named After Reagan, Bush

Cheney Now Hunting From the Skies

'Shock & Awe' Man On DC Madam's List

Gossip Roundup: Wild, Wild Life

Cartoon Violence Refuses To Declare The Pennies On Its Eyes

Wonkette Sponsors Demand Everyone's Resignation

Tucker: The Man and His Dream of Being Gene Rayburn

Are You Talkin' to Joe Klein? You Talkin' to Joe Klein?

World Bank Board Will Look Into It, Stop Bothering Them

Senate Subcommittee on Cuteness of Dogs Holds Hearing

Daily Briefing: Empty the Trash

Rumors On The Internets: Face The Music

Proper Sex Ed Being Taught Only in Overseas Embassies

House Hispanic Caucus Running Low on Saucy, No-Nonsense Congresswomen

World Bank Meeting Becomes Scene From "Logan's Run"

Perino: Our Only Crime Is Being Too Ethical

SVEN K UPDATE: DON IMUS LAST SURVIVOR OF POLITICAL CORRECTNESS APOCALYPSE

Metro Section: Fat

To Do: Pae in the Wind

Exclusive: Pissed-Off World Bank Employees Write Letters

Horse Stuck In Mud, NEVER FORGET!

GW Students Crushed by Crappy Commencement Speaker

Job Opportunity For Walnuts! ... Iraqi Tourism Director!

John Edwards Has a Crappy New 'Second Life' HQ

Moonie Times Runs Ad About Nappy-Headed Zionists

Gossip Roundup: Hunter for Prseident

In Defense of Don Imus

Wolfowitz Corrupt, Incompetent, In No Danger of Losing His Job

Walnuts Hates America's Youth

Daily Briefing: So it Goes

Hello, Babies, and Good-bye to Kurt Vonnegut

Rumors On The Internets: Underboss of This Holocaust

Metro Section: Meerkats

Troops to Require Additional Three Months of Support

Behold, the Power of the Corporate Blogosphere

'08 Shocker: Dem Strategists Lunch Monthly to Plan America's Defeat

US Officials Shocked That Other Officials Are Slightly Richer

Gossip Roundup: The Lady in the Hole

Rudy Wrong On Grocery Prices, Exactly Right On Tampax Prices

The Greatest Presidential Candidate Blog Post EVER

Rudy Giuliani: Stupid or Senile?

Washington Post Gives Up, Becomes Video Blog

To Do: Yet Also

Neil Cavuto's Liveblogging His Nervous Breakdown

Ask a Lobbyist: ...Only Outlaws Would Lobby

The Politico Hates America's Youth

Everybody Has Cancer: Fred Thompson Edition

Shut Up Hippies: A Wonkette PSA

WaPo Calls a Macaca a Macaca

An Open Letter to Washington Journalists

Daily Briefing: No Radio On The Internet

Metro Section: Questionable Men

Al Gore Priced Out, Forced to Move to Jersey

Rumors On The Internets: Ill Tempered

Hillary Is Not Going To Be Happy About This Mailer

Drink for Free Expression!

Meet the White House Easter Bunny

Iran Producing Books, DVDs & Action Figures of British Sailors

Jack Abramoff to Get Early Release, Hunt Down and Kill Gary Cooper

Gossip Roundup: Finger on the Button

House Committee On War Propaganda To Pick At National Scabs

To Do: Cats & Werewolves

YouTube: A Place For Liberals

Long National Nightmare Finally Getting Good Again: Gonzo Subpoenaed!

He Stood Sweating By the Pool, Holding Condi's Towel ...

You Ladies Have Some Catching Up To Do

Gonzo Forcing US Attorneys to Make Coffee, Pick Up his Laundry

Vanity Fair Sure to End in Tears, Scars

Daily Briefing: Tyrannosaurus Mex

Metro Section: Better Business Bunny

Giant Talking Rabbits Haunt White House

Rumors On The Internets: Also A Client

Sacrifice a Child for Community Day

Exile Update: Bush Now Fleeing Entire Planet

Iran Attacks Los Angeles ... Oh, It's Just Opening Day At Dodger Stadium

Fox Dem Debate to Feature Only Biden, Richardson, Hannity

George W. Bush Makes His Own Car Bomb

Gossip Roundup: Turn to the Right

George W. Bush Shocker: Not Retarded?!

Gonzales' Top Gal's Web Secrets Revealed!

Wolfowitz Pays Arab Gal $200,000 Per Year To Fuck Him

Red Chinese Commie Labor Camp ... In Washington!

Be Tom Tancredo's Low-Wage Media-Relations Mexican!

Boozy Solipsist Baffled, Alarmed by YouTube

CNN Bias Shocker!

Happy Anniversary, Liberated Baghdad!

Daily Briefing: Hangin' In A Chow Line

Wonkette's Week in Review: Gotta Serve Somebody

Rumors On The Internets: Katie Would've Known Better

Jesus' Easter Revenge on Virginia: Snow

Geraldo Finds the Only Person in the World Who Makes Him Seem Reasonable

Metro Section: Thumbs Way Down

Wonk'd: Washington, We Have a Problem

To Do: Laughing Pizza

Jesus-Loving Boy Scouts Defeat ACLU!

Gossip Roundup: Yeggs

Long-Haired Boy Rove Just As Evil In 1972

Chertoff Promises War On England

Cartoon Violence Sees Shades Of Grey

Bin Laden & Saddam Really Were Connected ... At Bush's Bank

New U.S. Attorney Is a Bible-Spewing Teenager

DC's Scuzziest Bachelors

Wonkette Sponsors Are First!

McCain's New Hire Loves Dogs

Breaking: You Were Right, They Were Wrong, Again

Daily Briefing: Josh Bolten & Adam The Kid

FRIST: Honoring the World's Worst Commenters

Rumors On The Internets: Human Services

DC Residents, Soul Asylum Urge Hoyer to Support Runaway Train Bill

Metro Section: Glass Boxes

Your Dinner With Novak

Romney Scandal: Candidate Has Never Even Shot a Lawyer

Who Wants To Be a Superpower?

CHENEY REPLICANT IMMINENT

Meet Your State's Crappy Easter Egg!

Gossip Roundup: Damien Cheney

Meet the Newt Gingrich of Eagles

To Do: Buckley or Bourbon

Obama Shocker: Long-Haired Barry Is American Idol

Deadly Boredom Fumes Clear Senate Office Building

Crackhead Teen Butterstick Now Living On Streets

We Will Never Forgive John Dickerson for This Mental Image

This National Review Cruise Is Sounding Better All the Time

Bush I, King of Peace to Reunite for One Last Show

Learn Spanish the Damage Control Way with Newt

Daily Briefing: Oh, Ate Too Much

Metro Section: Nuts

John Kerry Loses Again

Now Why Would a 40-Year-Old Intern Ever Do This to His Employer?

Happy MLK Assassination Day!

BREAKING: PAUL WOLFOWITZ NOT SINGLE

To Do: Japan WOW!

The Most Exciting Two Minutes of Washington Times White House Correspondent Joe Curl's Life

13 Slick Dudes, 1 Midget Lesbian & 1 Babushka

President Cheney to Rule for 4 Evil Android Years, 10,000 Hu-Man Years

Happy Good Friday! U.S. Attack On Iran Just One Day Away

McCain's Baghdad Market Photo-Op Kills 21 People

Ask a Lobbyist: Golf War

Four Hippies Toss Birkenstocks At Karl Rove's Car

Shrubbery Shocker: Cheney's Just Hiding Bush's Remote

The C-Word: Say It and You're Out of the Race

Brian Ross & His Prop Phone Take Wonkette's Peabody Award

Pelosi Trip Sponsored by NRSC

Michele Bachmann on the Road to Harrisdom

Daily Briefing: Springtime For Mittler

GOP Stooges Now Claim Sleestak-Rove-Coptix Picture Is Fake

Adios Walnuts? 'Chastened' McCain Wants a Do-Over

About That Karl Rove Picture, With the Sleestaks ...

Metro Section: Lead, Murder and Collar Poppin' Daddies

CNN's American Tragedy: O'Brien Firing Ends in Bloodshed

Romney Deathwatch: Mitt's Campaign Soon to be Partying With Jesus on Planet Heaven

Rumors On The Internets: Drop The Ball

Cheney's Life In the Bush of Ghosts

Dick Cheney Coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE

Gossip Roundup: Brunch Madness

And They Were All Eaten By Polar Bears, The End

Hotty McRedhead Quits White House, Still Lies About Iraq

The Corner Supports Most of the Troops!

To Do: Don't Pass Me Over

Lone MySpace Nut Ruins Barry Hussein's Campaign

Icy Sexpot Dana Perino Makes a Funny!

Mormons to Cheney: Even We Hate You Now

Next Year's Primaries to be Slightly Drunker Than Usual

Daily Briefing: Climb, Mate, Change, and Go Home

Metro Section: Bourgeoisie Hell

WaPo.com: Fuck You, You Love the Redesign

Rumors On The Internets: Doesn't Match The Drapes

Another Psychotic To Lose GOP Nomination

To Do: Fun-damentals

Oh WALNUTS! McCain's Henchmen Spread Dirty Lie About CNN Reporter

Cherry Blossom Pictures, Because You Live Here and Didn't Bother to Go

This Picture of Karl Rove IS A CRIME SCENE!

Gossip Roundup: La AUDACIA de la ESPERANZA

Kissinger Tapes Reveal We Are Still Living In 1972

Bush Impeached! (In This One Guy's Mind)

"DOG-KILLER-MARRIER" to be Added to Stock Rudy Description

Obama Clearly Not Ugly Enough To Raise Big Money

Stephanopouloses Still Overcompensating for Something Daily

Lamar Alexander: We're on the Eve of Disctruction

Other Thompson Also Running For President

Daily Briefing: Delivery Of The Sphere

Wonkette's Week in Review: XXX: The Suffix and the Vitamin Water

Rumors On The Internets: It's Great With Pity

Metro Section: Competition, Looting and Romance

Second Life Also Destroys the Environment!

Michelle Malkin Sex-Fantasy Shocker: 'I'm An Anonymous White Man'

Wonk'd: A Soft, Moist, Shapeless Mass of Matter

Gossip Roundup: Lou Dobbs, Protectionist

To Do: Saturday Looks Good To Me

Heckuva Job, Mappie: Google Disappears Post-Katrina Map Pix

Al Makes It Official: He's In It & He's In It To Win

World Net Daily Really Rooting For Nuclear War

China Taking Our Jobs, Killing Our Pets

Cartoon Violence Will Smash Your Web Of Lies To Bits

Wonkette Sponsors Are Not Dropping Out of the Race

Today's Krauthammer Column Inspired by Little Green Alien Only He Can See

French Politics in Second Life Exactly the Same as French Politics in Real Life

Daily Briefing: Pleased To Repeat It

Rumors On the Internets: Turn and Face the Strain

No Blood For Mohel

Metro Section: Liquidstigation

Al Gore to Announce Secret Plan to End Iraq War

Fareed Zakaria: Most Extreme Creationist Ever

McCain Was Talking About the Second Life Version of Iraq

Tom Price Hates the '90s

Dear President Ahmadinejad: Please Kidnap Kyra Phillips

War Weary Nation Begs John Kerry To Shut Up

To Do: You Don't Love Me Yet

DC's Rock & Roll Hotel Competely Haunted by Dead People

Not Even Saudi King Will Touch Dubya Now

Gossip Roundup: Gala Day

HUD Hates Freedom

Karl Rove Cracks Himself Up Mocking Black People

Broder Shocker: Presidents Reluctant to Fire Appointees

Fred Thompson's Residuals Threatened by Possible Pres Run

Your Monthly Unsubstantiated Republican Outing

Daily Briefing: A Man Who Swears He's Not to Blame

Metro Section: Freedom Rock Chat

Paranoid Crazy Person Head of GSA

Rumors On The Internets: The Brash and the Nebbish

Bush Administration Has Double-Secret Private Communication System

Wonkette Party Crash: 'The Week' Magazine Opinion Awards '07

Gossip Roundup: Oyster Easter Queen

James Dobson: 'Fred Thompson Worships Satan'

Bill Richardson Threatens 'Nuclear 9/11' & Al Gore's Life

Ask a Lobbyist: Sheen is Believing

San Francisco Bans Plastic Bags & Republicans

Jim Webb Will Shoot You On Sight With His Unregistered Pistol

Vilsack Takes Dive, Makes Bank

Hero Cops Taser, Arrest Dick Cheney

World War III Proceeding Apace

Daily Briefing: These Colors Run

Metro Section: Butt City

Rumors On The Internets: 180 Seconds In Heaven

Only Obama Can Save Us From Law & Order Guy

We Get E-Mail!

TIME Joins Newsweek In Mocking America's Idiocy

Gossip Roundup: Taco Salad Days

To Do: No, Mimi!

Alberto Gonzales' Gay-Teen-Sex Cover-Up Shocker!

Wonkette Party Crash: Radicals for Capitalism Book Party

Hey Everybody, Here's a Rumor About Laura Bush!

Dear WALNUTS! ... THNX 4 DA AD

2008 Shocker: Giuliani Supporters Don't Love Hillary!

You're On the List

Breaking: Clintons to Snub Tony Snow

Daily Briefing: Being There

LA Times Offered $$$ Guest-Editor Spots To Rumsfeld, Nixon & Saddam

Rumors On The Internets: The Admirals Orientation Booklet Musclebound Specimen Said

John Edwards Shocking Claim: 'Clintons Won't Wish Us Well!'

Metro Section: How Easy Is Your Intern?

Duncan Hunter's Son Duncan Hunter Now Just Doing His Dad's Work For Him

Democrats Now Stalking America

UPDATE: Jim Webb's Gun-Toting Staffer Also a Marine & Will Kill Us All

Moonie Times Wins For Best Government Reporting!

BREAKING: JIM WEBB HIMSELF ACTUALLY ARRESTED!

Guess Who Hates the Troops? Oh, WALNUTS!

Scumbag Smithsonian Chief Resigns!

To Do: The Naked and the Dead

Republican Family Values: Fred Thompson's Trophy Wife

STAFFER ARRESTED IN WEBB GUN SCANDAL (MAYBE)

Lou Dobbs Has So Many Anti-Mexican Superpowers

Loser Who Dropped Out Praises Own Determination

Hot Alaska Guv Actually Just a Snow Dwarf

Bloomberg Probably Running For President, Unless He's Not

Daily Briefing: Don't Tell Mom

Wonkette's Week in Review: Keep On Truckin'

Comics Curmudgeon To Return To Poorly Drawn Fantasy Land

'Presumption of Criminality' Kept Bush, Cheney From 9/11 Testimony

Rumors On The Internets: Born For Porn

Gossip Roundup: And His Website Has "Benformation," We Swear To God

Metro Section: Cutting Edge Visual Stylings

Cartoon Violence Wants More Violence

Wonkette Sponsors Didn't Screw Steve Griles

White House Prop Masters Getting Desperate

Tom Tancredo Is Completely Crazy

Tony Snow Tries Stealing Elizabeth Edwards' Thunder

Wonk'd: Down The Road And Back Again

Homeland Security Bureaucrats Moving To Lunatic Asylum

America Tells Terrorists: 'We Give Up!'

Michele Bachmann's Other Fan Writes a Letter

Surprise! D.C.'s New Voting Representative Is A White Republican

To Do: Battles, Miss Manners, or Clinton's Dorm Room

Viral "1984" Videos: Oh, They Get Worse

Israeli Diplomacy Features Awful Web Design, Annoying Music That Plays When The Page Loads Whether You Like It Or Not

Obama Won't Buy Hobo Buddy A Sammich!

CIA: Couldn't Prevent 9/11, But Great With Spirit Gum

Daily Briefing: Disturbing Disguises

'Oh No, I'm Being Attacked By a Space Monster'

Senate Historians Think Everything's Funny When They're High

Rumors On the Internets: First Prize Is One Week In DC, Second Prize Is Two Weeks

'I Bet Some of Rudy's Ex-Wives Have Cancer'

Tony Snow Has Not Had a Good Year

Metro Section: Punk's Not Dead

We Get Letters: Pink Floyd, Nazis, Clinton & the CIA

EXCLUSIVE PICTURE: First Godless, Then Faceless, Now Nameless And Dateless

Washed-Up Whoremonger To Lend Credibility To YouTube Nut

Wonkette Party Crash: Hotline Says Good-bye To Chuck Todd

To Do: Murder For 1,000

Gossip Roundup: Agent Of A Foreign Principal

He's In, He's Out!

BREAKING ... GUY WHO LIKES OBAMA MADE PRO-OBAMA VIDEO

Magic Of Internet Streaming Video Allows For Queasy, Uncomfortable Live-Blogging After All

BREAKING: Edwards To Suspend Campaign, Maybe, Possibly, Don't Rely On Us For Hard News For God's Sake

FCC Saves America

Hey Ladies! Hateful Warmonger Now Single, Ready To "Doctor" Your "Intelligence"

Sexy Latino Bush Heads Out To Sea

Daily Briefing: Dear John

John Edwards: Dropping Out?

Beware, Conservatives! Fred Thompson Is a 'Neocon Globalist'

Rumors On The Internets: Bangin' in Little Rock

Ha Ha, Stupid Firemen ...

Loser To Endorse Other Loser

Metro Section: We Shall All Be Healed

America Prepares for War On Mordor

ABC's The Note Loses Top White House Fellator

GOP Banking On America's Furryphobia

DC Metro To Lose Iconic Filthy Frayed Moldy Carpet

White House Threatens Democracy With Veto

John Kerry Figures Out a Way To Ruin Basketball, Too

Gossip Roundup: Red-Hot Murphy-On-Murphy Action

Ask A Lobbyist: Portrait Of The Lobbyist As A Big-Haired Young Woman

To Do: Heyday, Yorn, or the Persian New Year

Desperate George Allen Accepts Part-Time Work

YouTube To Set Campaign Ad Production Values Back Decades

NYT: Al Gore Drunk, Hungry

Daily Briefing: Do You Want To Permanently Delete?

Metro Section: A Is For Angry

Rumors On The Internets: More Lying Facists Where He Came From

Liveblogging Bush's 5:45 P.M. Announcement of Something

Bush To Resign At 5:45 P.M.

Tom Tancredo Wants Alberto Gonzales Deported

Newt's Five Reasons To Be Hopeful About the Future

Have You Ever Looked At Dana Milbank? We Mean, Really Looked At Dana Milbank?

Mission Accomplished! Iraq No Longer World's Shittiest Place To Live

Gossip Roundup: Wolf Blitzer Makes Ultimate Sacrifice

Wonkette Party Crash: MOCA DC's Erotica 2007

R2D2 Smuggling Death Star Plans From White House

Mrs. Milbank At the Post Will Be Furious

And Here's Bill Richardson, the Flying Mexican

BREAKING ... CHENEY BACK IN HOSPITAL

To Do: Francophonie, Vietnam, or Heroin

BREAKING: Bush Offers Gonzales His Support; Gonzales Clearly Doomed

Brits Have Much To Teach Us About Prostitution-Related Political Scandals

Irresponsible Uninformed Speculation: OMG SEXIEST CABINET SECRETARY EVER

Mary Worth Update: Momentum For VICTORY

Daily Briefing: Showcase Showdown

Rumors On The Internets: Pale In Comparison

Metro Section: Functionally Alliterative

GOP Readies Unstoppable Thompson-Thompson Ticket For 2008

Washington Guessing Game: Someone's Beautiful Launderette

Beatnik Comic Michael Alan Weiner Considers 2008 Run

Gossip Roundup: First Daughter

Mitt Romney Vows To Lead Worldwide Revolution

To Do: Math Marketing

Bill Richardson Loses Weight, Wears Stupid Cowboy Necklace

Brer Walnuts Gwine Larn Dat Tar Baby

Proof: 60 Percent Of House Of Representatives Crazier Than Ted Kennedy

Michele Bachmann's E-Mail Strategy Really Works!

FOUR MORE YEARS! Liveblogging Bush's Greatest Speech

Terrifying Run-Up To WWIII Provides Opportunity For Dick Joke

Lonely WALNUTS! Blames Friendless State On Technical Glitch Rather Than Personality

Comics Curmudgeon Returns To Save Washington From Itself

Daily Briefing: Federal Persecutors

Wonkette's Week in Review: There's a Bloggie in Our Diaper!

WALNUTS! McCain Is a Battlestar TeeVee Space Monster!

Voices From the Heartland Show Love For WALNUTS! McCain

Rumors On The Internets: Tenacious AG, The Dick of Destiny

Metro Section: You'd Muder if You Worked for AOL, Too

Brazilian Protest Gal's Incredible True Story!

MSM Refuses to Report on Plame Trannie

Lovable Cheney Cheered by Happy Crowd

To Do: Housey Keyboard Accents

Gossip Roundup: On a Curve

Wonk'd: Rudy Will Sign Buttcheeks If You Just Ask Nicely

Happy Fourth Birthday, Iraq War!

Washington Bureaucrats: Dumb as a Box of Hair

Ken Starr Hates Jesus, Free Speech and Bong Hits

Cartoon Violence Presents: The Way Things Oughta Be

Wonkette Sponsors Invite You to Climb Aboard

Valerie Plame Testifies to Congress About How Cool It Would've Been if Her Scandal Had Gone Somewhere

Everyone's Sick of Riding the WALNUTS Express

Daily Briefing: Nights and Responsibilities

Rumors On The Internets: Love Hate, Hate Everything Else

Georgians Apparently Not Proud of Their Best Export Since The B-52's

To Do: James Dobson, Nude Models and Manischewitz

Eternal Sunshine of the Hopeless Candidate

John McCain Endorses George Allen

Useless Mailboxes Disguised As Helpful Robot Friends

Gossip Roundup: Slipstream

A Treasury of Brazilian Anti-Bush Protest Pix

Metro Section: Cheese Fetish, Turban Fetish, Tired Attempts at Humor Through Misogyny Fetish

California OKs Feb. 5 Primary; New Hampshire Primary Tomorrow

Cheney Picnic Sites Discovered In DC, Maryland

Lieberman & Chertoff Will Bravely Destroy Internet

Patrick Leahy Has a Looooong Memory

Two Now Powerless Has-Beens Yelling at Each Other in Books

Khalid Shaikh Mohammed Confesses to Everything Ever

Daily Briefing: Refried

Metro Section: Food, Money and 90s Celebrities

Hugo Chavez Funding Rudy Giuliani's Campaign

Rumors On the Internets: When You Reach Rant Bottom

John Sununu: Fire Alberto Gonzales

Revealed: Wonkette's Plan To Make You All Scientologists

To Do: Murder, Rumsfeld and Regional Differences

From the Inbox: A Letter for Michele

Jesus-Loving Americans Totally Ignorant of Jesus, Religion

Tim Johnson Assures Us He's Still Running Cuba

Democrats Decide They Need To Keep Gitmo Open

Mouth-Breathing Racist Cop Latest To Call Rep. Keith Ellison a Terrorist

Ask a Lobbyist: Ohio Players

Happy South American Wedding Engagement, Jenna!

Hillary's "Fuck You '07" Tour A Resounding Success

Senate to Fail to Pass Bill Politely Asking Pres to Give a Shit About Bill They Couldn't Pass

Nobody Likes Gonzales Anymore, Even Though He Said He Was Kinda Sorry

Daily Briefing: Eyes Roll, Heads Fine

Metro Section: Death, Coffee and Guns

America On the Brink: Dollar Coin Found WITH NO FACE

Markets Continue Their Death Rattle

Bush Thrilled by Exotic Foreign Foods, Very Concept of Eating

Rumors On the Internets: Odds Are Good, But the Goods Are Odd

Alberto Gonzales Is a Blockhead

McCain Calls for Escalation of March Madness

OBAMA WINS ... Internet Website Comparison Test

Whoremongers Relieved; DC Madam Won't Sell Client List

BREAKING: ALBERTO GONZALES LIVES TO JUSTIFY ATROCITIES ANOTHER DAY

BREAKING: GONZO DOESN'T QUIT, TELLS AMERICA TO FUCK OFF, DIE

To Do: Vinyl Pants

George H.W. Bush, Live On Stage In Los Angeles!

Gossip Roundup: Gimme Shelter

Harriet Miers Is Really Happy About Gonzo's Troubles

Fight Them Over There So We Won't Have To Fight Them Over Here

First Thing Harriet Miers Recommended, Let's Fire All the Lawyers

No Homophone Escapes Dana Milbank's Eagle Eye

Most of Army Drunk, Fat

Daily Briefing: Lists, Fists, Mist

Rumors On The Internets: Attention Pleas

Metro Section: Best Minds of Our Generation

Buy Dick Cheney a Burger, Get Your Name on an NSA Watchlist For No Additional Cost

Some Terrorists Are Blondes, World Stunned

Dick Morris Is/Isn't DC Madam Client, Still a Dick

Nobody Right-Wing Senator Endorses Rudy's War On Fetuses

Goddamned Atheist Snuck Into Congress (In 1973)

To Do: You Can Repair Yourself

Gossip Roundup: Smoking With the Boys Upstairs

McCain Running For President of Death Star

OMFG Wonkette Wins the Bloggie!

Wonkette Party Crash: Hirshhorn Museum 'After Hours'

So That's What Bush Is Doing In South America ...

S&M Ambassador Found Naked, Drunk, Bound

Cheney Fleeing To Dubai

HEY GUYS CHUCK HAGEL'S GONNA SAY SOMETHING

Obama to Iowa: Do You Like Me? Circle One Y/N

Daily Briefing: Marching Power

Wonkette's Week in Review: Innocence Lost

Rumors On The Internets: Get Naked and Rub

Anti-Bush Protesters Protest George W. Bush Visit

WALNUTS McCain Tutored by ... Kissinger

Guns, Horses, to be Introduced to DC

Rove: Obama's Articulate, So He Can't Be President

Wonk'd: Jimmy Rotten

Metro Section: Murder Ballads

South Americans Welcome George W. Bush ... With Style!

Howard Kurtz Plagued By Dirty Thoughts About Ann Coulter

Mayan Priests To Cleanse Ancient Temple After Bush Visit

Cartoon Violence Has Stared Into The Abyss

To Do: Have a Very Ian Weekend

Wonkette Sponsors are Withdrawing Really Soon, They Promise

Daily Briefing: Pride Only Hurts

Rumors On The Internets: Pollock and Pot Luck

Cheney: The Next Fall Guy?

Metro Section: Young Guns

Decoding the New York Times

Literary Libby: Remembering Scooter's Bestiality Book

To Do: Do All Three

The Wit & Wisdom of Chuck Hagel

Gossip Roundup: Can't Start a Fire

Pulitzer Finalists: A Bunch of Three-Part Articles Nobody Read

And Then He Divorced Her & Abandoned the Children ...

Cheney: 'The Administration's Enemy Within'

Our Advice: Convince Him to Run For President

Illegals Take Over Drudge

Novak: Ha ha ha ha ha, I Got Off Scot-Free

Scooter Libby: The Final Nail in Journalism's Coffin

Daily Briefing: Dodge City

Barry Obama: Unsafe At Any Speed, Especially "Parked"

Rumors On The Internets: The Answer Is Always 'C'

BREAKING: BUSH MAYBE WON'T PARDON LIBBY

Hillary & Walter Cronkite Will Jointly Rule the Earth

David Gergen Is Mentally Retarded

Metro Section: Our Town

Spend Only Genuine Godless Coins on Your Satanic Vending Machine Fare

Comic Book Version of America Dies, Too

State Dept. Stands Up For Rich British Comedian's Human Rights

Vampire Killer Ends Milosevic's Political Career

To Do: Drinking, Crying or the French Revolution

Ask a Lobbyist: The Five Members You Meet in Seven Minutes in Heaven

Gossip Roundup: The List

Dancing With the Pols

Oh No! Snow!

We Will Not Rest Until Scooter is Free

Libby Jury Made Up of Idiots

Daily Briefing: Do Not Pass Go

Metro Section: Spicy

Poppy Bush Denies Groping TV Performer's Ass

Rumors On The Internets: Scooter's Behymen

The Scooter Libby Trial's Real Winner

Totalitarian 'Big Hillary' To Be Defeated By Blonde '80s Jogger Representing Barry Obama and Apple Computer

Pentagon Introduces New Vomit Ray

To Do: Violence

What Happens When You Send Us a Friendly Email Inviting Wonkette to Join 'Second Life'

Jenna Bush To Solve AIDS & Poverty & Holocaust

Wonkette's Picture of the Day

EXCLUSIVE LEGAL MUMBO JUMBO: What Will Happen to Scooter?

Silly Foreigners Think Cheney's Human

Another Putin Critic Shot ... In Suburban Maryland

Gossip Roundup: Tancredo and the Bandit

How Long Will Scooter Libby's Unjust Imprisonment Drag On?

We're Number Three! USA USA USA!

No One Wants to Work for Senator Too-Crazy-to-be-President

Once Again, New Media Blows the MSM Out of the Water

SCOOTER LIBBY: INNOCENT

Madeleine Albright's Disembodied Head to Haunt Your Beer Runs

Daily Briefing: No Leg To Stand On

George F. Will, Libtard, Calls Ann Coulter 'Him'

Metro Section: Zero in 2007

George Soros Buys 2 Million Shares of Halliburton

Rumors On The Internets: 69 Degrees

ECONOMY TO COLLAPSE FURTHER AT NEWS OF ANOTHER CHENEY BRUSH WITH DEATH

Edwards HQ Cyber-Vandals: Non-Partisan Pranksters

Wonkette Operative Special Mission: Be Michele Bachmann's Intern!

Hillary Attempts to Join Cast of 'Designing Women' Two Decades Too Late

WashTimes Teaches Rudy Important Lesson on Tolerance

To Do: Journos, Germans or Jargon

Giuliani's Kids Hate Him, Too

Gossip Roundup: Hot Wax

'08 Candidates Fight Over Minority Body Parts

Hollywood Values: Cops Force Infertility Shots On Young Girls

Another Political Commentator Says Something Provocative!

Next On CNN: Coulter's Withered Tits

CPAC In Review

Daily Briefing: Must Try Harder

Wonkette's Week in Review: Hello Pander Bears

Rumors On The Internets: The Enemy of My Enemy Is a Rat Bastard

Ann Coulter Says Something Provokizzzzzzzzzz

Secretary of the Army Brought To Justice

McCain Even Crazier About this WALNUTS! Thing Than We Are

Metro Section: OMG!

Wonk'd: Irrelevancy Interrupted

Rats Seize G-Town Burger Hut From Redskins' Owner

Tony Snow: America's Greatest White House Press Secretary

WALNUTS! Promises Eternal War & Fed Control of Everything

To Do: One Little Diddy

Nagin Lunches With Bush, Promptly Sues Federal Government

Feces-Spewing Obscenity Sickens 150 Hotel Guests

Cheney To China: 'Open Your Underwear, Let Me See What's Inside'

Gossip Roundup: The Boys on the Bench

Cartoon Violence Likes One Thing About Six Cartoons

Wonkette Sponsors Are Breaching Your Security

TSA Heroically Prevents Al Gore Hijacking Attempt

BREAKING: Obama's Ancestors Enslaved Sharpton Family

World War III!

Daily Briefing: No Justice, No Peace

John Edwards' Sad, Lonely Cyberworld

Rumors On The Internets: Too Bad Dick Cheney Didn't Get Blowed Up The Other Day

BREAKING: RICK SANTORUM'S CRYING DAUGHTER TO HOST LATE-NIGHT FOX SHOW

A Desperate Plea

Wonkette Party Crash: Michael Musto's Book Party

The Best Restaurant in DC

Boston Shuts Down Again, Over Terrorist Traffic-Counter Box

Doug Feith's Stupidest Fucking Website on the Internet

Metro Section: Best News Ever

Wash 'Times' Continues to Lead the Pack in Hilariously Unprofessional Behavior, General Nuttiness

Homebound Geeks Saddened By Other Geeks' Virtual Attack On John Edwards' Make-Believe Computer-Game Cyber Headquarters

To Do: Fashion, Fascism, Riesling

'Why I Hate Blacks' Column Causes Controversy

Meet America's Newest Loser Presidential Candidate!

Gossip Roundup: Coffee Talk

Bob Ney Says Goodbye to His Friends in Low Places

WP Not Sure How Much You Should be Panicking Right Now

Administration Almost Admits to Lying About NK, Heavens Open Up and Prepare to Swallow Earth

Daily Briefing: See BS

Oh, WALNUTS! McCain Announces, On Letterman Show

BBC, CNN Employ Magical Psychic News Announcers

Rumors On The Internets: Push Up Those Daisies, Push 'Um Up Harder!

End Journalist Trafficking

Metro Section: Our Inferno

Obama's Facebook Outrage: No New Friends!

Gossip Roundup: Power Trip

Washington Post Losing Ads, Circulation, Income, Everything

Laura Bush Slightly Misunderestimates Iraq Attacks

Ask a Lobbyist: Sea Breeze

GOP Sex Scandal Cover-Up Would Be Huge, But It's In Missouri

To Do: The Civil War or the White House Chef

Even When Your Cell Phone's Off, the Feds Are Listening

Senior Administration Official Guessing Game: The Only Hint Was a Faint Smell of Sulphur

A Blogger's Confession: My Bad

Daily Briefing: Money Pit

Rumors On The Internets: Always Robin, Never Batman

FOX Reports: Everything's Been Fine in Iraq Since December!

Metro Section: Few More Reasons to Leave Washington

Radio Shack Behind Iraq Attacks

Black Tuesday to Ensure Third Bush Term

So That's Why Cheney Won't Return To America ...

Cheney's Back-Up Baby Cellar Busted by Cops

Here's a Roll Call Story About Congress: MUST CREDIT ABC NEWS

To Do: Go Exploring

Cheney Also Ruining Stock Market

Zombie European Politicians Feast On Human Brains

Gossip Roundup: Used Cars

Wonkette Will Totally Win This NRA Essay Contest

Document: Mitt Romney Hates France, Self

Joe Lieberman a Reliable Democrat on Everything but One Little Quagmire

Assassination Attempt Inspires Cheney's First Near-Smile in Years

Daily Briefing: Bombs Over Bagram

Rumors On The Internets: Edit This!

Metro Section: Isn't Life Juicy?

Gore Also Using More Toilet Paper Than Most Americans

Scott v. Harris Most Thrilling, Chilling SCOTUS Case Since The People v. Mad Max

Quantico's War On Virginia Garage Doors

Gossip Roundup: Party Line

Jimmy Carter Targeted By Bush 41's Bizarre UFO Scam

Vilsack Short Bus Screeches To a Halt

Fox News Attacks 'Iraq Snobs' For Supporting the Troops

To Do: These Luntz

Scooter Jury Down To 11, Mistrial Avoided ... For Now

Requiem For Wolf Blitzer's Dignity

Sharpton Pwnd by Thurmond

Al Gore Wins Oscar, Promptly Agrees to Star in "Snow Dogs 2: An Inconvenient Pooch"

Daily Briefing: Dix

Wonkette's Week in Review: Building Toward the Climax

Rumors On The Internets: Not Heaven, Not Iowa Either

Finally Cementing Its Utter Irrelevance, 'New Republic' Now Owned by Canadians

Fox News Launches Another Comedy Show, Starring Michelle Malkin

BREAKING: DOES OBAMA HAVE AN ISLAMIST HAIRCUT?

New Radiation Logo Actually Warns Of Space Monsters

Metro Section: Linkin, Blinkin and Nod

To Do: Free Popcorn, Free Booze, Free Death Knell

Wonk'd: Crispy Twister Sandwich is Its Own Happy Ending

Gossip Roundup: Tubes, Tied

Bush Would Be Popular If Not For Secular Hollywood & Your Father

Wonkette Party Crash: Washington Life's The Young and the Guest List

Michele Bachmann Knows Secret U.S. Surrender Plan For Iraq

We Gave Vilsack 'Buzz' & He Still Bailed

Cartoon Violence Demands Answers

Wonkette Sponsors Want You to Take a Survey and Win a Contest

VILSACK TO DROP OUT OF RACE, TAKE CONTROL VIA VIOLENT COUP INSTEAD

Obama's Haircut Defense

Rice Warns Chimps They Risk Further Sanctions

Daily Briefing: Circuit's dead, There's Something Wrong

Rumors On The Internets: Opportunity Cocks

Metro Section: Smart People Writing Well, Free Chili & Secret Sushi

ABC Apparently Under Mistaken Impression There is Justice in This World

Cheney Pool Report Orgy Revealed to Be Usual Circle Jerk Session

Mike Huckabee Reenacts His Favorite Scene from 'Miller's Crossing'

Sam Brownback Gives Himself an Even Goofier Name

Hottest-Ever Bush Is Weird, Helps Poor

Lieberman Always Plotting Against Us

Conservapedia Already Ravaged by Libtards

Great Schism of '07: Late Night Shots Locks Undesirables In Open Forum

Everything Is Biased Against Conservatives

To Do: Or, Say Goodbye to 'The O.C.'

Terror Porn Fantasy Puts WALNUTS! McCain In the White House

Gossip Roundup: 75 to Life

Ask a Lobbyist: Who Left All This Garbage on the Steps of Congress?

Revealed: The Single Dorkiest Shirt Ever

Barry Hussein Obama: Marxist Terrorist?

White House Press Corps/VPOTUS Orgy Alluded to in Pool Report

John McCain Hates Donald Rumsfeld Sooooo Much

Daily Briefing: Sticks and Stoners

Rumors On The Internets: No Less Than 1,478,000 Morons In America

Iran, US to Have Slumber Party

God Punishes France With Global Warming, Giant Hornets

Senate Nonbinding Resolution Forces Resignation ...

To Do: Unhook

Steny Hoyer Is a Crook, Too

Sandy Berger Is a National Hero

Metro Section: D'vine

Dem Forum Video ... But Not For You Commie Mac Users!

John Edwards Did NOT Say Anything Sorta Possibly Negative About Israel Bombing Iran

Victory In Iraq: New Oil Law Helps Needy Western Oil Companies

'Dancing With the Stars' Shuns Washington

Ted Stevens to Tie Your Tubes

Further Proof That Your Job Sucks

Daily Briefing: A Warm Place With No Memory

Rumors On The Internets: Don't Be Yourself

Metro Section: Ripe Female Flesh

Tony Blair Hates Our Freedoms, Pulling Troops From Iraq

How Terrorists Become Republican Senate Inner Circle Members

Tim Johnson Out of Hospital, Dick Cheney Weeps

AL GORE IS CAUSING GLOBAL WARMING, WHICH IS A MYTH, BUT IT'S STILL HIS FAULT

John Edwards Expresses Concern Over Israel-Iran War, Loses Nomination

It's Obama Vs. Ron Paul ... On MySpace

To Do: Go Wild

Gossip Roundup: Cut and Walk

Juanita Millender-McDonald Is First Lunatic To Chair Committee

Asteroid Will Kill Everybody ... Except the Bushes, In Paraguay

Washington DC to Become Quaint Portrait of a Simpler Time, Also Drown

Why Everyone Will Lose in 2008

Daily Briefing: The Biggest Nuts

Obama Campaigns For L.A. Billionaire Money In L.A. Black Neighborhood

Rumors On The Internets: Then You Don't Go Killing All The Bees

Bush Finds Many Similarities Between George Washington & Himself

John McCain's Stripper Ex Soon to Be Available for Interviews

Gossip Roundup: Tiger in Your Tank

Bigshot GOP Contributor Charged With Funding Al Qaeda

Wonkette Party Crash: Garutachi Underwear Dance Night

Iraq War Caused by Saddam Dissing USA

To Do: Open the Pod Bay Doors

Bush Wants To Make Romance In Bin Laden's Butt

Heavy Metal House of Representatives

While You Were Sleeping Honoring the Presidents

Wonkette's Week in Review: Wild Mardi Gras Saturday Senate Vote

Metro Section: What A Cut Up

Later, Everybody

Rumors On The Internets: Nevada To Die Under Mysterious Circumstances

John McCain's Terrifying New Website

Traitorous Hippies Pass Anti-American Resolution

Jim Gibbons: Probably Really Nevada's Governor, Definitely A Corrupt Scumbag

Mass. State Senator Unleashes Devastating "I'm Rubber, You're Glue" Defense

Dan Gerstein Hates You, Blogger

We Will Not Let Tom Vilsack Forget Who He Is

Wonk'd: Fox and Sanchez, Clean and Dirty

Cartoon Violence Thinks A Melody Is Like A Pretty Girl

To Do: Martin Garbus, English Country Dancing and the Chinese New Year

Gossip Roundup: Madeleine's Garage

Gay Hater Admonished On Proper Gay-Hating Techniques

Corrupt N.C. Legislator Stands Up Straight And Pleads Guilty

Kurtz on Malkin: The Lighter Side of Crypto-Fascism

Ga. State Legislator: Evolution A Lie, Earth Flat, Jews In Control

Wonkette Sponsors Are Blaming the Quds Force

Bono Now So Lame Even North Dakotans Spurn Him

Iran's QUDS FORCE Revealed!

Sam Brownback Nearly Performing at the Level of a Vegetable

Daily Briefing: No Class

Hotline Headline of the Month

Jim Webb's Slanderbox

Rumors On The Internets: Honkers and Headlights

Virgil Goode, Passionate Defender of the Nickel

Metro Section: Totally High

Europeans: They're Just Like Us!

Senate to Convene on Day You Have Off For First Time in History

US Nearly Finished Building Thunderdome

Al Franken Was Also Reponsible for "LateLine"

BREAKING: Rich, Shallow Morons Say Hilariously Awful Things

Fake Governor Under Real Investigation

Barry Obama Urges Staff to Put Him Out of His Misery

To Do: Get Professional or Go To a House Show

Superhero Makes Sure Kids Stay In School

Gossip Roundup: Next Friday

House Iraq Vote to Happen in the Middle of the Night With all the Lights Turned Off

U.S. Mint Banking On Americans' Love Of Dead White Men

Justice Kennedy: Give Us More Money Or You Can Interpret The God-Damned Constitution Yourself

Iran Possesses Deadly "Paint" Technology

Rudy Giuliani Will Run For President, He Guesses

Edwards To Pin Down Crucial Techno-Savvy Shut-In Vote

Rumsfeld Apparently Not Craziest Defense Secretary Ever

Daily Briefing: Obama Sucks, A-Rod Swallows

Kitty Has a Valentine For George Tenet

Rumors On The Internets: Bao-Chika Wow Wah

Iowa Loves John McCain

If Iraq Keeps Shooting Us, We'll Stop Mowing Their Lawn: Great Moments in House Rhetoric

Nevadans Soon To Enjoy Glorious, Somalia-Style Leaderless Anarchy

Terrorist Congressman Terrorizes Non-Terrorist Congressman

Metro Section: Heart Attack

Justice Scalia's Daughter, Like Father, Danger to Self, Others

Sick, Corrupt Old Man Frolics Pantsless In Florida

MSM Conspiracy To Control All Information Collapses In Mutual Acrimony

To Do: "I Need Him Like the Axe Needs the Turkey."

Ask a Lobbyist: Lady Pelosi's Pearls

Dick Cheney + Sausage + Slow News Day = Hilarity

Ex-SNL Comedian To Blaze Trail For Future Congressman Joe Piscopo

Gossip Roundup: Love is the Drug

Obamamania To Destroy Democratic Party

Finally, a Protest Lazier Than Second Life's

24 Writer: Don't Copy Us, We Really Don't Have Time To Do It Right

Another Half-Assed Liveblogging of Another Half-Assed Bush Press Conference

They Still Aren't Accepting War Criminals, So It's OK

DC SHOCKED BY FROZEN WATER, CLOUDS

Cunningham/Foggo/Wilkes Prostitupalooza 2003

I'm "back"

Daily Briefing: The Hookers Are Still Available

Metro Section: Cuppy Cake

Rumors On The Internets: An Intuitive Process

Indictments For Disgraced CIA No 3 & Defense Contractor

'Politico' Provides Wall-to-Wall 'Politico' Coverage

Dick Cheney Not Going to Be Forced to Flee the Country... Yet

U.S. Will Attack Iran, Austria, China and U.S.

To Do: Fishtails on the Beltway

ICY DEATH RAINS FROM THE SKY ONTO UNPREPARED WASHINGTON

Georgia Congressman Loses Cancer 'Debate'

DC Cop Has Had It With You Liberals

Gossip Roundup: Back Seat Driver

Army Brass Beg 24: 'Stop Torturing Everybody'

Al Qaeda: Bush Is a Dumb Drunky Drunk Liar!

Return of WatergateGate: Foggo to Be Indicted?

PHIL GINGREY SHAVED (MUST CREDIT WONKETTE)

Janis Karpinski Heckles, Tortures Lindsay Graham

Armitage to Woodward: "#*@(#$(&!"

McCain Just Following Romney Around the Country to Annoy Him

Iran President's Iraq Plan Remarkably Similar to Most '08 Dem Candidates'

Daily Briefing: Like It Taut

Walnuts McCain Worries Iraq War Could Become Unpopular!

Metro Section: Flower

Rumors On The Internets: In The Heat Of Passion, Sometimes You Do

Tom Coburn Will Destroy These Iranian Collaborators

Journos: Ari Did It

Live Nude Rising Stars!

Salon: Barry Hussein Macaca Doesn't Know His Place

John Howard Even Gave His Child To Bush!

Bush Henchmen Scouting South America Again

Madame Speaker Needs a Toilet!

To Do: Urban Dictionary

Gossip Roundup: Only the Lonely

When Obama's President, We're Bombing Australia

Press Releases We Wish We Hadn't Read: One in an Occasional Series

Clinton Still Under Fire for Count Chocula Pardon

The Midwest: It's All the Same to The Note

Capitol Hill Restaurant Promises Delicious Loopholes Delivered to Your House Office

Draft Kitty Harris for America!

International Small Arms Traffic Blues

Daily Briefing: Didja View?

Wonkette's Week in Review: Oh Time, Great Healer

Cigarettes Are Sad Because Barack Quit Smoking

Rumors On The Internets: Put 'Em On Da Marble Ceiling

'Somebody-somebody-somebody, an actress with a TV show...'

Identity Thieves to Prayer Breakfast Volunteers: Where's Your God Now?

Cartoon Network Head Takes Responsibility for Lite-Brite Attack, Steps Down

Metro Section: Just The Blades, Please

Booger Eater: Ohio Republican Steve Chabot?

Wonk'd: Winter Wonderland

Gossip Roundup: Book Party Girl

Karl Rove's Son Won't Be Doing Mexican Work

Point of Order: Quit Eating Your Boogers!

To Do: Neither a Hotel, Nor...

Cartoon Violence Also Has A Day Boring Day Job That It Hates, So It Understands

Gore Will Wait For Dems To Destroy Themselves

Hollywood Still Loves You, Mark Foley

Bush Warns Obama of Assassination Plot

Wonkette Sponsors Will Never Forget

Undersecretary of Defense Did Nothing Wrong, Undersecretary of Defense Finds

Own Bob Ney's Fridge

Daily Briefing: Yawn and Stretch

National Day of Mourning For Anna Nicole Smith?

Rumors On The Internets: Sober Advice Is Really No Advice At All

Jonah Goldberg Owes Us Money

Metro Section: Romancer Erector

Single Most Deluded Republican Staffer in DC Finally Found

Chuck Grassley Supports Sancho Panda in '08

Supreme Court Icon Anna Nicole Smith Drops Dead

BREAKING ... FITZ HAS RESTED HIS FREAKIN' CASE

Marion Barry Wants You Armed

Yay, Bush To Be Impeached ... By Republicans

To Do: Allow Not Nature More Than Nature Needs

Gossip Roundup: "Astronaut Love Triangle" Still Funny

Bushes Escaping To South America Next Month

Barry's World: 'Obamannouncement' On Saturday

Miss America Learns Not To Sleep With Gossip Columnists

Romney's Religion Not the Same Crazy B.S. Followed by Most Republicans

FBI Fighting the Real Enemy: Angry Teenagers

NY Rep Advocates Recruitment of Cunnilinguists

Chris Matthews Amuses, Confounds Us

Daily Briefing: Let the Eagles Drink More

Rumors On The Internets: Word Of the Day Is 'Screwed'

Metro Section: Fleet Feet

BREAKING: Lawmakers Upset About Working Half As Much as You

Tim Russert Makes Mafia-Gangland Deal With Fitzgerald

Miss America Has Lowered Her Sights

Ask a Lobbyist: Baltic Trysts

Gossip Roundup: Jacks

Council On Foreign Relations Also Sick of Iraq Occupation

$5.5 Billion (In Cash) Flown From DC To Iraq & Promptly 'Lost'

Bloggers: They're Just Like Us!

Rejoice, White America: KKK Makes a Comeback!

To Do: Buy Everyone's Book

DC's Next Gay Liason Could Be Best City Appointment Ever

Congressional VD Policy: Quarantine

Daily Briefing: One Billy On Dollars

Bush to Take On Cold Weather, Winter to Last 4 Years

Rumors On The Internets: It's Truthilicious

Metro Section: Vampires, Vodka, Marion Barry

Barry Hussein Obama Switches To Nicorette

House to Pass Very Upset Letter to the Editor

Gossip Roundup: Fowler Language

"Senior World Bank Official" Goes a Little Wild Over Spring Break

U.S. Census Bureau Wants Its Shopping Carts Back

AstroNut Gal a Product of Maryland & DC

America's Crappiest Senators

To Do: Sweet Seventeen

Teens Love Getting Schtupped by Old Congressmen

Ted Haggard Now Straight

Chugging Wine Behind the Gas Station: Young GOP'ers In Love

Kitty Harris: Citizen of the Year

Madison Club Celebrates Black History Month by Accepting a Colored Person

Never Forget 2/6/07: The Day of the Astronaut Story

Daily Briefing: Senators, Lift Up Your Weary Heads!

Newsweek Protects American Readers From George Clooney Interview

Rumors On The Internets: Don't Forget to Light a Candle, Match

Metro Section: Martha Dumptruck

Pat Buchanan is a Prophet Who We Think You Oughtta Listen To

Stewardess Unravels Awful Gov't Terror Conspiracy

Gossip Roundup: Party All the Time

Katherine Harris Will Never, Ever Leave

Judy Miller: Mossad Torture Agent

Opera-Loving Twice-Divorced Manhattan Dandy Announces Candidacy

White House Gay Prostitute Also Part of Wilson/Plame Smear

John Boehner Has the Hottest Office in Washington

To Do: Joy Division

NY Times Finally Notices That John Kerry Looks Like a Sad Horse

Democrats Regret Choice of Carlos Mencia as Hispanic Caucus Head

Rag-Tag Group of Misfits to Win War, Learn Important Lesson

Daily Briefing: Unpronounceable Symbols

Wonkette's Week in Review: Que Whore Es?

Rumors On The Internets: Regress to Impress

Metro Section: I Hate You

Old White Boomers Still Listening to Old White Boomer Music, Running Country

Patriotic John Warner Bravely Defeats Traitorous John Warner

A Very Special Message From Senator Joe Biden

Rice: No One Could've Predicted That the Bears Would Upset the Colts

To Do: See That Cockroach?

Wonk'd: First Things, First Lady

Pelosi Wants Air Force Shuttle Service; White House Leaks To Moonies

Gossip Roundup: Don't Mention the War

Shelley Dracula-Cunt Still Secretly In Congress

Wildlife Lobbyists Now Holding Animal Fights

But What Do Homosexuals Think About SF Mayor's Affair?

Mary Matalin: Rogue GOP Brain Surgeon

Cartoon Violence Is Going To Keep Rubbing Every Lamp It Finds

Mike Allen Will Not Be Denied

Wonkette Sponsors Are "Starting a Family"

Tornadoes Kill 14, Save Us From Chris Matthews

A Climate Change Is Gonna Come

Daily Briefing: Real and Spectacular

National Journal Not So Impressed With Mike Gravel Campaign

Meet America's Greatest Congresswoman ... But Don't Walk In Front Of Her

Congresswomen: Whores. Journos: Thieves

New Libby Strategy: "I Was Sooo High"

Working Poor Rejoice Over Senate Kindness

Rumors On The Internets: Don't Hate the Playa, Hate the International Committee

Metro Section: Some of My Best Friends Are ...

East Wing Shakeup!

Gossip Roundup: If Ford Did It...

Al Franken to Die in Mysterious Plane Crash

To Do: Give Your God-Damned Soul for Just a Glass of Beer

Hippies Shut Down Boston, Frustrate Newsmedia

Laura & George Break the Fast With Jesus & Dr. Collins

America's New Enemy Has Dreads, Watches Cartoons

Coming Soon to Libbygate: Abramson/Miller Smackdown!

Henry Kissinger Sleep-lies Through Another Committee Hearing

Tim Russert Hates Louder, Crazier Version of Self

Daily Briefing: Paid to Bum

Political Humor Columnist Trifecta: Who Must Die Next?

Rumors On The Internets: J-E-S-U-S

Metro Section: Cumbuckets!

Joe Baca Calls Loretta Sanchez a Whore, Democrats Continue to Be Bestest Majority Party Ever

Reverend Moon Will Find 'Em For Three, Catch 'Em and Kill 'Em For Ten

Stoners, Media Conglomerate Responsible for Boston Bomb Hoax

Jack Abramoff Remorseless, Bigger Than Jesus

Bush Boldly Tries To Kill Reporters With Tractor

That Guy & This Pres Somehow Prove Bush Guilty

Maliki To Be Tragically Killed By 'Insurgents' Next Week

We Missed Dick Cheney's Birthday!

Ask a Lobbyist: The Paper Chase

Late Night Shots' Final Solution(s) To 'Muslim Problem'

Gossip Roundup: Don't They Ever Stop Migrating?

Joe Biden Discovers Clean, Articulate Black Man

'Second Life' War Protest Ensures Continued Occupation of Iraq For Next 1,000 Years

To Do: Cover Self in Felt

Bush Admin Global Warming Plan Borrowed Liberally From 'Moonraker'

Senior Administration Officials: Like Regular Liars but With Secret Identities!

Fox News, Chuck Norris Confuse Nation

Daily Briefing: Seniterz Fer Peas

Fidel Castro Will Outlast 10 American Presidents, Out Of Spite

Barry Hussein Proposes "Give Up and Go Home" Bill

Help Name 18 Lousy Little Baby Pandas!

Metro Section: Intelligent Dance Music

'Post' Forced to Issue Correction Before MLK Center Breaks Their Thumbs

Rumors On The Internets: Cock, Diesel

Judy Miller Breathless, Nervous, Thirsty, Nervous

Bush Reads Jokes About Disastrous Administration

Gall Bladder, Chevy Impala Removed From Dennis Hastert

Gossip Roundup: Splash

Paul Wolfowitz Too Busy Ruining World To Buy Socks

Pentagon Launches Global War On Harvard Researcher

To Do: Outsider Art

Fake Pic Haunts Arnold-Lovin' Politician

Hillary's War On Anti-War Americans

Specter: Wah Wah Wah Wah, Wah-Wah Wah

Senate Refuses to Give House Another Lump of Coal

Today in Scooter Libby's Trial

Daily Briefing: Assembly of Experts

Feds Target Brian Ross & His Fake Cell Phone

Beloved Red Muppet Upstages Charles Schumer

Metro Section: Falling Apart

Rumors On The Internets: Narcoleptic Narcissists

Barry Hussein Rocked Eagle Rock!

J.R.R. Tolkien Now Writing Iraq War Script

Apocalypse Watch: Creeping Fashionism

Gossip Roundup: Ushered Out

Duncan Hunter's Brave Crusade Against Mexicans, History

Two-Journalist Families Can Only Afford $1.75M Houses

To Do: You Scoundrel

Jim Gibbons Is America's Stupidest Governor

Wacky Anti-War People Protest On Work Day!

Missed Connection: George Pataki's Future in Politics

Irresponsible Tim Johnson Rumormongering

We Support 'Insight'!

Daily Briefing: Smug Alert

Wonkette's Week in Review: Mr. Blabby Blab

Friday Night Funnies: Rove & Bartlett Get Subpoenas

Mike Huckabee Also Running For President, Wonkette To Drink Self To Death By June

Rumors On The Internets: Filthy Friday

Tom Vilsack's Totalitarian-Socialist Revolution

Duncan Hunter To Protect Iowans From Mexicans

Wonkette Is 2007 Unity Candidate! (So Vote For Us)

Metro Section: Not Wrong At All, Friend

Wonk'd: Real Congressmen, Fake Cops

Cartoon Violence Destroys The Treasured Myths Upon Which Your Reality Is Based

Sex and Crab Lice in High Society: The Chris Dodd Story

To Do: Relive the 90s

Shamed Giuliani/DHS Crook Sent To Guyana

Breakfast With the GOP Powerbrokers

Chris Dodd Is Putty In Our Hands

Virgil Goode Will Save Us From Mexico

Free Mumia! Tomorrow's the Big Anti-War March!

Get a Scholarship For Your Dumb Political Blog!

Wonkette Sponsors Are Exploring Their Options

CDC Adviser Arrested for Putting the "Public" in "Public Health"

Get Ready for President Hagel!

Daily Briefing: A Clockwork Broken

Rumors On The Internets: A Town Called Malice

Nancy Reagan: 'Drugs Open Your Eyes To Life'

David Gregory's "The Lighter Side Of..."

Free At Last, Almost: Noriega Will Be Released

Metro Section: Seriously, Who?

'Aggressively Humping Me ... Raping My Cell Phone'

Rapist President Thrown Out By House Committee!

National Institute of Health Division Bravely Edits Own Wikpedia Entry

Washington Post Calls Wonkette 'Conservative' ... Suck It, Libs

Neil Cavuto Introduces the New 'Fox & Friends' Line-up

E. Howard Hunt: Man of Letters & Many Mysteries

To Do: A Bad Day for Modernity

Gossip Roundup: Chairs Missing

Blind Item: Party Hopes Felled by Un-Caring Embassy Staff

Mormon Dirty Tricks: Is McCain Pro-Abortion?!

Scooter Libby Loves Tom Cruise!

Barry Hussein Obama Is On To You, John Kerry

Hillary Clinton Paying Right-Wing Blogs to Not Run Her Ads

Everyone in Senate Near Death

Daily Briefing: Say It With Nonbinding Resolutions

Metro Section: Soviet Safeway

Rumors On The Internets: That's Not a War Face

Bachmann Turner Overdrive: Presidential Porn Pix

In Which Dick Cheney Nearly Kills Wolf Blitzer With His Bare Hands

Kitty's Back in Town

Giuliani Campaign Conveniently Provides List of Reasons Giuliani Will Never Be President

Harry Reid Is Insane

SOTU Truth In Advertising

To Do: 3.0

When Did Mitt Romney Stop Stoning His Wife?

DC People Hate Kids; Help Wonkette Create Merch!

Crazy Old Walnuts Sleeps Through SOTU

SMITH POINT BURNS; LNS BLAMES WONKETTE

America Safe From Kerry Menace... For Now!

Hooray, Bachmann's Sexual Assault Video Now Works!

Gossip Columnist Forgets BCC, Angers Anonymous House Staffer On Way to 'Post'

Ask a Lobbyist: Sexual Flavors

SOTU Wrap-up: Behind the Podium

No Means No: Michele Bachmann Feels Up the President

Senate Foreign Relations Committee: Please Pretend to Pay Attention to Us

Daily Briefing: Wednesday Morning Quarterback

A Very Special Late Night Shots Critique of Jim Webb

SOTU Scorecard: Who Will Win?

Dem Response: Countdown to Webb's Aneurysm

SOTU Round Three

SOTU II: Revenge of the Terrorists

SOTU Liveblogging: Like Woodstock For Wolf Blitzer

Rumors On The Internets: Do You SOTU?

State of the Stuff

1970s Slightly Closer To Ending: E. Howard Hunt Finally Dead

SOTU: Terrorists Used Clouds As Weapons

Civic-Minded Drinkers Unite For SOTU Binges!

And Nancy Pelosi Pulls the Warrants From Under Her Skirt ...

Gossip Roundup: Speaker's Box

To Do: Drink for Victory

BREAKING ON CNN: IS BUSH A LAME DUCK?!

Happy Politico Day!

SOTU Drinking Game Is Juiced Up Beyond Belief!

George W. Bush Not Really Shopping For Courgettes

Libby Circus Is in Town!

Wonkette's State of the Union Schedule Is Strong

Hillary Clinton Doesn't Want Your Dirty Money, Unless You Have a Lot of It

Daily Briefing: SOTU STFU

Most Populous State Could Become Politically Relevant!

Rumors On The Internets: A Fully Armed and Operational Media Conglomerate

CNN Investigates Obama's Non-Madrassa Grade School

Metro Section: Casual Encounters

Press Release of the Day: Whatcha Gonna Do Without Your Ass

Andrew Sullivan Lured to 'The Atlantic' by David Bradley's Scones

What Would Jeb Do?

NY Post's Hilarious Ethnic Headline

SOTU Preview: Always Keep a Diamond In Your Mind

It's Officially DC Dirty Video Day!

Early Signs Point to Success of Iraq Surge

BREAKING ON CNN: DAN QUAYLE NOT RUNNING FOR PREZ

Gossip Roundup: Baby Mo Problems

State of the Union, Nekkid Girl, Tortured Puppies

Now Who's Crazy? Washington Post Reveals Gov't Mind Control Horrors

To Do: Old Europe

Dear Penthouse: I Never Thought I'd See Obama's Wife's Bare Midriff ...

First of 1,000 Anti-McCain Ad Airs On CNN

Rich Little Impersonates Last 37 Living People Who Sound Vaguely Like Johnny Carson, Dick Nixon

$28 Million Georgetown Murder Scene Bought by Aspiring Media Mogul, Natch

Chuck Schumer's Book to End With M. Night Shyamalan-esque Twist

Daily Briefing: Not True, Man

Hillary Makes It Official, Ruins Schumer's Chinese Dinner

Wonkette's Week in Review: Too Soon, Too Soon

Rumors On The Internets: He's So Dreamy

Brownback Nation!

Metro Section: 2 Uzis

Political Bloggers No Longer Required To Wear Blue Hats

Angry Old Man Claims to Have Been "Vice President"

Bill Richardson To Be First Half-Latino President!

Islamo-Facism (and Lil' Kim) At Your Fingertips!

Wonk'd: Barely Legal

'I'm Gettin' High,' by Jenna Bush

Buy Your Own $28 Million Georgetown Murder Scene

To Do: Journey to the Center of Your Empty Fucking Skull

Oh No ... 100 Hour Reich Has 57 Hours Remaining

Henry Kissinger Admits Iraq Occupation Is Just For Oil

White House Correspondents Association Now Lies Just Like White House

Cartoon Violence Will Try To Say Something Nice, For Once

Will Our Kitty Finally Go To Jail Forever?

Ney Gets 2 Years and Change, Nation Struggles to Remember Which One He Was

Wonkette Sponsors Go Play Hoop

Condoleezza Rice, Student of Irrelevant History

Obama: WE GO RUN PRESIDENT

Mike Beebe: Champion of Public Safety

Daily Briefing: Long Live Ethics

Rumors On The Internets: Art Imitates That Loudmouth Guy You Really Hate

Metro Section: Expensive Club Outfits

Will Hillary Smoke Obama Out Of His Cave?

Iraq Prime Minister's Plea: Please Don't Kill Me

Hillary's Horror: Iraq War Not Exactly Popular With Dems

John Kerry Totally Gay For Tom Brady, As If You Needed More Reasons to Hate the Man

Gossip Roundup: Like Gambling, But Lame

Precious Freedoms: Thomas Jefferson & Talking Cartoon Poop

Pentagon Caught Inventing 'Canadian Spy Coin' Story

Democratic Leadership To Register Bloggers, Issue Blue Hats

Breaking: 'People' Had a Washington Bureau

Ted Stevens' Wife Always Plotting Against Us

2008 Backlash Watch

It's Like the Odd Couple, But With Four Slovenly Lawmakers

To Do: Kind Bud

Former 'Post' Reporter Leonard Zelig Reports for Jury Duty

NYT Reports: Women Be Shopping

Cunton Keepin' On: A Plea For Less Ambiguous Onscreen Typefaces

Daily Briefing: Praise the Lord, FISA the Light

Rumors On The Internets: God is Dead

DC Will Finally Get Local 'Onion' Paper ... Published by Washington Post

Metro Section: The Big Shit on the Block

Gossip Roundup: Hey Ladies

Kerry Defends Nixon, Windsurfing

Happy Birthday, Ben Franklin!

Bush Calls Lawmaker Out on Preferring Fish to Victory

Ask a Lobbyist: Democrazy in Action

The War Will End On January 27!

Georgia Congressman Really Hates Florida's College Football Champs

To Do: Magic

'Newsweek' Basically Guaranteeing Obama's Early Death

Tom Coburn, King of the Tortured Metaphor

Area Legislator Very Upset Over Redskins Season

Daily Briefing: Paint The White House Black

Dennis Kucinich Another Day Older & Deeper In Debt

Rumors On The Internets: April Still Cruelest Month

Metro Section: Quick & Dirty

Wash 'Times' Asks: What Did You Get Your Maid for MLK Day?

Countdown to Coup: Pack a Suitcase, Maliki

State Dept. Formally Denies Bush's South American Escape Plans

Super Surge War On Terror Roundup

FACEBUSH UPDATE: BARBARA'S PROFILE REVEALED

Libby Trial Madness!

Support Obama With Creepy Stalinist Poster!

Gossip Roundup: Marble Shower

Longworth Evacuated As Dudes Get Off In Bathrooms

'The State of the Union Is ... Screwed Beyond Belief'

Barack Hussein Obama Does That Thing Everybody Knew He Would Do

Pretend Congresswoman Gets Gold Star For Attendance

To Do: Franco

URGENT, BREAKING: BUSH TWIN ON FACEBOOK

Bob Hope Sadly Too Dead to Headline WCHA Dinner

Daily Briefing: 99% Perspiration

Everybody Loves the 'Montgomery Method'

Metro Section: Cheap Date

Bush Interview in Convenient/Worrying Graphic Form

Tommy Lasorda Imagines Connection To RFK Assassination

Happy Pentagon Day!

Iraq/Afghanistan Wars Hit Vietnam/Korean War Prices

Barack Hussein Obama: Terrorist Sex Offender

Tim Pawlenty Really Loves Being Governor

Terrorists Tire of Iraq, Attack U.S. Wal-Mart

Jesus, Chris, George & Marty

To Do: Venture out of NW

Happy First Super Bowl Day!

Gossip Roundup: Page Problems

MLK's Dream: White Guys Pandering

Bill Bennett Lays Odds on Bachmann

Daily Briefing: A Day On

Wonkette's Week In Review: 'My Name's Dr. Multimillionaire and I Kicked Your Ass'

Rumors On The Internets: Earthly Delights

Ford: Carter a Loser, Reagan a Moron

Metro Section: Journalism, Crime and Beer

But the 'Sweets & Flowers' Are Hidden Inside Car Bombs ...

Wonk'd: The Goose Liver Insurgency Must Be Stopped

Guns & Dope Party Founder R.A. Wilson Is Dead

To Do: Librarian Fetish

!Bienvenidos a Mexico!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Kerry Actually Did Something

The Surge Is Already Working!

Bipartisanship Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry

Even Drudge Now Mocks Crying Dubya

Cartoon Violence Is A Nancy Boy

No Surge Speech Photographs Allowed

Wonkette Sponsors Will Never Strand You in Space

Condi, Don't Take Your Love to the Foreign Relations Panel

Bush Administration Incompetence to Expand Scope Past Atmosphere

Daily Briefing: A Man, A Plan, A Quagmire

Rumors On The Internets: Love the Nightlife

Coalition of the Unwilling: UK Pulling 1/3 of Troops From Iraq

Metro Section: FedEx Heights

Freshman Rep. to Rove: "I Kicked Your Ass"

From Greatest Generation To Neighborhood Watch

Decoding The Note: Cocksucker Blues

Chris Dodd Got Crabs from John Doe, Still Not Cool

Save America! Ron Paul For President!

Howard Dean Doesn't Care About Black People: DNC Picks Denver

Jon Stewart To Maybe Help WaPo's Web Demographics

Schools Ban Al Gore's Movie, Suggest Teachers Maybe Do Some Teaching

Captain Nerd Visits Bridge of USS House of Representatives

Gossip Roundup: Wrath of Khan

Bush Speech Response Best Handled by Game Show Contestant

To Do: Revive Pavement

Condoleezza Rice Loves Old White Guys

Chris Dodd Is Taking Requests

Bloggers to Liveblog Blogging Scooter Libby's Trial (Blog)

Dead Maliki Walking

Daily Briefing: Responsibility Rests

Rumors On The Internets: Oh, S@$#!

Democrats To Bush: You Are So High It's Not Even Funny

Live-Blogging the Surge Speech: Let's Laugh Together

Last Minute Surge Speech Drinking Game

Freedom On March, Iraqis Already Learning to Pass Buck Downward

Metro Section: Floyd R. Turbo

The Surge Already Started! Suck It, Teddy Kennedy!

So We've Lost the 'War On Terror,' Too?

Joe Scarborough Sends Blogger Friendliest C&D Ever

Posted in POLITICS by T. Paine, 01/10/1776

To Do: Hip Check

Super Special Pre-Speech Surge Poll!

Ask a Lobbyist: Peace! Land! Bread! Circuses!

Pelosi Doesn't Stop War, Steals Our Precious Freedoms

Everybody's Heard About the Surge

20,000 Troop Surge Will Be Fabulous

Schwarzenegger's Insurance Scheme a 'Moral Travesty'

Gossip Roundup: Wu's Next

Shocking Photo Proves What Nobody Ever Doubted

Newseum Now Driving People To Suicide

Broken Metro Cars Mysteriously Keep Crashing

Gaze Upon Drunken Movie Star At Local Video Shop!

News From Iraq: CNN Outrage!

Vote Romney/Kucinich in '08!

Ted Kennedy's Ass Cushion

Daily Briefing: Resisting the Urge

Rumors On The Internets: Mixtape Messiah

Tucker Carlson Update: Washingtonian Next to be Destroyed

The Beloved Republican: Arnold Gives Health Care To California

Only 95 Hours To Go!

Metro Section: Bless My Poor Wife

Richard Nixon: America's Greatest Celebrity

DC Blog Party to Feature Awkward Small Talk, No Free Booze

Steve Jobs Hanging to be Captured, Uploaded to Internet With New iPhone

Richard Nixon: America's Greatest Liberal

Gossip Roundup: Gimme Some Money

BREAKING ... TIM JOHNSON UPGRADED TO 'FAIR' CONDITION

Ted Kennedy To GWB: You're Done, Punk

To Do: Inland Empire

Happy Birthday To America's Greatest President!

'People' Furnishes the Pictures, Milbank Furnishes the War

Kitty's Congressional Seat Still In Play

Santorum Paid Big Bucks to be Scared of Everyone

Tucker Carlson Gets Blogger Fired, Rents "Crash"

Surge Overkill

Daily Briefing: Bottom Up

New Jersey To Join USA & Allow Idiots To Vote

Rumors On The Internets: Saddam's Apple

World Actually Ending; Poor, Minorities Hardest Hit

House Democrats' 100-Hour Reign of Terror Finally Over

Metro Section: Ain't Nothin' Holdin' Me Back Nothin'

Another Nixon-Reagan Corpse Dug Up For Dubya

Sad RNC Party Pictures Reveal Fresh November Wounds

America Under Attack by Odors, Dead Birds, Bombs & Chemical Clouds

Washington Post Aids Identity Theft of Dead Soldier

Invisible Law Stays Invisible, Sez Supreme Court

We Actually Won the Iraq War, Hooray!

Gossip Roundup: Drinking the Kool-Aid

Elvis and Nixon, America's Beloved Pill-Popping Paranoid Red Baiters

To Do: A Couple of Swells

Joe Biden Announces Candidacy For President, Resolution of Unexplained Identity Crisis

Word of the Day: Malkin

Poor, Trusting Matt Drudge Betrayed Again

America's Mayor: Gotta Dance

Soledad O'Brien Is A Better Parent, Less Racist Than You

New DC Mayor Off to Bad Start With Wonkette Operatives

Daily Briefing: Anywhere it Wants

Thanks To Cheney, Our Long National Nightmare Will Never End

Wonkette's Week in Review: 6,000 Minutes In Heaven

Rumors On The Internets: Ali, Ali Oxen Free

A Very Special Malkin War On Christmas

Urgent: Do Not Sleep With Anyone In the Department of Labor

Metro Section: Everybody Loves Them Dead Presidents

Karen Hughes Hates Kids

Wonk'd: It Ain't That Cold

Nancy Pelosi & Ann Coulter Share Secret Passion

Gossip Roundup: On Bended Knee

Robert Byrd's God Can't Help Him Now

TSA Personnel Will Not Touch the Monkey

To Do: Blackface, Soul and The Police

Psychotic Nevada Guv's Midnight Oath Scam Revealed!

Dems Bold New Plan: Strongly-Worded Letters

AP's Mysterious Iraqi Police Source Is Real & Soon To Be Executed

Cartoon Violence: It's Never Too Soon

Your Press Corps Also Knows Women Can't Drive

Wonkette Sponsors Are Hopped Up on Placidyl

Daily Briefing: No Nancy Boy

Bush 41 Has Another Hip Replaced

Today We're All Russian-Japanese-1970s-WWII Communists

Metro Section: The Claw

Bill Clinton Breaks Senate Rules & Mocks Cheney's Heart

Rumors On The Internets: If You Threw a Party

Nancy Pelosi Now Free To Hammer Children

Rehnquist, Like Everyone Else, Spent the Entire '70s High

Vandal With Lots of Time on Hands Target Virgil Goode

Mark Dayton to Hate Being Governor

100 Hour Reich!

To Do: Uncle Schmiel!

Virgil Goode Attacked By Muslim Terrorist On House Floor

Fox News Alert: Cattle Missing In New Mexico!

Gossip Roundup: Afternoon Tea

Kitty's Ghost Haunts DC Ice Cream Shop

New Senate Day!

Pretend President Gets Real-Life Aircraft Carrier!

Scatology: 2001-2007 (Harriet Miers Resigns)

Barack Hussein Called Osama Again

First Few Desperate Hours

John Negroponte Demoted

Daily Briefing: Gone Til November, 2008

Rumors On The Internets: Sex, Drugs, and Punditry

Metro Section: We're Moving on Up

All Is Forgiven, CNN.com Editors

Military Campaigns to Wrap Up in Three Acts (With No Broker's Fee)

Never Forget the Two Gals Who Tried To Kill Gerald Ford!

CNN.com Now Run By Pre-Schoolers

To Do: For Your Consideration

Fox News Alert: George W. Bush Admits Cocaine Habit

Pat Robertson Plotting Nuclear Attack On America

Ask a Lobbyist: Career Opportunities

Gossip Roundup: Fourth and Long

Keith Ellison Shocker: Thomas Jefferson Hated America!

Katherine Harris, Living on the Air

Fox's Most, Least Attractive Anchors Hook Up

More Bushes Terrify New York

Daily Briefing: No Pratfalls Here

Rumors On The Internets: Whip Inflation Now!

Big in '07: Public Hanging CosPlay

McCain Campaign Steals Rudy's Secret Strategery Plans

Metro Section: G's Up

To Do: Choose from Passive or Aggressive

His Final, Heroic Act

Wolf Hitler Apologizes To Barack Hussein Osama

Jimmy Carter Personally Hauling Ford's Corpse To Michigan

Bar Crash: Black Cat Smoke Out

CNN Doesn't Care About Black People

Hot TV Journo Totally Single

Did Glamour Gal Bob Dole Get a Facelift?

Louisiana Politics: New Black Mayor Shot To Death

Gossip Roundup: Cannon Fodder

Ford's Childhood Home Taken Over by Gays

As Iraq Collapses, Bush Moves On to 80-Day World Circumnavigation Plan

Daily Briefing: A Change is Gonna Come

Waitress-Slapping Drunken Governor's Secret Midnight Oath